Ever Riped A Fart In Public
 

OMG a farting topic must be runing out of ideas. Well anyway you ever farted in the middle of public. In school one of the kids riped a huge one after that it was dead silent then everyone started cracking up it was so damn funny. In gym class when we were doing push ups I let a huge one go damn I was blushing after that.

Lindsey, are you sure you're a 13-year-old girl? You sound more like, I dunno, Fat Bastard when he's not being very funny. Sorry, but I calls 'em like I sees 'em.

In answer to your question; no, not that I can remember.

Raisin, do you fancy yourself witty?

You sound more like, I dunno, a 14 year old with a superiority complex. Sorry, but I calls 'em like I sees 'em.

As far as farting in public:

Yeah, I do it as often as possible. People already stare at me because of the way I look, so why not give them a real reason to cringe and turn their heads?

Yeah, I fart in public, got a problem with it? If someone really pisses me off i'll drop my kegs in their garden and do a banging great shit.

Lol! I've farted in public. The worst one was in Maths...

It smelt awful, and I was sitting in front of the boy I fancied >_<

I still can't look him in the eye.....

Well does setting pranks on people count? Because there is nothing as classic as a woopie cushion especially when nobody suspects it. Hehe and you get the best kinds from "Spencers Gifts" or a place near me called "Mr. Funs!":lol:

You had better not have a long lawn PA........

One time during a math test, this kid let out a HOOGE fart. I laughed, I cried, I let one out as well and blamed it on him.


During my trip to Washington DC, I had a big stomach problem and wanted to rip one in a cathedral we toured through. When we got back to the hotel I let go a shit and felt MUCH better.

Yes, I was driving up to my friends house who lives about 50 miles away. I drank three x-tra large slushes at the Gas n' Go that I stopped for gasoline. By the end of the trip, my bladder felt as if it were about to explode, it eventually went numb and I felt dizzy, and with my luck a huge traffic jam appeared out of nowhere. I held that gallon of melted slush in my bladder for 3 hours. When I finally got to his house I ran to the bathroom and went. It felt so good I almost passed out. Better than sex. But a price to pay.

I pass gas whenever I can, and as loud as I can. It sickens the hell out of those around me, but it's better than letting it sit for too long.

Farting usually works best after some Chinese carry out or a Big Mac and fries.

[QUOTE=ferill If someone really pisses me off i'll drop my kegs in their garden and do a banging great shit.[/QUOTE]

Wish I could go shit in this old lade's garden the little asshole called the cops on the 4 of july saying it was to loud outside duh of course its loud out side. when I was 5 (I think) a kid craped his pants in school farting the funny part was the teacher didn't know untill it came out of his pants some of the kids where gathering round it wondering what it was. That was just nasty

Ah yes, the dreaded "Sharting"

I don't know why but that was very funny.

Oohh damn it to hell, DI is back. You know, I would never wish death on someone, but you come very close. Jeez, DI, why didn't you just stay away?

I don't remember ever farting in public, but I have had some bad experiences holding them in. A couple times I've been around people for days on end, unable to allow myself to fart, and I swear they almost forced their way out the wrong way. Felt like I was going to vomit my farts. :sick: Doesn't sound like anyone around here would do that. That's a good thing. I'm way too self-conscious for my own good.

EDIT: Screw you, DI. Speaking of stupid posts, I think that one you just made qualifies as spam.

Stop being such a drama queen.

Either that, or stop making stupid posts. Your choice.

Oh my gawd I heard that term used for the first time in Along Came Polly, I nearly died laughing.

Well I'm a lady, and everyone knows ladies don't fart! Ever! So um yeah...noooo I've never 'broken wind' in public or otherwise! :fuzcool:

Same here! NEVER EVER!

It does get rather stressful though... like when accidentally letting one go during post coital cuddle in bed... usually quite early in a relationship... you just wanna die.

Yet when your beau does them... he laughs and forces your head under the duvet!

Another defining difference of the sexes!

I try not to, but there have been instances when you just can't hold them in, no matter how hard you try.

Once when I was in church as a kid I had to fart and was holding it in. But then I needed to sneeze and the pressure of sneezing made the fart occur at the same time as the sneeze. It was quite embarrassing.

The other time I recall, I was at the footy with my brothers. Behind us were a group of Yobbos drinking their beer, etc. Well again I couldn't hold it, but it came out silent. Although it was really bad smelling. And these guys behind us where all blaming each other saying "you done a footy fart" to their mates and that. It was hard to stop myself from laughing but I wasn't going to own up to it.

Abe Babe...

Yes! I fart in public whenever I can. I find people's reactions rather amusing...

I don't usually. Obviously there has been the odd one slip out over my years, but I never let them make a noise. Most of the time I just hold it in, and I end up feeling really sick because of it.

Thats where I heard it too.

I'm still battling with the fact that 'Ripped' is spelled wrong. Are you asking if they're ripe. Yes. Mine are always ripe.

I believe Lucipher once got a DT for letting out a really bad fart in class that made everyone have to work outside. He just laughed through it all. He is an evil ****er.

Ripping farts in public! Yea, ofcourse, its my daily hobby. I always hold it up and let it go just as I walk out the door... rather funny if you walk down the street on a warm day and you see everyone ste out of the shop for a few seconds :P.

I have just this second farted.......

Funny, I haven't farted in a while...:fuzconf:


Maybe it's my diet change.

I know.. I know... Leave the girl alone though... Bless her!

Mine would be ripe... if I ever had any! Right Fuzzles!? :D

yeah same here

I generally don't fart at all, because I discovered the technique of diffusing gas (which would normally lead to farts) through the lining of my stomach and belly button.

Sorry the "riped" is still slaying me... it really does attract the eye!

is it really that god damn interesting.....

Don't worry you're not crazy. Spelling errors in titles of threads (the one place things should be spelt right) always annoy me, and this one is no different.