Wired,
First, depending on how much you read into haiku, the 5-7-5 syllable thing isn't the only rule around them... in fact it doesn't really apply when writing in english.
Full info here.
As for your second poem...
Okay, rhyming couplets are a very classic and obvious style (people see them and think "poem", that's why I call them obvious. It's not a bad thing). The problem with couplets is that for them to work fully you need to have lines of the same length in beats (or syllables), othewise it doesn't flow well. Also, you really should add some punctuation. While it's not vital to have in poems, it really makes it easier to read and understand. It also slows down the reader a bit, which can really help.
I've got some poems on OWF (in a very old thread at this stage) if you want to read them... I might start posting more here. Anyway, there
right here if you're interested.