Really Metroixer, thats it? No "Holy shit, here come the cops!" moments in your life?
No "Holy Shit, This is going to be really painful!" moments? If all the cats in my house were to walk outside and evaporate I'd throw a block party.
Moments
Nearly drowning
Nearly dehydrating after getting my tonsils and adnoids out.
"Sir, you need to come back here and empty your pockets"(Damn I was stupid 4 years ago)
Going down a steep hill on a used decade old bike and the chain slipped. Such a racking and face plant I hope I never have to live through.
Eating a piece of string cheese that looked fresh but actually was from the late Jurassic period. You thought you've projectile vommited before? You thought wrong. My dry heaves were wetter than most pukes.
Seeing Anderson shank the field goal in the 98 NFC championship game. Felt like I was going to die.
Just the other week my brother set the siding of the house on fire smoking flavored cigars with his dipshit friends. Just threw a hot match right out the window! I was in the basement at the time and the firefighters said that if it weren't for the neighbor's phone call it would have burned for at least 30 more minutes and a quarter of the house would have been destroyed.
Car crash with a truck. Also related, spinning out across the road, over the sidewalk, and through 2 fences during Driver's ed. A noob in a 4 seater shitmobile without powersteering, snow tires, or 4 wheel drive during a borderline blizzard is a recipe for a disaster.
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R.I.P. H.S.T.
I wanna have El Scrabino's man babies.
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