Silly forumers. Your "gay story, won't reply" attitude dosn't phase me!
On to the sequel!
PART TWO - The Overgrown Lobster
I can't remember how long I'd been walking for. I had a deck of Winfield 25 ciggerettes with me and tried to smoke half of them on the way. I ended up wasting half of them as every time I'd light one up, I'd throw the ciggerette away because of the awful sensation going down my burnt throat. I wasn't serious about finding 'Big Red' on my walk, I was going to turn back after a while and come back to them, spinning a yarn about finding a scrab and forcing it to run away.
Was I worried about running into a real scrab? Of course not. For one I was stoned, and I had my desenstizer wrist watch on. Even if I found a scrab it wouldn't detect my presence. Or that's what I thought.
I stopped out in the middle of the desert coming to the realisation that I might not be able to find my way back to the campsite. I stood there for at least half an hour not knowing what I was to do or where to go, so I lit up another ciggerette. That's when I saw the scrab.
It wasn't 'Big Red' but the sight of any scrab is terrifying for anyone. It was about a stones throw away so I wasn't too afraid. The scrab seemed to stop walking and looked directly in my direction. It then shrieked while bending its torso towards me in the one movement.
I stood there frozen. Did it know I was there? Was it my ciggerette smoke that had given me away? The scrab let out a howl and then advanced on me.
That's when I realised, my wrist watch! It'd batteries had drained completely, this scrab could sense me around a mile off. It began to canter towards me, then I dropped my smoke and ran. I pumped my arms hard and strode my legs as far as I could hoping to God that I was taking myself in the right direction back to the campsite. I was a fast runner but no human can out run a scrab over long distance. It galloped after me, its four legs easily out matching my two. I panicked and turned my head to see where the scrab was. It was gaining distance easily and I knew in another 5 seconds it would be right on me. Desperatly I strode my legs faster panting, and hoping that someone back at base camp would be out and have seen me. I looked around again to find the scrab was now only 2 metres away. Then I hit something hard and reeled backwards onto the soft sand. I did not care if the scrab got me anymore, I was too sedated. I then heard a loud shriek and passed out.
***
Have you ever woken up in the morning thinking how good it is to be at home in bed, and then remembering an incident that occurred the night before and realising everything is not alright? Well that is like what happened to me when I woke up in the middle of the desert. At first I thought I'd just passed out behind the caravan. I closed up my eyes again and rolled on my side. My eyes slid open lazily and I saw a half eaten scrab lying dormant beside me. "Woh" I murmered. "HEY GUYS." I yelled. Noone answered. "ROD COME HERE!" I called. Rod answered me with a scrab shriek.
In a flash I remembered everything that happened before I passed out. Scrambling to my feet I turned around to where the howl came from and there just facing me were the biggest pait of Scrab legs I'd ever seen. I looked up fearfully and saw Big Red's head facing down towards me. I fell over backwards screaming and backing away til I hit the rock that I ran into that night. I cowered there gibbering and buried my head into my lap shaking. Thn I began to sob uncontrollably wishing I'd never done anything so stupid last night and wondering what everyone would think when they found me lying in the desert with just a few remains left. I heard the dull thud of the scrabs pincers advancing towards me and waited for my fate. For nearly 2 minutes I sat there not daring to run away. But why hadn't he attacked me yet. I nervously raised my head to find the scrab bent over, offering a piece of bloody raw meat in front of me. Still shaking, I looked up at him confused. What was he doing? Humans are natural enemies of scrabs and although they don't much appreciate the taste of us, they will still kill and devour our bodies on sight.
Slowly, I raised my arm out to grab the meat. When my hand was nearly under it Big Red dropped it in my palm which made me jump. He then backed off and shrieked at me as if telling me to 'eat'.
The meat looked disgusting. I'd always imagined it'd be a taste of something between lobster and crab, but it looked simply awful. It was wet and slimy and although it there was a pale green colour under the white texture. I ate it timidly feeling uneasy with the big scrab watching. The meat was as disgusting as I'd thought. It was bland, jelly like and oozing with a horrible juice that was salty and very sour. But I was so hungry and scared that I ate all of it. When I'd finished the scrab gave a cry of joy, howling and stamping its feet into the ground. The sight of this made me cower again, looking up at the scrab in terror. It stopped and backed off a few paces before drooping its torso. Then it let out a deep faltering howl while I gazed in bewilderment. Big Red seemed to be actually crying! After five minutes of telling myself to get up, I finally plucked up enough courage to advance towards it. Cautiously, I raised my arm slowly and finally landed my palm on its beak, terrified of the consequences if I'd figured him out wrongly. The scrab though, did nothing, just continued to howl and seemed to whimper in its short breaths. I lost all nerves and began to smile.
"You're just a big softy arn't you mate." I chuckled, stroking the beasts great beak. Big Red stopped howling and began to nuzzle into my arm as I continued to pat him. "Why's a big scrab like you looking after me anyway?" I murmered.
Then I noticed the noise of a thunderstorm building up to a crescendo. Turning I saw a large dustclowd in the distance, and as it emerged I could faintly make out unmistakeable images of scrabs on the rampage. Big Red raised his enormouse beak to the sky nearly bowling me over, and let out a massive howl of anger. He then swung his neck towards me and rammed me behind the huge rock. My eyes widened as they peeped around the corner to find scores of scrabs, charging towards Big Red!
Hows my writing? Call 1900 kiss my scrabby arse
__________________
(Growing a mullet in support of the Socceroos)
Last edited by Slig_Cake; 04-02-2006 at 06:47 PM..
|