[Jacob]

not anything "funny" like lose weight

lol, that was the advice i was gonna give you.

I could never be fat, i keep having nightmares about it and so im on a constant diet...not too skinny and, hopefully, not too fat.

Guy: What a huge ass!

The best comeback for that is;

"Dont be so hard on yourself..."

Or something like that, but i prefare the more insulting approach...

"And what a miniscule penis..."

You then have to point at his groin.

Then if he goes;

"And how the f*ck would you know...?"

Just say;

"Well, if you take after your dad, it will be..."

Then if he goes;

"Shut the f*ck up, my dad wunt touch a dog like you..."

Say;

"Thats right, he prefares Sheep..."

Then if he says;

"F*ck you..."

Say;

"Wow, three words out from what your dad said to me last night..."

Its a rather amusing game to play...