Hey, big spen-der!
Dig this blen-der!
Rainbow suspenders!
*We surr-en-der!*
...
SPEnnd some time with Dante's Oddysee!
Chapter 16
Okay, now that I had some sense as to where it was I was going, I could focus on getting the hell out of there.
As I skipped along (that’s actually what paramites refer to it as in their own minds; it isn’t running, it is skipping), I found it easier and easier to navigate through the woods. And, being a big bad paramite made all the lesser beasts back away. There were more than jyggs in these woods, after all. A few rogue slogs wandered about, and what I wanted to call a meech was hopping between treetops overhead. Life as usual in Muto.
My paramite mind would’ve loved to stop and begin a nest here. Untouched by mudokon, glukkon, and slig alike for years, it was a utopia that all paramites could enjoy. I was sure of it. But, they had the sanctity of Paramonia as it was, so oh well.
Nothing really happened as I hurried along. I won’t bore you with the details of choosing between left and right at the few forks in the path. No animals stood up to me, so I was home free.
This is the part of any story where you’d like to assume something bad is going to happen to the hero. Well … sorry to disappoint you, but I got through unscathed. Seriously, as soon as I reached the border of the forest and sensed light, there was no more reason to fear anything. Well, sure, there was a huge curtain of
rain like you wouldn’t
believe not five feet from the end of the path, but otherwise, no trouble.
I decided that being a paramite in the rain wouldn’t suffice in a rainstorm that massive. They’re small, after all, and could get easily washed away. And in the case of a flood, a paramite was worse off than a mudokon, who could at least try and pedal his arms back to shore. Paramite joints didn’t move like that. So, I focused deeply on my mudokon body.
I expected massive changes, as I had felt when becoming the paramite, but instead I felt as if I were inflating. Like a big paramite balloon. I heard a small
pop!ing sound, and there I was, in my natural body. I reached up to feel for my earring, and when I was satisfied it was still there, I checked for my stitches. Of course, they were intact. A bit dismayed, I sighed. I guess stitches in my lips weren’t going to change.
So, anyway, I hiked into the rain, arms over my head. It was probably warmer now that there was no wind, but the cold rain made it worse. My feathers were ruffling already. As I moved, I tried to remember the name of the place that I was in. There was definitely a big, rainy place on my itinerary, and I think it was called Trinidad, or Riddle, or Trapped, or something. I could remember the place’s description, but not the name …
the light of day began to return here, though this was a land tortured by constant rains. Shadows and sickening water are abundant. There is a beast to conquer here, and he isn’t particularly gentle.
Wait.
A
beast?!?!
Uh-uh, no way, no how.
What was I supposed to do, go and punch it in the head? I mean, if it’s a beast, what can I do about it? I can’t exactly fight a wild animal—I’m a mudokon! Wild animals eat us three meals a day and in between!
As I was panicking, I hustled into what I hadn’t realized was a set off clearing, surrounded by large totem poles. In an effort to distract my runaway train of thought, I inspected the tall poles.
Each one was carved into the faces of the creepiest, scariest, and all-around nightmariest creatures Mother Odd ever decided to create.
The scrab heads carved into the pole looked in different directions, two at a time. They were stacked seven heads high, and one looked left, the other to the right on each level, making fourteen heads per totem.
I shuddered. It was such a deep shudder I could feel individual bones inside me shaking. Scrabs had always given me the creeps, and to see that this place was dedicated in their honor only made it worse. I took quick, jerky glances around, and drops of rainwater flung from my head as I did so. I felt my soggy feathers, limp and wet, flapping around behind my head.
Then I heard the first cry. It was high pitched and shrill, almost like nails on a chalkboard combined with the scream of a young girl.
I thought, okay, one scrab, I’ll still probably die, but I can handle one scrab.
But, of course, another scream answered it, this time from far behind me. As I jumped (and another five years fell off of my life), I spun around and heard galloping sounds.
Heavy scrab footfalls from both directions. Rain slamming down on and around me. Hungry, snorting, ripping sounds. Jaws clicking, teeth gnashing, I knew the scrabs were in a fight.
And I stood between them.
In the town where i was born lived a man who sailed the sea, and he told us of his life in the land of submarines. So we sailed up to the sun till we found a sea of green, and we lived beneath the waves in our yellow submarine.
And since we all live together in this yellow submarine, teling jokes and stories, why don't we comment on this one a bit more often? I don't feel very appreciated anymore ... except by Esus, but that's because Esus is the Man.
