Glad you guys all like it and I'm so sorry for making you all wait so long! I've had a lot to do, English, Science and Maths coursework, a Drama examination...

Anyway, as i was saying you've all been waiting ages while a chapter has been formulating itslef in my head and i think I've come up with something quite good. Only one way to find out I guess..


Part 4, the Sacrifice

Chapter 1, Dreams
The chief warrior of the Edakee tribe of the Gopemi forest shuddered in his sleep and woke. After a few seconds he remembered why he’d suddenly woken and why there was a definite sense of dread floating somewhere around his stomach.
He reached a hand to his left and groped around. When his fingers found only empty air he opened his eyes, fear turning to panic. Scrambling round, he stared at the blank earth where last night he’d left the Orb. Then he began looking around frantically for the metallic green ball that meant so much to his people. He spotted it within 10 seconds, lying 2 feet away, resting against the taught animal skin that made up the wall of his easily moveable home.
Cursing his stupidity he reached over and grabbed it. He was in a camp full of mudokons: who was gonna want to steal it? He scooped a handful of sandy earth out of the ground next to his bed and put the Orb inside the indent in the hope it wouldn’t roll away again. He lay back in bed in the hopes of going to sleep again but soon the feeling of dread returned and he suddenly felt very awake and all too aware.
Why was he scared? Was it the curse? Only a few hours ago he was assuring his best friend that the curse was wearing off. Now here he was, terrified… Oh, he was being stupid!
For miles below and around the forest were factories, mines and labs for Odd knew how far. People said you couldn’t stand anywhere, not even in the deepest valleys, without an industrial building being in view. No allies, no help or support for miles. Just miles of empty sands… How long would it take to walk all the way round? He could certainly picture himself going on for at least a year. And it would mean walking right back through the forest into Glucose. Oh yeah, He thought, I’m sure Graham would love that.
So what else could he do? Walk through miles of industrial territory all the while hoping he wouldn’t wander into any sligs, vykker expeditions or fleech farms? That was asking a bit too much. Tomorrow he would be seeing Graham leave and telling the tribe where he was going, what he planned to do when he got there. He imagined his speech, I’m sorry guys, I don’t know how to get through miles of glukkon land carrying the greatest weapon of all time. So how’s this for a plan: we just wait around here, keep hold of the Orb and wait for a miracle… He couldn’t imagine that going down too well.
How about this? Rather than walking through miles of industrial land I’ll just spend a year walking around it all! I’ll just pop back up into Glucose then shall I? Yep, Graham would love that. And walking that distance in these parts of Oddworld really wouldn’t be much better than heading through the glukkons land.
He sat up again. It was no good lying there. The Shaman on the tribe, Edam, was full of (sometimes) useful advice and suddenly one of his usually-ignored philosophising had suddenly battered its way into Barry’s mind: "Where there are problems, there are always solutions. For without solutions, all problems could not exist." Well, it was time to see how useful Edam could be.
Barry undid the toggles holding his tent flap in place and stepped out into the cool night air. Stars glittered overhead and as Barry walked, he picked out several: The Fleeing Scrab, The Watcher on the Wall, the Humped Paramite… Actually doing something helped ease the weight of fear in his stomach and the time passed quickly as he walked towards the largest tent in the clearing, owned by the Shaman.
What with being so close to a large industrial complex and in an area frequently patrolled by sligs, the Edakee tribe had to be careful. Fire was kept at a minimum and were never left burning after the Sun had set (except on the New Day festival). The tribe used tents rather than huts so they could pack up and move the entire "village" in a hurry and leave very few signs that they’d been there at all. They’d slipped up in the past, people had been killed. But time went on, new mudokons joined the tribe and they survived, usually a step ahead of their pursuers. Life was hard but they pulled through.
Barry arrived in front of Edam’s tent and hesitated, not sure whether to step inside. He didn’t want to walk in on the Shaman sleeping.
The decision was spared from him, however, by a voice calling from inside: "Don’t just stand there on the doorstep Barry, come inside. I’m not gonna shout to you through the wall all night."
Barry answered as he undid the tent door and stepped through. "Sorry, I didn’t want to disturb you if you were asleep."
"Of course I wasn’t asleep!" Answered the elderly Shaman sharply, "I’m not about to go to sleep when I’m expecting a guest am I!"
"Expecting…"
The Shaman sighed. "Strange how these things work. I really would have expected Odd to pass the Orb onto someone with some idea of the power it holds. You really no very little of these matters for all your skill with that bow."
Barry cursed himself for not expecting this. Edam could be irritable at the best of times and it being about 1:00 in the morning didn’t help. "Which brings us on to why you’re here," The Shaman continued, "You’re worrying about what’s ahead. I woke before I found out what your problem is however."
Barry glanced around the tent for something to do. It was cluttered up with crates and shelves baring various glass, wood and stone balls, bizarrely shaped pots and vases, ornaments, idols, bottles of Odd knows what. Stings of herbs hung from the support posts giving the room a slightly intoxicating odour. There were crates full of books dotted around the walls, some with contents lying across the floor. In the far corner was a separate section for Edam’s bed so no one could accidentally stumble in on him without his mask on: an ancient taboo said to bring death to both the shaman and the one who saw him. 2 masks hung on the post next to the shaman’s bed. An empty hook was nailed into the post below them, the mask it bore currently on Edam’s face.
Edam seemed to own more stuff than a third of the village put together. Strangely, only 5 mudokons and the Shaman were required to carry it all.
Barry decided to go straight to the point: "Well, you know where I’ve gotta get the Orb too… Miles south, over the Industrial land…"
"Ah, I understand." The shaman said as Barry paused, "Miles of glukkon run country and you don’t know how you’ll cross it alive, let alone carrying the Orb?"
Barry nodded, pleased the Shaman had grasped his problem so well. "Well Barry, I’m afraid I can’t help you."
Barry’s face fell. "But you said where there’s a problem-"
The Shaman held up a hand to stop him. "I am well aware of what I said Barry and I’m please at least one of you listen to me. I said I couldn’t help you but I didn’t was there wasn’t an answer. Go see Jason."
"The new guy?"
"The very same."
Jason had arrived in the village 3 weeks ago after escaping from the factory nearby. Apparently the head of security there, a massive B-B-Slig called Barah, was eager to get his hands on him.
"But he’s only been free for three weeks of his life! How will he help me get across miles of land he’s never even seen?"
"You will find Barry, that even those who no nothing of your problems, may no a solution, and often one you would not expect. Go and find Jason, he should be waking from a nightmare any second now, much like yourself. Don’t doubt the weak Barry, we all have a purpose for which Odd set us in this world. I would hope after your experiences you would no that better than most of us."



