I must congratulate you all on your hightened sense of maturity. Really, I mean it. I would have expected a lot less maturity in something like this. Although I usually keep such things to close friends, in the name of experimentation. Though it's fairly obvious some of you here are lying.
I'm feeling particularly evil at the moment, so allow me to humiliate Kevin.
:
Peter: "Hey Kevin, you know what I heard?"
Kevin: "What?"
Peter: "Well, apparently, studies have shown that masturbating more than five times a week reduces prostate cancer significantly."
-- However, Kevin misheard me, instead thinking I said "increases" instead of "reduces". At this point, Kevin's face contorts and he lets out a whimperish "Oh my God".
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Oh, and stop masturbating. It's against the Christian religion, you blasphemous people. You're all going to Hell! *evil laughter*
Alcar...