King Minos' Judgement
 

Just an idea for a thread I cooked up - wondering if anyone's game.

I read a lot of classical literature. One of my favourite older pieces is Dante's Divine Comedy, with the Inferno being easily my favourite part. I've read it many times, and after my latest read-through I thought of this game.

King Minos is the Judge of Sin in Hell, according to Dante. It is he who judges which Sin the soul is most guilty of, and sends them to the corresponding circle of Hell, where they often receive a poetically ironic punishment for the rest of eternity. I know all of the Sins, circles, and punishments, and have my book at hand; the game is, tell me your most frequent Sin, and I'll tell you what's coming to you in Hell, according to Dante.

So, step up and divulge your Sins!

DISCLAIMER: I'm playing Devil's Advocate here (no pun intended); I'm actually not faithful, and would most certainly be going to Hell myself. This is just a bit of fun; I don't mean to offend anyone, and certainly don't believe you deserve any of the punishments myself.

I don't need your book. When I get to hell, Lucifer himself will personally hand me a shovel and tell me to start digging.

The lucifer? Unless I'm mistaken Dante seems to be referring to ancient Greek mythology, King Minos (from Theseus and the Minotaur) sends evil people, ordinary people and heroes to Tartarus, the Asphodel Meadows and the Elysium Fields respectively. I'm a bit of a nerd when it comes to Greek mythology.

So yeah Havoc you have further displeased our heavenly father by confusing Christianity with pagan beliefs.

Goresplatter what ironic punishment would one receive for sloth?

My most frequent sin is not getting any sex.

Dante draws from Greek mythology frequently, but the Inferno is still ultimately Christian. King Minos is the judge of Sin only; he has nothing to do with those that go to Purgatory or Heaven. While Minos, the Minotaur, and Cerberus, are all in the Inferno, Tartarus, the Meadows and the Elysium fields are not. Being Christian, Lucifer is certainly present, half frozen in the deepest circle.

Funnily enough, there isn't a direct mention to the Sin of Sloth by Dante, however, application of creative thinking would send you to the third circle, Gluttony, which punishes not only those who ate more than they should have, but over-indulged in other things - this could be applied to sleep or relaxation.

In the third circle, guarded by Cerberus (the 'Great Worm'), you would be immersed in sludge and ceaseless cold, pelting rain, unable to pay heed to any of the other sufferers around you, symbolic of the selfishness of your indulgence.

I don't get this thread.

my most recent sin that I'm willing to confess is lying about if I had homework

It's an ego boost duh.

Makes sense!

I do not believe. That right there is probably my number 1 sin, in regards to christianity. Even if I did believe I would not be very virtous about it.

Edit: Actually didn't we have a thread like this, but with a quiz you could take?

YOU LITTLE FUCKER YOU'RE GOING TO BURN FOR ETERNITY IN THE FIERY PITS OF HELL, EATING HOT COALS AND HAVING YOUR GENITALIA SLICED INTO SHREDS BY THE BLADED VAGINAS OF SATAN'S DAUGHTER

Just for people to get an insight in what those crazy ancient Christians really believed - this is the kind of stuff that was meant to keep them in line. Also a bit of fun - I knew I laughed when I saw what would have been in store for me. :p

Oops, that's a biggie to Dante I'm afraid - that Sin would place you with the Fraudulent, all the way in the eighth circle, and in the tenth Malebolge with the Falsifiers. Here you are in permanent affliction of hundreds of painful and necrotic diseases, which represent the principles of your lies being the disease of society.

...Maybe a bit harsh for homework, but that's ancient Christianity for you. :p

:

() I do not believe. That right there is probably my number 1 sin, in regards to christianity. Even if I did believe I would not be very virtous about it.

Simply 'not believing' in life sends you only to the first circle if you led a virtuous life. Limbo houses all those who were not Christian, but good people nonetheless. The place is a little like the Asphodel Meadows mentioned by MoxCo, and is overall quite pleasant, and includes a nice garden and a great castle. There is no punishment here except for the entrapment itself, and you are free to talk with the others, which would include Homer, Cicero and Caesar - certainly all people I'd like to meet, and probably the circle I'd end up in... maybe.

If I'd have to spend all my time in Heaven praying and extolling my faith, I think I'd rather go to Purgatory.

Well, after your time in Purgatory is complete, you go to Heaven. The key to getting into Purgatory when you're well on your way to Hell is through repentance. This is why a lot of people repented on their deathbed. An episode of Blackadder comes to mind, where the King gives all his money to the papracy rather than the landowners, because the priest scares him into it - yes, the church got protection money from kings. :)

The pope is an extortionist!

My sins are none of your concern and only God should know them. And bloody hell have I no doubt committed a lot of sin.

There are many iterations of Hell from Allighieri's to Barlowe's I don't think any human knows what hell might be only that it is eternal torment beyond anything we can comprehend. I doubt very much that Hell is as Dante predicted it since science tells us that there is a big ball of molten rock at the core of the Earth. Heh, nevertheless I still believe it's out there somewhere.

If however Dante's predictions are remotely true I would at least like to end up on the shores of Purgatory. Although more likely Purgatory is but a temporary state while we await news of our judgement.

Quite a lot of popes are in the eighth circle for just that, according to Dante. ;)

That's a lot of people, every global mega corporation executive, the Papacy (of course we know the Vatican is one of the biggest most profitable businesses in the entire world) hell most governments as well.

We can take Dante's work as a moral example but don't take any of it without a pinch of salt Goresplatter. =)

Limbo sounds pretty good to be honest. But not a likely place for me to end up in. I think more the sixth is for me.

Heresy? Are you of a religion other than Christianity?

Careful there, buddy - don't wanna end up in an ever-burning tomb if you're wrong, do you? ;)

Heresy is the belief contrary to orthodoxy of the church. You don't just have to be of another religion. I could be classified as a heretic for not believing in most of the Old Testament and for not going to Church.

The only thing is, in this book there's a clear distinction between those who simply 'aren't Christian', and those who are heretical or deny God in their hearts. Whatever the Hell that's meant to mean. :p

i have commited a sin by being an epic fail. where do i go, oh wise oen

What if I led a pretty wholesome, charitable, good life without accepting Christ as my savior. Where would I go?

Lucifer stuffs you up his asshole and shits you out repeatedly, after eating nothing but Doner Kebabs for over two thousand years.

Virtuous none-Christians go to Limbo, which is a fairly happy place without punishment... just not quite as nice as Heaven. Mentioned it earlier in the thread I think! :)

The bottom rung of Earthly paradise, I believe Plato and Socrates went there. I think...you may also reach the top of the Purgatory Mountain and enter Paradisio.

Where do I go if all my sins have been for parody purposes only? Is that covered under Fair Use?

I've lied, cheated, stolen. But I think the carnal sins I've committed are some of my best work. If there is a God, and he's as much of a bastard as they say, I'm definitely going to hell. I'm pretty sure I'll see you all there though.

Dante was such a stupid conceited fuck thinking Brutus and Cassius's betrayel came anywhere near to matching that of Judas's.

I'm astounded anyone pious enough to believe Dante's fairytale ever realized they were passively commiting herasy by giving Julius Ceaser the same status as Jesus.

I think the idea was that either Dante needed someone famous to fill the gaps or the sin is not picking between the status of who killed who. Needless to say it is I believe little more than a fictitious account he never meant to be believed, as is Paradise Lost.