And there it is, Chapter on of The Sacrifice!

I JUST GOT AN AWARD FOR THE ODDWORLD FORUM'S BEST WRITER
http://www.oddworldforums.net/showth...733#post191733
I didn't see that one coming! Cheers to who ever voted for me and is reading this! Man, i'm going hyper!

Congratulations on the best writer thing, Splat! You've deserved it.

Cheers searge. I liked that ast chapter... lot of fun writing it...
I updated Amy as well you no, though i only got one reply in a week so no update. :(

I, uh... didn't see Amy until today. Sorry

And only one person to reply here since the last update! Cheers anyway searge. I haven't had much time to write anything over the last few weeks. My exams are imminent! Anyway, I just updated Amy so I'll try and get something done over the next 2 weeks. I'M ON SCHOOL HOLIDAY FOR EASTER! Bare with me searge.

Yeah. Happy easter. We get a five-day long weekend! Hooray!

You only get 5 days off! I get 2 weeks! then again I will be spending a large portion of that revising at gun point :(

Eeeerrrr Splat please can you continue with the story? 'Cause I am stabbing myself with a knife every second! I am dieing And I am..... *Thump*

Yeah, but that was for the easter long weekend. I get two weeks of holiday from first term to second at the end of next week!

I voted for you.

good, good...:dodgy:

At long last I've got it done! Some one give Fuzzleman a bandage, he has a chapter to read!


