Oh. My. God.
I have two fans!
Whoo!
Anywho, why not continue my Triumphant Return to Oddworld Forums with ... you guessed it ...
CHAPTER 4
I felt a vague sensation of moving, but without moving. It was like I was sliding on a stationary floor. Almost like a conveyor belt. I forced my eyes open and wasn’t surprised to see the ceiling sliding away overhead. That’s funny, I thought. I’m on a conveyor belt, like the ones in the—
[SUDDEN WINKS VISION]
I saw myself working back in Zulag 1. I remember my job was taking the sedated friets and jyggs and placing them on a conveyor belt that passed under a procession of meat grinders. I remember being fascinated by the way the animals were torn apart, always thankful that I wasn’t on the belt.
[/SUDDEN WINKS VISION]
I WAS GONNA BE A MUDOKON POP!
Thanking all that is Odd with every fiber in my body that there was nothing on the belt to hold me down, I sat bolt upright, jumped to my feet, and leaped off the belt.
I can’t remember all the details of what happened next, but I’ll try to recollect …
The two sligs on duty in the room shouted. I dropped to my hands and knees and rolled under the belt, where there was less room to aim. The other muds in the room acted nonchalant, as I remember, but I heard whistles like “Oh, crap, Dante’s in for it, now!” and “Do it, Dan! Do it!”
One slig commanded me to come out and get on the belt—a bullet wound would spoil the meat (although I think back and can’t imagine why that would matter). So I came out, stood up, and instantly swung my left paw into the slig’s face, sending him reeling. The other was too shocked to react in time, as I smacked him, too.
As the first was standing, I had an idea. Maybe the Zippys overhead could take down the sligs! I spoke one of the few words I knew: “Freeze!”
The zippy shook for about a half second, and in that time I had sprinted toward and plowed into the nearer slig. Being a stronger and more versatile creature, I took the pain, but the slig, whom I crashed into simultaneously, didn’t have the fortitude to live … and the other slig was already radioing for backup. There was a rouge mudokon, hostile.
And armed, I thought with a smile, picking up the first slig’s gun. The other turned to me and demanded that I should freeze, while I simply pointed the gun’s barrel and pulled the trigger.
Damn! My hands throbbed after that. I could never get why sligs could handle the kickback on those things. I pulled another shot at the zippy overhead.
My audience was thrilled. Whistles pierced my ears not long after the zippy went down.
“Dante! You rock!”
“Dahn-tay! Dahn-tay!”
I raised my hands. With my creaky voice, I repeated some of the most famous words any mudokon ever spoke.
“Hello. Follow me.”
And my five mudokon comrades said, “Okay.”
Who rocks? Dave rocks!
I wonder how many people actually do read this ...
I'd like to ask anyone who reads this story with any sort of regularity to post some kind of comment, please. I'm a nice person, really!
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