Looking good so far. One bit of advice. When you switch between speaking characters, put it on a new line, for example(BTW this is from one of my fics...too lazy to think of something on the fly):
"It may not seem possible to you now." Ishtar said, softly, "but you will find happiness. You just have to look hard enough."
"What would I look for?" Dementa asked looking up, her face stained with tears.
"That only the fates know..." Ishtar said, "I never got your name by the way..."
"Dementa."
This way it makes it a little easier to read.
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