Chapter 2, If you can’t go over it…
A lamp was on in Jason’s tent when Barry arrived. Occasionally he saw the silhouette of a limb flash on the tent wall but it seemed that Jason was on the further side of the light.
Barry approached the front of the tent and knocked on a wooden plaque hanging over the door. All the tents in the village had one of these, both for greeting and also they had carved into them the owner and the position where they went in the camp, so it was easier to shift and erect them where the owner would be able to remember where they were. Other people, including Edam, had carved messages into them. Edam used his to display the "Philosophy of the Month", the current one being, "There are no happy endings for nothing ever truly ends."
When Barry knocked there was a sudden scuffle within and Jason’s voice called out nervously, "W-who’s there?"
"It’s Barry. The warrior. Edam sent me to talk to you."
"Barry… Edam Greatfeather?"
"Yeah." Barry decided against continuing the conversation through the tent wall so instead stepped inside.
As previously mentioned, Edam Greatfeather owned more stuff than another third of the village put together. So stepping into any other mudokons tent was not like stepping into Edam’s. For one thing Barry had to kneel down to get through the door. The tent was basic: one stick across the top was rested on 2 upright sticks driven into the ground. A rectangular sheet of animal skin was draped over the top post and held away from the centre by several wooden pegs hammered into the soil. Another blank sheet was laid down inside and hooked onto the walls so the owner’s things weren’t lying on the ground. Inside there wouldn’t have been room for 2 beds. As it was there was one bed and at the far end form the door a small wooden box that most people placed on its side so it formed two small shelves to keep various treasures, food and drink and whatever else the mudokon chose to keep. Barry himself of course kept his bow on his, as well as the skull from the first scrab he’d killed, the mask of his first slig and various other trophies. Jason had very little in his and he was using it simply as a box. The cloth lid was strapped over it so Barry couldn’t see the contents.
The whole thing could be packed away in less that 5 minutes and reassembled in at least thirty. But as they were constantly reminded, if they were attacked they were more likely to want to get their tents down than up.
"What does he want?" Jason asked Barry as he sat down on the considerably newer sheet than the worn one in Barry’s own tent.
"It’s not Edam really, it’s me." Barry answered. "I need your – well, some help, and Edam said you were the guy to ask."
Jason looked as surprised Barry had initially felt by this news. "What does he think I can do?"
"Odd knows, but I might as well ask. The thing is, I’ve gotta leave the village and-"
"Leave? You can’t leave can you? You’re the chief warrior!"
"I know, but… It’s a long story. But the only reason I escaped… I was helped to escape, was so I could eventually leave the forest and head South into Mudos." Jason was still looking confused and almost let down. Barry decided it would be best to enlighten him a little more on what was going on.
"Look Jase, you know that mudokon who turned up here today?" Jason nodded. "Well he was carrying a weapon for us to use against the glukkons. It can… The guy who helped us escape and helped someone else steal it from the factory where it was kept believes it can save the whole mudokon race. I have to take it South so it can be used."
"Why can’t we just use it here? Surely if it works somewhere it would work here just as well."
"Look Jason," How was he going to explain this. "It was… You know how powerful Edam is? A great shaman. Well it was made using power double Edam’s. Once activated it can save us all within, say, a few hours." Barry struggled to answer a question he didn’t know the answer to himself. "But, say the glukkons got hold of this thing and found a way to use it for themselves. If it an only be worked in one place… well that stops them using it against us if working it is really complicated. So I have to go."
Jason seemed at last to accept this. "So how am I meant to help you?"
"I don’t know… To the south of here are miles and miles of glukkon-run land. Getting through with the- with this weapon would be… well; it would be all but impossible! I need to find another way and Edam said you might know one…" Barry trailed off into silence.
For a while Jason looked like he was thinking hard. Then suddenly he looked up, grinning. "I’ve got it! There are these caves below the factory I escaped from. The glukkons sometimes chucked prisoners down there if they really broke the rules. Glukkons say that people just wonder round there for days and days until they starve and die…" He hesitated, "But some of the mudokons used to say… used to believe that if you kept going southwards through the caves, if you made it, you know, without starving or dying or whatever, you would come out in a safe place where there are no glukkons for miles and miles."
For a few seconds Barry thought there might be something in that, but then, caves that lead to freedom. It was a shot even to long for him to make. If All Jason knew were some stories from some freedom-obsessed prisoners.
But then Jason went on. "I never really believed it myself, but then this guy was brought to the factory who’d been found on the edge of a forest miles to the south. This guy had been chucked into the caves a year before; loads of people remembered him. They fed him to slogs but everybody heard about him. There was a bunch of people who kept trying to get themselves thrown into the caves. The glukkons killed some of them but some of them were dropped down."
Barry didn’t really hear the second part; his mind had stopped at the bit about the guy that had been recaptured. If someone had really made it out… It sounded perfect. If he could smuggle the Orb in, maybe some food and drink as well… Or perhaps force his way into the caves on his own… It still sounded a little wild but Edam would be able to tell whether it was true all not.
Barry stepped backwards out of the tent: "Ok, cheers Jase, that’s great. I’ll talk to you again tomorrow, thanks a ton." And that said, he stepped backwards out of the tent and ran away into the night, leaving Jason alone with his nightmares.


