The Obscure Game Awards
Have you ever been playing a game and thought something along the lines of: 'If there was an award for [blank], this would win'? Well, this is the thread for nominating awards you won't find in Golden Joystick. Post a category, people nominate games, discuss. It's that simple. No prizes, no voting, just a good old-fashioned discussion. So, without further ado:
Best Guide A lot of games introduce a character who gives tips and shows you how to play the game. Only a few of them make them good characters. I'd say Ford Kruller (Psychonauts) OR GLaDOS (Portal) OR The Advisor (Dungeon Keeper). Most Punchable Guide Of course, some are just patronising and get in the way. I'd say Murfy (Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc). Best Inconsequential Characters They have no effect on the plot, but that doesn't stop everybody loving them. When developers put effort into creating a background cast of walk-ons, it creates a much richer experience. I'd say the Whispering Rock campers (Psychonauts) (I'm sure Leto will be spitting out his coffee because I didn't mention Jiub). Most Disturbing Sound Effect Some noises, even if they are not that scary, seem to drill right into your frontal lobe. I'd say the 'Aaa-aa-a-a-a-a-a' Darwinian scream (Darwinia) OR the whispers of the Nightmares in Milla's Room (Psychonauts). Best Minigames in the Linear Progression of a Game If you've been struggling through tough levels, nothing matches the joy of playing a simple but satisfying minigame, providing a fun break between standard action. I'd say the Funkyboarding, snowboarding, swimming, shoe-driving, missile-commanding, leg-stomping, cannon-firing, whack-a-mole-ing, waterfall-climbing, sniper-dodging, jetbike-flying might of Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc. Game Most Played for Bragging Rights We've all done it. We've all played a game, not because we thought it would be good, but because it would allow us to preach to everyone else how they were ignoring overlooked developers and how we were fighting The Man. I'd say Darwinia OR Psychonauts. |
Worst Game in a Great Series
I would have to say Destroy All Humans: Big Willy Unleashed. Too many dick jokes, a shit story and shit graphics. Or Munch's Oddysee. Shittest Bad Guy Amanda from Tomb Raider: Ledgend. Mainly becasue her whole reason for hating Lara is that she didn't try and find her, despite Lara thing she drowned and got crushed by rocks. |
Most Punchable Guide
I can't believe you wouldn't say the Shaman from Munch's Oddysee. Goddamn I hated that guy. Half the time I would skip his dialogue even before I found out what my goal was in a level. |
Most Intriguing Hero:
Pacman. Where did he come from? What exactly is his mission, apart from ridding the Maze from those multi-coloured ghosts that just reappear anyway? How did he lose his hair? |
Most Disturbing Sound Effect
probably the ambience in the abandoned mental institution in The Suffering. i always remember hearing a baby crying through the walls. also the sound of the Marksman monster from the same game, usually because you hear them aim their rifles at you before you actually see them. |
Most round disk award
The Jade Cocoon disk was the most round indeed, the rest of them are slightly ovalated. The Character that makes you think award General Custer from Custer's Revenge...I mean why would he be in the middle of a fight with the Native Americans...naked and be boning an equally naked female Native American. |
Most Testicles Award
The Krogan from Mass Effect. Most Cross-dressers in one game Soul Caliber 4. I shit you not, all the male characters have thongs. |
Most sexist FPS
STALKER series. Seriously, there's no female stalkers. It's a radioactive sausagefest |
Most Saluteable Theme Song
Worms. I inexplicably find that war march more inspiring than any national anthem. |
Best guide
Premier Anatoly Cherdenko (Red Alert 3) What's better than HD FMV mission briefings? The latter starring Tim Curry. |
Most wanted game frachise to return
Oddworld and Rayman Sexist Game Character Zero Suit Samus from SSBB or Alyx from Half-life 2 Most Wanted New Character in Brawl Megaman Most Annoying Franchise Sonic Worst Voice Acting Sonic Adventure 2 for Dreamcast Best Voice Acting Team Fortress 2 The Character i would put a bullet into his/hers Head Ness (Earthbound), Lucas (Earthbound), Sonic and the New Spyro from Legend of Spyro Most Wanted game Pokemon Heartgold/Soulsilver (1 day to go!!!)Portal 2, Half-Life 2 Episode 3, Oddworld: The Oddbox |
Worst Voice Acting
Limbo of the Lost Best Voice Acting Day of the Tenatcle... maybe. Probably Psychonauts. |
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Best Minigames in the Linear Progression of a Game
Hacking Minigame in Ratchet and Clank: Up your Arsenal. |
Most Holy FUCK WHAT WAS THAT SHIT:
Bayonetta |
Coolest Game Mascot
Pip Boy - Fallout series |
Game That Will Turn You Into A Sex Addict
Wii Fit. |
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Most Frustrating Platforming Sequence
Psychonauts - The Meat Circus slide of death. Most Ridiculous Number Of Secret Areas AKA Most Frustrating Game For 100% Completion Obsessives Rayman 3: Hoodlum Havoc. Just fucking play it. It's insane. Some of the secret entrances you can't even see. |
Rayman 3 was a pain in the arse. The first time I finished it, I managed to open up the last sub-game, and it was great fun. I haven't been able to do it since, though.
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Which one's that? The jetbike flying one?
I remember for ages that was the only minigame I could complete. I managed to unlock it before I got to the jetbike section in the main game though, which was odd. |
No, the very last one is where you play as that lanky bastard, and you have to kill all of the hoodlums in the area. I could never get to it again. I'll have to give it another try when I'm not busy.
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Hm, never got that one. They're unlocked by points, so just replay sections you're good at until you've got enough. If you haven't got all the Murfy smiley stamps, replay those. And try and find more secret areas.
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Most unsettlingly comedic death scene:
Umineko No Naku Kori Ni. First she gets tossed into the air and dies in impact with the ground, then she gets crushed to death by the air pressure in a bottomless ocean of jelly, then she has a mountain of cake land on her, then she gets transformed into a butterfly and eaten by a spider, then the spider gets transformed to human size and eats her, then she's thrown into a sea of boiling chocolate, then she's thrown into a huge oven and then she gets her heart pierced by a foot long stake. |
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According to Wikipedia, it means 'When the Seagulls Cry'.
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Correct. It's because the translation is only semi-official.
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Off topic for a second, does anyone know a game that gets the final boss battle exactly right? I can't think of a single one from since games became 3D.
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I liked the Wind Waker finale better. I just plain like Wind Waker better.
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