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-   -   'Twas The Night Before Christmas' (Official X-mas/New Year Thread) (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=13120)

Shrink 12-16-2005 05:31 PM

'Twas The Night Before Christmas' (Official X-mas/New Year Thread)
 
Twas the Night Before Christmas,
And all through the forums,
No one was posting!
Nor were they playing their games!
The Mods had prepared their Ban Guns with Care,
Ready to tackle any problem that might arise there.

But alas, what is a good mod to do,
When all the forumers have gone to Timbuktu?
With no one to post,
And no one to spam,
This little disaster,
Was to be worse than ruining the Holiday Ham!
So a plot was made,
A plan was hatched,
A sleigh ride was to be planned,
With staff attached!

Out of the thickness of night,
One could hear the coming fright!
It was, in fact,
A sleigh full of Mods,
Ready for action,
Glances meeting with nods.
Rich was there, toting a new holiday hat,
Which said, “Everyone’s Favorite Mod…Beat that!”
Alcar was practicing his brand new dance,
But this new jig left them all in a trance.
For you see no matter how the man stepped,
Control of the sleigh was harder to be kept.
As the sleigh fell rapidly to the ground,
The fall was quickly stopped, and all looked around.
It was Searex, the global mod, whichever you like,
Using his powers easy as a bike!
Quickly he carried the staff to a safe location,
Where they took off, on their staff transportation.

Now during all of this fuss,
One staffer never did start to cuss,
It was Xavier, who calmly began to say,
“Alcar, do that again, and I’ll knock you off this sleigh.”
Alcar looked sad, But Xavier quickly grinned.
“Just kidding old pal, friends to the end!”

After the two heartwarmingly embraced,
They got back to the mission; there were still forumers to trace!
Al the Vykker soon said, while leading the sleigh,
“One question is puzzling me this day,
Where oh where could those forumers have gone?
No one should be gone this long!”
“Wait I have an Idea!”
Said a voice in the sleigh’s toy rack,
It was AbeBabe, and by odd, she had come back!
For you see a long time, deep in the past,
AbeBabe had left us, though not quite the last.
This sudden bit of exciting news,
Left everyone ready to begin the task anew!
Of course AbeBabe’s idea was never really told,
But, who cares? AbeBabe’s ideas tend to get old.

It was then that Alpha had something to say,
“Folks, I have a plan to get some forumers today.
You see, we’ve been forgetting forumers of old,
They were great, and now they come with mold!”
So off the team went, across the USA,
Getting the first round of the oldies,
That would help them this day.
The first stop was obvious,
No one would ever compare,
To what they found in some state or other,
For, ParamiteAbe is there!
So he was picked up,
Placed in Santa SeaRex’s Toy Sack,
And told to keep patient,
Soon his oldie friends would be back!
The next stop was to a strange lay-by,
To pick up Mr. Oddguy;
First caught in a net,
Then placed in a cage,
He was finally corralled,
By the whole staff’s rage.
Once under control he was quite friendly,
He even sang them a song, a beautiful medley.
Then the group traveled to the far Pole,
(Quite a chilly place, chilly and cold!)
To a land far away from the Oddworld ensemble,
To capture and tame the one called Disgruntled.
But one must pose this simple question:
As to its answer, we are all open to suggestion.
“As for the arctic being so cold and such,
How can a cold Intern flame so much?”

Yet, while they were up at the pole they saw another sleigh passing by.
It held a man in a red suit… Oh well, SeaRex shot it out of the sky!
His new and improved Ban Gun, as an admin member,
Lets him ban things, and make you remember!
So maybe shooting down Saint Nick wasn’t the best possible move,
But, hey, Father Christmas was foiling Alcar’s new groove.
While Alcar tried this new and improved dance,
Which involved some odd removal of his pants,

The rest of the gang moved on from town to town,
Gathering oldies from all around!
Soon they had a massive troop,
To unleash on the forum, to end its droop!
Yet, they had one slight flaw in their plan:
None of them were willing to spam.
And to make matters worse there was but one slot left in the sleigh!
This could ruin the events of the whole day!

