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-   -   You're My Whole Oddworld (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=19524)

Dixanadu 08-21-2010 10:48 PM
You're My Whole Oddworld
 
I got bored.

****

A few years after Abe and Munch blew the fuck out of that UFO, Munch raised his stupid looking kids in a straw hut in the middle of the woods. Only two survived, because only Munch told them that land mines were not edible. Anywho, Munch shared the hut with Abe and Alf, who'd go out every night, get drunk, and come home to beat the shit out of Munch for the lulz.

In this instance, Munch sat in what I assume is a closet of some kind, which hung Abe's skidmark-ridden loin cloths. He was huddling his two children, Chew and Suck, since Gabbits have a stupid nomenclature system. They were hiding because Abe and Alf came back.

"Where's them stupid fishes?" Alf said, stumbling over an ironing board. Abe lay on the couch and opened a can of Oddweiser and said in his Abe's Oddysee style, "I DUNNO," doing the stupid fucking arms thing too, and miraculously not spilling his damn beer.

Alf looked for the one legged freaks but found epic Scrab/Paramite porn. So he went into the shitter and did his business. Meanwhile, Abe got bored and decided to punch the wall because he's a hard man. Then Munch burped.

"I KNOW YOU'RE IN HERE, YOU SYPHILIS INFECTED CUM BUBBLE." Abe shouted, looking around. He heard a small "NO U" from the closet. He kicked the door in and found the Gabbits huddling together.
"I found you." Abe said. Munch did a stupid scream, and Abe punched him for it for great justice.

A few hours later, Abe sobered up and went cave dwelling with Chew. Munch checked his Facebook page only to discover Alf had deleted him as a friend. But he found a lonely bull on FarmVille so it was okay!!

Suck, meanwhile, was doing what he did best in the bathroom with Alf.

Then Stranger randomly fucking showed up with pizza but no one answered the door because Stranger is a hairy bastard.

The End.

GABBITS OWN 08-21-2010 11:22 PM
:
()
I got bored.

****

A few years after Abe and Munch blew the fuck out of that UFO, Munch raised his stupid looking kids in a straw hut in the middle of the woods. Only two survived, because only Munch told them that land mines were not edible. Anywho, Munch shared the hut with Abe and Alf, who'd go out every night, get drunk, and come home to beat the shit out of Munch for the lulz.

In this instance, Munch sat in what I assume is a closet of some kind, which hung Abe's skidmark-ridden loin cloths. He was huddling his two children, Chew and Suck, since Gabbits have a stupid nomenclature system. They were hiding because Abe and Alf came back.

"Where's them stupid fishes?" Alf said, stumbling over an ironing board. Abe lay on the couch and opened a can of Oddweiser and said in his Abe's Oddysee style, "I DUNNO," doing the stupid fucking arms thing too, and miraculously not spilling his damn beer.

Alf looked for the one legged freaks but found epic Scrab/Paramite porn. So he went into the shitter and did his business. Meanwhile, Abe got bored and decided to punch the wall because he's a hard man. Then Munch burped.

"I KNOW YOU'RE IN HERE, YOU SYPHILIS INFECTED CUM BUBBLE." Abe shouted, looking around. He heard a small "NO U" from the closet. He kicked the door in and found the Gabbits huddling together.
"I found you." Abe said. Munch did a stupid scream, and Abe punched him for it for great justice.

A few hours later, Abe sobered up and went cave dwelling with Chew. Munch checked his Facebook page only to discover Alf had deleted him as a friend. But he found a lonely bull on FarmVille so it was okay!!

Suck, meanwhile, was doing what he did best in the bathroom with Alf.

Then Stranger randomly fucking showed up with pizza but no one answered the door because Stranger is a hairy bastard.

The End.
This is impressive, I like it.

Ridg3 08-22-2010 02:30 AM
I cried with glory!

GABBITS OWN 08-22-2010 02:32 AM
:
()
I cried with glory!
I cried with pride.

Dixanadu 08-22-2010 02:40 AM
I may continue if inspiration pokes me in the ass again.

STM 08-22-2010 03:54 AM
Freaking amazing, these messed up stories are quickly inspiring me to make my own.

Splat 08-22-2010 06:19 AM
:
1. Do not post distasteful material
The aim of the fancorner is for everyone to enjoy themselves, sharing their contributions to the great Oddworld universe. Please use discretion when posting things that others may find disturbing, such as gore, taboo subjects, bad language and racism. These topics may crop up, particularly in stories, but please handle them sensitively. If you are going to post any material that you know others may find disturbing, please post a warning first (eg. “This chapter contains gory scenes that might disturb some people.”)


2. Do not post pornographic material
Pornography is stuff made specifically for sexual reasons. There is such a thing as tasteful nudity (see the art of Vanilla Killah for example) which is acceptable, and sometimes nudity happens in stories, but don’t take this as an excuse to post just anything. Please be sensible in what you post.


4. Ensure that what you are posting is worth posting
If you read the little description under the big 'Fan Corner' sign on the front page, you'll see this forum is for the posting of two things: Art and Literature. Things falling under these catergories include:

Art
Literature

Art can include fan-games, videos and other things. But please, please, before posting, stop and ask yourself "Is this art and/or literature, or is it just stupid rubbish I made due to sleep deprivation?" If the answer is not 'art and/or literature' please refrain from posting.
It was mildly amusing to start with. Now it is not funny at all; it is old. And frankly you've gone too far. This is not acceptable and considering my FC mod predecessor, Al the Vykker, used to delete stories simply for not having plots, I don't see anything wrong with me refusing to tolerate something even worse.

Dix, you're officially warned, which is one step from an infraction.

STM, don't.