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-   -   Jacking Off. (And other sexual adventures.) (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=12452)

Statikk HDM 07-10-2005 02:35 PM

Jacking Off. (And other sexual adventures.)
 
Don't you hate it when someone is asked if they masturbate and they say no? Isn't it infuriating? Why are these people so uptight that they just can cop to masturbating? Its ridiculous.
I bring this up because I actually got into a screaming argument with someone over this. He's 18, doesn't have a girlfriend, and spends 9 and a half months out of the year at a boarding school but he said he's never and I mean NEVER done it. I said he was full of shit. He was offended because I called him a liar, etcetera and so forth. Well, this got me to thinking. You know in American Pie 2 where they have the rule of 3. Here is my corollary to that rule
Statikk's Rule of Masturbation
When you ask someone how frequently they do it a week/month/year, have done it in their life time add 1 and multiply that result by 1.5

Rich 07-10-2005 02:41 PM

:

You jack off.
Well duh, who doesn't? :rolleyes:

Alcar 07-10-2005 02:42 PM

I don't like people who lie about it either, because you know it's so obviously true that they do it. However, most people don't have any problem talking about it, or admitting it, or at least, the people I hang with don't.

It's an interesting subject, simply because it leads onto sex. And sex is always interesting. So it makes for good discussions! :p

Alcar...

sligster 07-10-2005 03:28 PM

:

You jack off.
so?

>.>

PerfectKirbyJr 07-10-2005 03:31 PM

And? So what if I do? XD

Kimon 07-10-2005 04:06 PM

Holy moly! EVERYONE masturabates! Except girls... I'm not sure about them...

Any female forum members want to speak up, here? C'mon, I'm interested! :fuzzle:

MojoMan220 07-10-2005 04:08 PM

Girls do it to, I should know, I overheard a conversation.

AquaticAmbi 07-10-2005 04:20 PM

:

Holy moly! EVERYONE masturabates! Except girls... I'm not sure about them...

Any female forum members want to speak up, here? C'mon, I'm interested! :fuzzle:

*Takes a deep breath and raises hand* Gasporz!

Although it's pretty rare compared to guys. At least for me, anyway.

While I don't care for the lying, I think it's far worse when a random person asks someone they don't even know if they do it. I think it's acceptable to lie about it (but better not to answer at all) if you're offended by the person asking. Stupid guys at my school like to embarrass girls by asking about masturbationy habits.

Most girls will say, "No! Eww! That's gross!" I think the majority of them are just too shy to admit it, or if it's from said random boys, they're afraid of simply saying, "It's none of your business" because they fear being made fun of. Or something.

Bottom line: There's absolutely nothing wrong with self-exploration. I believe it's quite healthy.

Kimon 07-10-2005 04:26 PM

:

Girls do it to, I should know, I overheard a conversation.

OmG REELy!? U R tEH smrt!!

:

There's absolutely nothing wrong with self-exploration. I believe it's quite healthy.

*Nods knowingly*

I don't see why it's a must-do for guys, but a taboo for girls (at least girls among guys). Must be a testosterone thing. *shrugs*

Tee-hee! Girls do it too! :blush:

AquaticAmbi 07-10-2005 04:34 PM

Hah, more like a society-induced thing, I think. Guys are supposed to be obsessed with sex and girls are considered slutty if they like sexual pleasure just as much as a guy... or some kind of garbage along those lines.

I do know at least one female friend who never ever does it. I've never asked her why, but I'm sure she's being sincere as we share pretty deep secrety stuffs. I guess she just never feels like it. Plus, she has long nails, and that may not end well. >.O

Kimon 07-10-2005 04:37 PM

:

Hah, more like a society-induced thing, I think. Guys are supposed to be obsessed with sex and girls are considered slutty if they like sexual pleasure just as much as a guy... or some kind of garbage along those lines.

Same as every prejudice, I guess. Whatevah.

:

Plus, she has long nails, and that may not end well.

I can only imagine. Oww-ewww.

Nepharski 07-10-2005 07:00 PM

:

Don't you hate it when someone is asked if they masturbate and they say no? Isn't it infuriating? Why are these people so uptight that they just can cop to masturbating? Its ridiculous.

I'm going to take a, "Leap," here and, "Guess," that not everyone is comfortable with that subject of discussion. Just a hunch...and a fairly acurate one if I say so myself.

Dipstikk 07-10-2005 07:17 PM

*raises hand and waves wildly*

Ooh! Ooh! Pick me! I do it! I do it!

What do you mean by "modesty?" :D

Dino 07-10-2005 07:23 PM

Once upon a time there was a thread where some bright sparks worked out that we all wank, but not all of us admit it. And they all went home and masturbated happily ever after.

The end.

Or is it?

Has anyone considered the possibility that some people just don't wank? I mean, I don't... I find the thought of it to be really unattractive, and I find that sexual desires usually result in me having sex with a person as opposed to my paw, but I get the feeling that you people are just so hung up on the fact that wanking is bad that you feel like less of a decent person whenever you come across someone who says that they do not tenderise the crotch sausage, so you accuse them of lying. o_0 I don't really understand how you can say you accept that masturbating is normal if you feel guilty whenever you encounter someone who doesn't make love to his hand.