How on earth could one forumer gather enough posts?
To revive the forum, to save its ghost?!
Then, another idea came to AbeBabe,
But this time, everyone stopped their charade.
“I have a plan for this evening you see,
Let’s go get the hobo, he’ll post times three!”
So off they went, to retake this one,
Who had left for two weeks, but remained quite quite the Fonz.
So they brought him back, and with the help of the oldies.
The forums were saved! No help from their ‘moldies’

To celebrate, they all shared some Christmas Cheer,
Or Hanukah, Or Kwanzaa, or Ramadan, whichever you celebrate this year.
But this little party quickly became unruly,
When they had some eggnog, provided by one duly.
And so ended this round of holiday fun,
Surely a blast for everyone.

Yet, there is something we all should remember:
A memory to store in your heart this December.
Whenever you are flying around in your sleigh,
(Especially if it is prior to Christmas day),
You should look around, go ahead, and take a glance,
And make sure to remind the Alcar not to dance.

used:) 12-16-2005 05:37 PM

Ehl Oh Ehl. I was actually thinking of doing something like this for Christmas. Kudosness!

Abe16 12-16-2005 05:58 PM

Clever and funny, :) that was good.

Leto 12-16-2005 07:16 PM

I lol'd. :D

SeaRex 12-16-2005 07:28 PM

"I effin' shot Santa out of the sky"/10.

That's pretty good. Probably a 9.5 or something. XD

This is awesome. It shall be merged into the official X-mas/New Year's thread (once I make it... tomorrow... or something).

Havoc 12-17-2005 01:29 AM

Haha, nice one! Kudos to you!

Xavier 12-17-2005 01:53 AM

realy well done... uber kudos to you

dripik 12-17-2005 02:40 AM

Great work! I like it.

Yeah, the return of the old members would mean a lot to the Forums' activity.

SeaRex 12-17-2005 07:26 AM

*Mod powers... activate!*

Anyway, this is now THE Christmas thread. I'm already in that Christmas mood, because my mother's side of the family is insane and celebrating Christmas today.

So... what are you guys asking for? Got something crazy on your list? How about giving? Getting anything special for someone this year?

used:) 12-17-2005 07:32 AM

I have virtually no money to buy presents this year. I spent all of it over the summer buying CD's and games. But i am giving a DVD of one of one of my band competetions to my little brothers.

And my mom is giving them little kid toys even though the oldest is in sixth grade. I feel kind of dumb giving them those gifts under my name, seeing as how I know what I would want in sixth grade. Life goes on I suppose. A for my girlfriend, there's just simply not enough Gabe to go around. :p

What makes me kinda depressed is how my mother is getting surgery on her wrists and will be drugged up on morhpine the enitre holiday sleeping on the couch. No tree or anything. And someone could easily rob our house or murder her, eee the possibilities. I still have to scroung up some kind of a gift for her. I will be in Boston anyhow for Christmas this year, just hope my flight doesn't end up like it did on Nip Tuck last night. Oy.

metroixer 12-17-2005 09:09 AM

10/10 baby. I love it :D! Anyway I have.....Absolutely nothing on my list. Iam serious. This has been a slow Xmas holiday don't you think?

MojoMan220 12-17-2005 12:43 PM

I laughed, I cried, I wet my pants!

Cheers!


As of right now I have no plans for the holidays... and thank God! These last few weeks have been so tiring, so I'm just happy not to have school. I'll be getting an acoustic guitar for Christmas, and that's all I really want.

This thread makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Icarus 12-20-2005 05:10 AM

:

Twas the Night Before Christmas,
And all through the forums,
No one was posting!
Nor were they playing their games!
The Mods had prepared their Ban Guns with Care,
Ready to tackle any problem that might arise there.

But alas, what is a good mod to do,
When all the forumers have gone to Timbuktu?
With no one to post,
And no one to spam,
This little disaster,
Was to be worse than ruining the Holiday Ham!
So a plot was made,
A plan was hatched,
A sleigh ride was to be planned,
With staff attached!

