View Single Post
  #5  
06-12-2005, 04:28 PM
odd chick's Avatar
odd chick
Outlaw Shooter
 
: Nov 2004
: United States
: 1,275
Rep Power: 22
odd chick  (10)

Interesting chapter, Sliguy-I liked how the slig and the kids got into the scuffle and Ryan's excuse was that he had a heart-attack! There was only one teeny little error that I noticed and it was this: "Him and Carla found their mouths very close together. " That should've been HE and Carla. Other than that, it was great as usual.
Keep it going!
__________________
" Like, destroy all squishies....and stuff." -Skidd McMarxx in Ratchet and Clank: Up Your Arsenal

Reply With Quote