Swiss Man Fights off Lunatic Ninja
 

Lol. Read this.

WHEN a dark intruder smashed through his bedroom window and repeatedly bounced on his bed in an upmarket suburb of Canberra, Beat Ettlin was initially relieved to discover it was a kangaroo.

"My initial thought when I was half awake was: it's a lunatic ninja coming through the window," the 42-year-old said today.

"It seems about as likely as a kangaroo breaking in."

But his relief was short-lived. Moments later, he heard his 10-year-old son Leighton Beman scream from bed: "There's a 'roo in my room!"

"I thought: This can be really dangerous for the whole family now," Ettlin said.

The extraordinary ordeal for the family of four began on Sunday at 2am in their house in the Canberra suburb of Garran.

Ettlin, a chef originally from the Swiss city of Stans, wrestled the thrashing and bleeding 40kg marsupial out the front door.

"I had just my Bonds undies on. I felt vulnerable," he said, referring to a popular Australian underwear brand.

The kangaroo, which Ettlin said was around his height, 5 foot 9 inches (176 centimeters), left a trail of blood through the house and claw gouges in the wooden frame of his bed.

Ettlin, who was left wearing just his shredded underpants and with scratch marks on his leg and buttocks, described himself as "lucky."

The kangaroo vanished into a nearby forest from where it likely came. The family reported the intrusion to police and to wildlife authorities.

The animal hopped a fence to reach the family's backyard. The family suspects it felt trapped and tried to escape the yard through the bedroom window which is about 1.5m (5 feet) above the ground. It was likely cut by the broken glass.

Kangaroos rarely harm humans, but when they do, it is usually because they feel cornered. They have been known to disembowel people with the claws of their powerful hind legs.

Although it had been a dangerous and harrowing experience, Ettlin's wife could see a funny side to the family's unusual predicament.

"I think he's a hero: a hero in Bonds undies," Verity Beman, 39, said of her husband.

Here:http://www.news.com.au/couriermail/s...42-952,00.html

This was on Geekologie ages ago.

Try to stay atleast two steps behind, hm?

It was only on Good News Week lastnight.

I believe we were promised lunatic ninjas?

May this be a lesson to you: GNW is recorded weeks in advance.

Also is scripted.

Also is recorded twice; so they know all the answers the second time round.

But feel free to watch it anyway.

What? Are you certain?

Alcar...

Probably, on the show I was on they did some parts about up to ten times to make it look perfect. We had to pretend to be just as excited by winning three times.

I know it was true when they were originally recording the show in the late '90's. I presume it is still done the same way now.

Haven't you ever wondered how they could guess the news story from such obscure clues?

I have wondered about some questions, but for the most part I didn't think they were that difficult to guess.

Alcar...

I hope they don't do that on Spicks and Specks. If so I have nothing to live for.

Apparently not. I read an article last year that pointed out that, unlike Never Mind The Buzzcocks, they never know the answers and they don't record five times as much footage as goes to air.

Is it just me or have I ended up doing precisely what I criticised Moxco for doing? No more Australian-exclusive TV discussion!

Thank god. I know. We have an 'Australian Discussion' Forum in OTD.

What? Is this Australia’s own version of Never Mind the Buzzcocks, because it never seems rerecorded to me.

I wondered about that. I was about to ask, but then I wondered whether Never Mind the Buzzcocks was actually a British version of something Australian. Not wanting to sound foolish, I did some research, then realised that I might as well answer my original question the same way.

I hate it when my thought processes lead me to logical conclusions through the most illogical pathway.


Anyway, my research indicates that Spicks and Specks is the Australian version of Never Mind the Buzzcocks, and that at the end of a Buzzcocks show they take retakes of certain scenes that did not come out well enough on camera. Essentially, retakes of prior add-libs.

Almost all comedy shows do that. I know QI does for one.

That’s what I’d assumed about Buzzcocks already. HIGNFY does the same, but it’s hardly dishonestly giving the contestants the right answers before they film, which it what the accusation sounds like. Hell, they even show some of the cut takes at the end or in the less-abridged airings if they’re funny enough.

Sorry if I was not clear enough. From what I've heard Buzzcocks contestants do not know the answers to the questions. But they record five times as much footage as goes to air and only cherrypick the best bits.

As compared to Spicks & Specks, which has a more rigidly defined structure and edits out very little.

I'm just giggling about the word 'Buzzcocks'.

The Buzzcocks were a band.

Fact.

Phill Jupitus is huge.

Fact.

The idea of linguistic, scientific and creative progression makes facts fiction.

Paradox.

So wait... were there two kangaroos? What happened to the one in his son's bedroom? Was that the same one, and when it originally jumped on his bed did he just think "Ah, I'll deal with it in the morning."?

Does philosophy do that on purpose?

When understanding this you realize that the only cure for Post-Modernism is the incurable illness of Romanticism.

Hence me.

Swiss Ninja fights off Lunatic Man.