Out of the thickness of night,
One could hear the coming fright!
It was, in fact,
A sleigh full of Mods,
Ready for action,
Glances meeting with nods.
Rich was there, toting a new holiday hat,
Which said, “Everyone’s Favorite Mod…Beat that!”
Alcar was practicing his brand new dance,
But this new jig left them all in a trance.
For you see no matter how the man stepped,
Control of the sleigh was harder to be kept.
As the sleigh fell rapidly to the ground,
The fall was quickly stopped, and all looked around.
It was Searex, the global mod, whichever you like,
Using his powers easy as a bike!
Quickly he carried the staff to a safe location,
Where they took off, on their staff transportation.

Now during all of this fuss,
One staffer never did start to cuss,
It was Xavier, who calmly began to say,
“Alcar, do that again, and I’ll knock you off this sleigh.”
Alcar looked sad, But Xavier quickly grinned.
“Just kidding old pal, friends to the end!”

After the two heartwarmingly embraced,
They got back to the mission; there were still forumers to trace!
Al the Vykker soon said, while leading the sleigh,
“One question is puzzling me this day,
Where oh where could those forumers have gone?
No one should be gone this long!”
“Wait I have an Idea!”
Said a voice in the sleigh’s toy rack,
It was AbeBabe, and by odd, she had come back!
For you see a long time, deep in the past,
AbeBabe had left us, though not quite the last.
This sudden bit of exciting news,
Left everyone ready to begin the task anew!
Of course AbeBabe’s idea was never really told,
But, who cares? AbeBabe’s ideas tend to get old.

It was then that Alpha had something to say,
“Folks, I have a plan to get some forumers today.
You see, we’ve been forgetting forumers of old,
They were great, and now they come with mold!”
So off the team went, across the USA,
Getting the first round of the oldies,
That would help them this day.
The first stop was obvious,
No one would ever compare,
To what they found in some state or other,
For, ParamiteAbe is there!
So he was picked up,
Placed in Santa SeaRex’s Toy Sack,
And told to keep patient,
Soon his oldie friends would be back!
The next stop was to a strange lay-by,
To pick up Mr. Oddguy;
First caught in a net,
Then placed in a cage,
He was finally corralled,
By the whole staff’s rage.
Once under control he was quite friendly,
He even sang them a song, a beautiful medley.
Then the group traveled to the far Pole,
(Quite a chilly place, chilly and cold!)
To a land far away from the Oddworld ensemble,
To capture and tame the one called Disgruntled.
But one must pose this simple question:
As to its answer, we are all open to suggestion.
“As for the arctic being so cold and such,
How can a cold Intern flame so much?”

Yet, while they were up at the pole they saw another sleigh passing by.
It held a man in a red suit… Oh well, SeaRex shot it out of the sky!
His new and improved Ban Gun, as an admin member,
Lets him ban things, and make you remember!
So maybe shooting down Saint Nick wasn’t the best possible move,
But, hey, Father Christmas was foiling Alcar’s new groove.
While Alcar tried this new and improved dance,
Which involved some odd removal of his pants,

The rest of the gang moved on from town to town,
Gathering oldies from all around!
Soon they had a massive troop,
To unleash on the forum, to end its droop!
Yet, they had one slight flaw in their plan:
None of them were willing to spam.
And to make matters worse there was but one slot left in the sleigh!
This could ruin the events of the whole day!

How on earth could one forumer gather enough posts?
To revive the forum, to save its ghost?!
Then, another idea came to AbeBabe,
But this time, everyone stopped their charade.
“I have a plan for this evening you see,
Let’s go get the hobo, he’ll post times three!”
So off they went, to retake this one,
Who had left for two weeks, but remained quite quite the Fonz.
So they brought him back, and with the help of the oldies.
The forums were saved! No help from their ‘moldies’

To celebrate, they all shared some Christmas Cheer,
Or Hanukah, Or Kwanzaa, or Ramadan, whichever you celebrate this year.
But this little party quickly became unruly,
When they had some eggnog, provided by one duly.
And so ended this round of holiday fun,
Surely a blast for everyone.

