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"That eye makeup makes your eyes look reeeely big, I would not enjoy the extra vision it would afford me."
Yeah, it still doesn't make much sense...
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Alpha has a habit of not making sense (mostly because he is in fact stupid), but I do feel that your translation may be faulty.
I have a feeling that he's actually talking about hunting for girls, rather than anything about the eye makeup. But your subtitle was funny anywho.