Reply!
And here's a little seemingly pointless something for you to gawp at while you do...

That was really good splat! Please continue!

That splat is verry cool how do u make that thing?

make what thing? The constellation or the story?

Wow. It looks... nothing like... a paramite...
Just like a real constallation!

I have come to apologise to all my loyal readers. I haven't replied to any of my fics here or anywhere else sinse Easter. I'm basically sitting under a pile of coursework and revision right now. I'll reply as much as I can but don't hold your breath for me. My last exam is...

June the 24th. Then freedom for several weeks!!! Huzzah! Expect more updates from that point onwards.

Don't let this get in the way of school. Work hard! We'll understand.
Particularly me, next year...

I'm finally back guys and I have some bad news. After a lot of thought I've decided that with an ever growing pile of revision that'll only get bigger in years to come, I'm going to close this story now...

Nah, I'm only messin with yer head. Expect chapters to be fewer for a while but I wouldn't dream of closing down altogether. I just spent 2 hours plus writing this last chapter so here it is! And there'll be more to come, this is getting good!


Chapter 3, Purpose
On Edam’s orders the village was being packed up, ready to be moved. Tents were taken down and wrapped round their respective poles, strapped to the tops of wooden boxes and slung on to the backs of their owners. 4 of the stronger villagers also bore boxes and skins that made up the excess of Edam’s belongings. Normally Barry would be one of the four but this time Graham had taken it in his place, as he had nothing to carry and was more than willing to help.
Barry held his own belongings. He had been silent as he took his tent down, silent as he walked across the village to where Edam was trying vainly to get the packing of his things organised.
"So," Edam began before Barry decided to open his mouth, "You’re going cave-crawling."
"Those caves he talked about are real?"
"Why shouldn’t they be real?"
Barry shrugged. "It seems to good to be true."
"Do you think Odd ignores the needs of his servants?" That was Edam all over. When Barry didn’t answer Edam went on. "When will you be leaving?"
"I won’t wait to set up camp with you when we stop. If Graham decides to stop with the village I’ll leave him my things."
"Ok. You’re a good warrior Barry; it always seemed to be the only praiseworthy thing about you. Still, you’re a good guy. We’ll miss your skills."
"If it’s ok… I’ll tell them I’m going before we head off. Pass on the torch, you know."
"Of course. Get yourself ready, I’ll call the tribe together as soon as we finish packing."
Barry nodded and left.

In the crowd, Jason found himself next to Graham.
Before them Edam Greatfeather and Barry were standing side by side on a large, reasonably flat-topped rock. Graham was watching Barry closely. He seemed expectant. Jason also knew what was coming and part of him couldn’t help blaming Graham for the loss of the village’s chief warrior.
"People of the Edakee," Barry called over the sea of heads. The talk died down. "I have to… I’m sorry to say that… I’m… I’ve got to leave the village." Talking immediately broke out, mostly sounding shocked. Barry called out again. "Those of you who remember when I joined you will remember I was… I was freed from the glukkons by a great shaman from the north. He saved me so that… so that someday I could carry a weapon southward to be used by the mudokons against the glukkons. Now, this weapon has been brought to the village by…" Barry glanced at Graham, "By an old friend. He risked his life to bring it to us. Many people died in getting it to him. Now I must carry on the journey and take it the rest of the way." From across the crowd, someone called out to him: "Don’t go! Don’t-" the rest of the words were drowned out as other voices rose up to join the first. Barry stood still on his rock, not speaking as the voices screamed to him not to leave. Edam laid a hand on his shoulder and he continued.
"I wish I could stay. You people mean a lot to me. I owe a lot to this village. But I also owe so much to the mudokon race as a whole. If I carry this weapon you will all be freed from our constant fear of glukkon attack. The passage south will be opened to you and those of you who were rescued from the factories nearby will be able to go south and look for your friends and tribes. I must go, for the sake of this world."
He took his things off his back and opened the box. He took out his bow. "Hubert!"
A strong looking mudokon came forward who Graham recognised as the spear thrower who’d killed his sligs. He pulled himself onto the rock and Barry placed a hand on his shoulder. "Hubert, your skills have developed well since you were found. You are strong and wise…" Barry muttered something that no one not on the rock could hear and Hubert grinned. Edam gave them both a withering look. "I believe you are the best person to follow me as Chief Warrior. He handed the younger mudokon his bow and Edam passed him a wooden torch he’d conjured out of somewhere, a pale grey flame burning from it.
Hubert held the flame to the bow and after a few seconds the bow caught and began to burn up quickly. He dropped them to the ground where they smouldered into a pile of ash. Then he pulled out his spear and slammed the shaft end into the ash. "I accept the job before me. I will protect his people. He took Barry’s hand in his, smiled at him and grabbed his spear again, which had miraculously not fallen over. Then he lowered himself from the rock and stood beside it, watching Barry.
"And so I must leave you. I will go soon. There are many of you I will miss. I wish the tribe all the best. May it grow and stay hidden from the hunter."
He lowered himself from the rock and Edam followed.
From across the crowd there were yells. Mudokons were shoved out of the way and suddenly a heavily built mudokon emerged. He raised a fist and Graham was sent flying over by a punch between the eyes. The mudokon snorted and walked away again leaving Jason rather confused, yet oddly satisfied.