Yet, there is something we all should remember:
A memory to store in your heart this December.
Whenever you are flying around in your sleigh,
(Especially if it is prior to Christmas day),
You should look around, go ahead, and take a glance,
And make sure to remind the Alcar not to dance.


didn't bring back my holiday spirit but i love it, good job....

metroixer 12-20-2005 05:44 AM

New song! *ahem*

Dashing through the forums. In a one horse open mod. the hoarsing around still exists. As long as we keep posting!....Having a good time. In front of the computer screen. Oh how great it would be if we sang a forum song!

Oh Alcar bells! Alcar bells! Admin all the way! Oh how funny it is to watch Closing topics in his sleigh hey! Seareax bells! Searex bells! Searex all the way! The global moderator who chooses to mod the poor fool who pisses him off!

Okay so that wasen't so good, but hey. I was in the mood.....Does anyone have their Xmas tree up yet?

Havoc 12-20-2005 05:57 AM

OMG LOL, I tried to sing that and it sounds sooo stupid, also funny tho! :P.

metroixer 12-20-2005 06:05 AM

I know. It sounded so good when I was tyoing it. Now it's all blah blah.

Cullen Heath 12-20-2005 06:10 AM

Haha, Thats awesome!
It was so offtune that it was great fun!


Yes I puy up my tree on DEC 1st. I wont let my family put it up before dec but im such a Christmas freak that I do it as soon as dec comes.

Rex Tirano 12-20-2005 08:01 AM

[Would sound better as Oh Alcar's balls. :p]

That's really good, both of them. Though I pissed myself laughin' at the first.

FTW.

[All I want for Xmas is a piratey wolvo boi ;)]

- Rexy

Abeguy 12-20-2005 06:49 PM

to the tune of we wish you a merry christmas

Oh will people st-op spamming
Oh will people st-op spamming
Oh will people st-op flaming
hell this is random
The mods in the skies
shoot us down like flies
soon we will be no more and the forums will end

But please do not be a brown nose
Oh please do not be a brown nose
I don't care about a red nose
but a brown one, hell no!

yeah, for you christmas celebraters

not any hanukah carols so, ahh well

Seargentbig 12-20-2005 09:56 PM

Oh, man. Mangled carols. Not a sight to see on a full stomach...
Nah, they're all great! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all of you!

Daxter King 12-21-2005 03:42 AM

5/5. Such a funny song. I actually have alot of things on my Christmas list. The one I want the most is probably guitar hero for the ps2.

metroixer 12-21-2005 06:20 AM

Good luck with that Daxter King. Thats a rare game. Anyway nice job abeguy. Better than mine at least. Rexy I also had the biggest temptation to put in Alcar's balls in there. I think i'm glad that I diden't though.

Fuzzle Guy 12-21-2005 12:00 PM

While Members watched their threads by Night

While members watched their threads by night
All seated in front of a screen
The Admin known as Alcar came
And everyone started to scream!

Fear Not, said he for posting threads
Had warped their Crazy mind
I only come to post a message
For you and all mankind

To You on your computer this day
Is born a members lie
For Alcar came to close the thread
Now the Thread has said Goodbye

used:) 12-22-2005 11:43 AM

Tis the season for cliches.

Kimon 12-22-2005 01:00 PM

Dear God, this thread title is appalling! It should read "Official Winter Holiday/New Year Thread." Shrink, you should know better. :|



Hysterical poem, very nicely done. If I have time, I may contribute something of my own.

Nepharski 12-22-2005 01:06 PM

:

"I effin' shot Santa out of the sky"/10.

Gives a whole new meaning to the Christmas "Season."

Oddish 12-22-2005 01:08 PM

That was well done, Shrink. It is nice to have someone getting into the spirit of chirstmas.

Dark Elite_H2 12-22-2005 03:15 PM

Eee, puttin' all the mods in there. Very clever, Shrink!
As fer the mixed up carrols, I can't think of any!
My science teacher made me make up a science-y carrol from a christmas carrol. I made it up from the 12 days of Christmas. It was hard...

Shrink 12-22-2005 03:48 PM

Apparently there aren't many mods left.

Daxter King 12-24-2005 06:52 AM

One more day till Christmas. Merry Christmas and a happy freakin new year everyone!!!!