Munch's Master 07-11-2005 12:40 AM

Yeah, I do, not constantly, but now and then. So what? Most people do and I don't freak out when others say they don't. If they don't geniunely, that's fine, they might not like it. If they say they don't but do, that's their problem.

:

Stupid guys at my school like to embarrass girls by asking about masturbationy habits.

Exactly the same at my school. I don't ask the girls but a couple of d!ckheads do and, I won't say anymore.

Hobo 07-11-2005 12:45 AM

My girl claims she's never tried it, which i do find hard to believe , but again could well be true. Long nails again.

A stupidly large amount of men do it, and so i don't understand why it's deemed taboo (even if it is a lesser taboo than that of female masturbation) Bah. Society blows.

sligster 07-11-2005 12:48 AM

o noes!!!11

http://www.forumspile.com/You-Are-Masturbating-Pope.jpg

Munch's Master 07-11-2005 02:03 AM

Lol that's a classic joke pic. Heh, I still laugh each time I see it.

Leeum 07-11-2005 05:10 AM

Oh boy, I go AWOL for a while and come back to queer ass threads like this :p j/k
It's up to people what they want to do with their body, if someone doesn't do it then I don't jip them, they loose out ;)

AquaticAmbi 07-11-2005 07:23 AM

Well, while looking at my User CP, I noticed two things I've overlooked, one which is related to this.

Unrelated: I've left an S out of Tennessee for months in my location.
Related: I have long nails. (See avatar.) They haven't been this long until recently. So yeah, that should give you an idea of how uncommon it is for me. And stuff. Besides, when your significant other lives a couple minutes away, it's not a big deal. :D

Anywho, Stattik, I didn't ask this earlier, but I feel like doing it now: Why does it bother you so much whether people tell the truth or not about? Could Dino's theory be true? I mean, it's really nothing to get in a screaming argument about it.

Rex Tirano 07-11-2005 08:05 AM

My friends never egenerally talk about it, and if it's brought up everyone screams "eww god no!"... Okay so I over exaggerate. But most of my friends deny doing it [apart from my best friends, and we share everything together so... Yeah.]. Which is utter bull... But anyway...

I generally don't masterbate. But that doesn't mean I don't. I just don't really like it unless I'm super horny.

So... Yeah. Good thread. ;)

- Rexy

Statikk HDM 07-11-2005 09:09 AM

Dino: No, its not because I do it so much that I disbelieve people automatically. Hey, if you say you don't like it and you very seldomly do it, fine. But to out and out lie, to say that you've never even done it once is offensive to me. I don't like liars.
It reminds me of a parable that Jesus taught about money. And the end of it goes like this(paraphrase)
"Who can be trusted with small things can be trusted with great things. The converse is also true."
Basically, my stance is that if you lie about small things like speeding or wanking, you probably lie a lot about things that matter.

Rich 07-11-2005 09:16 AM

I wank because I don't have anyone to have sex with and I don't like waking up in a sticky bed. :D
I don't do it too much as that's rather perverted and wrong and it makes you have nasty veins. And it makes me feel guilty afterwards. :p

I don't care if other people wank or not or wether they lie about it. My best friend told me he wanks as he said he woke up after having a wet dream. Not nice.

Esus 07-11-2005 09:16 AM

Yeah, lying is plain offensive.

As I was saying, I've never masturbated ever in my life. I consider it vulgar, ugly and plain dirty, and I will never do it.
Oh yeah, I must be lying because you do it! Your logic is impeccable.

Coolmanbizkit 07-11-2005 09:33 AM

Masturbating is healthy for men because it flushes out the system which can sometimes cause cancer... Or something like that.

Rich 07-11-2005 09:39 AM

:

Masturbating is healthy for men because it flushes out the system which can sometimes cause cancer... Or something like that.
Thats a great way of justifying something vulgar that is done just for your own pleasure. :p

Coolmanbizkit 07-11-2005 09:42 AM

:

Thats a great way of justifying something vulgar that is done just for your own pleasure. :p

Eh? (sorry im a dumbass, I dont really know what vulgar means)

big bro boogie 07-11-2005 09:53 AM

:

I wank because I don't have anyone to have sex with and I don't like waking up in a sticky bed.
I don't do it too much as that's rather perverted and wrong and it makes you have nasty veins. And it makes me feel guilty afterwards.

Why are you me?
(Yeah, I do it too... you're not alone... :p )

:

Masturbating is healthy for men because it flushes out the system which can sometimes cause cancer... Or something like that.

That's true. Read this if you don't believe me.

Kimon 07-11-2005 10:00 AM

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Eh? (sorry im a dumbass, I dont really know what vulgar means)

Rude or gross.

Coolmanbizkit 07-11-2005 10:01 AM

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Rude or gross.

Oh right, Thanks