A meteor hits your house and I start to kill off your family members one by one.:fuzmad:

I wish I had a lockpick.

Granted! You don't know how to use it.

I wish I could actually wake up when my alarm clock goes off, rather than shutting it off in my sleep.

Granted but you are always tired and get hit by a car on your way to work

I wish I was in oblivion.

Granted, but then the Dark Brotherhood pwns you in your sleep.

I wish I could never ever get hungry or thirsty and retain my weight.

you reatain weight by not excreting and since you dnt knw if ur hungry or thirsty, you die of dehydration.

I REALLY wish i knw wat was in the case in Pulp Fiction!!!!! :P

Granted! You sneak in and open the case! You now know what was inside!

Then the director kills you, because he's the only one that's supposed to know what's inside.

I wish I had a faster computer.

Granted, but it goes so fast, it skids off the desk and crashes into you.

I wish I had a Okapi.

granted.... but since i dnt knw wat that is, you get run over on your way to get sum jaffa cakes frm the shops.

i wish... for.... cheese

Granted but it smells so bad you pass out into a coma and don't wake up
...EVER!

I wish I had the numa numa song as my theme.:p

Wish granted! But then you go to prison because it is such a crap song and as you bend down in the shower to get the soap you dropped you get arse raped by a 20 stone biker who is a fan of that song

I wish Gerard-blaize would spell probably rather than keep using shortened words

Well well well.... I'm hurt.... Wish granted. But then I realise that I must corrupt this wish so i'll go bak to my txt lik way of writing nd all dat. BTW Laser, the word your looking for is "properly" not "probably" :P

I wish I could think of something good to wish for.

you do but i gets corrupted my OANST the worst kind of corruption your imagineation can think of

i wish my homework did its self

Granted but your teachers get suspisous about your perfect homework and soon make you do every peice of homwork again.

I wish I was million zillioner

granted, in the process deeming "zillion" as a real number and ruining centuries of mathmatics.

i wish i wish i didn't kill that fish

The fish is ressurected, and kills you in your sleep with its razor-sharp spines and killer odor.

I wish the Transformers were real...:fuzemb:

granted. but they don't like you.

i wish i had a car with endless enviromentally friendly fuel

(Tch, see what you know...never asked for them to LIKE me, or humainty itself)
Granted, but hell...the animals still don't like you even if you are saving their lives. An eagle comes in to your car, pecking your eyes out, while distracting you from the road, hit a tree, and die a miserable death. ^^
Hell...what do I wish...to hug an Elite? XD

(BTW...

XD Loved that one. Kudos ^^)

Granted! But the Elite hugs you too hard and your eyes pop out.

I wish I had a Hairbrush.

Granted! But the hair brush goes savage, and bites your head off.

A Okapi is a horse like animal, with giraffi horns, cow tail, and zebra stripes on its legs.
I wish I wasnt so darn stupid.

Granted, but you only gain 1 IQ, making a total of 1.

I wish I could do flips and never break my any bone in my body. Also, become more Acrobatic. And my organs and stuff are invunerable too everything. Try corrupting that!

easy:
You are so god-like that the gods themselves are jealous so they send there hitman Jesus to go and send you to hell and since you can feel pain you are tortured till the end of the universe

i wish i had an incorruptable mars bar

Granted! It's so incorruptable, you can't eat it.

I wish I could find my Oddworld disk.

Granted! But you trip and it falls into the fire, goes up in flames, and burns your house down.

I wish I could pass the maths tests.

Granted, but you cheated.

I wish I could RP.

Granted! You RP so well everyone loves your characters, and soon you can't even move them without someone wanting to interact with them. They eventually starve to death because they cant' get to the cafeteria.

I wish I knew where to get an Ethernet cable

you now know but you mix ethernet with ethernol and die of liver faliure

I wish for a sock with 2 batteries in it

Granted. This is a new invention, the iSock, powered by 2 batteries for twice the comfort. But everytime you take a step, you get a small jolt. Heh. Then they blow up and burn your feet, and you fall over, onto a pile of rusty bayonets. Afterwards, the fire brigade comes and sees such a horrible mess they uh...die of shock and afterwards the police arrive and die the same fate and everyone who sees the mess dies and consequently the pile gets bigger and bigger and the entire Earth is destroyed.

I wish for a way too get to that damn house!

Granted, you get inside, and it collapses on top of you.

I wish didn't have such a horrendous cold.

Granted! It's gone. But in removing it from your body you transferred it to other people, making it spread and turning it into the next pandemic.

I wish my socks didn't talk to me.

Granted. They talk only to other people, leaving you lonely and depressed.

I wish these grapes didn't have seeds in them.