"Let me go with you, it’ll be just like old times: Graham and Barry taking on the gluks!"
"Graham, your part is done, you got the Orb to me and now it’s my job to get it out of here," Barry answered wearily as Graham carefully nudged the front of his face that Edam had healed dizzyingly quickly.
"Ah, come on! You can’t do this on your own! You couldn’t get out of your cell every morning in Glucose without a map!"
"Despite everything, Barry grinned. "But how would it look if 2 mudokons appeared in front of a factory? One could be overlooked, if I turned up I wouldn’t need to be listed or anything. If two of us show up they’ll have to do all the official stuff and we could end up 60 miles back in Glucose or cleaning running meat grinders in Odd-knows-where."
Graham sighed. Barry pulled off his pack and handed Graham his tent. "Can you hold this a second, I gotta go talk to Edam."
Graham sighed again and took the tent and Barry put the wooden box on his back and disappeared into the crowd behind them.
Ten minutes later Graham realised Edam was walking in front of them and he hurried forward. He caught sight of the Shaman and ran towards him. "Hey, Edam." The shaman was walking alone. "Edam, where’s Barry gone?"
"I dunno. I haven’t seen him. He must choose his own path Graham." Graham was already running back through the crowd, leaving an indignant shaman looking after him and deciding that he liked Barry more.
Graham ran to the back of the procession and looked around. He spotted Jason walking alone and hurried towards him. "Jason? Have you seen Barry?"
"He stopped back there, said he had to take a leak." Jason said, and then his eyes grew wide. "You don’t think he’s…"
Graham ran back down the trail until he found a path that someone had recently bashed through the undergrowth. He scrambled down it until he tripped over a wooden box lying in the path. He tugged off the lid. Inside were an old cracked scrab’s skull, a worn sligs mask, a sheath of arrows and various other treasures that Graham had seen in Barry’s tent the day before. He slowly lifted out a carved piece of iron that vaguely resembled the sun that Graham had sat in a cell and watched him carve night by night in the cell next to his, years before. He held it in his palm and then curled his fingers over it, cutting off the light from the real sun touching the old carving. "Goodbye again my friend." He whispered.


For anyone who still remembers I exist, I loves all of ya and I loves yuh feedback even more! Get replying, next chapter will arrive as soon as I can work a hole in my revision.

Yay! An update. Good chapter, anyway, I like long chapters, pity I don't usually write them. ;)

I just read this story and I was amazed at the skill! Such an amazing story, greater I have never read! Keep it coming.

Nice work, Splat.

I know. it's great to see so many people reading this after so long without updating! I'll ty to get the next bit written this week, my Mums stressin at me right now though.

Ok, I did about half of this chapter last Wednesday and all but the last paragraph on Thursday morning and had to stop for an exam. It took me until today (Sunday) to find the motivation to finish it! I don't think the ending's so good but I think the first half is some of my best. I actually felt really bad at what I was doing to Barry.

I can't believe this! I'm getting an emotional attachment to a character I created!

I'll just let you read it, shall I?


Chapter 4, Forgetting

Barry threw his box off of his back and took a step away from it, away from the path. Away from his tribe, his friends, away from everything he had known for the last 20 years.

He hesitated and turned back. Through the trees he could see the path as the stragglers of the group tottered past without ever noticing him. He reached down for his box, which had landed upside down. The lid had fallen off and some of the contents had spilt across the forest floor. He turned it the right way up and placed it neatly across the track like a barrier cutting him off from the path. He picked up the skull of his first kill and rested it in his hands. The elongated jaws, the beady eye sockets, the crack down the side where his arrow had hit and shot though the bone like a wedge, driving it apart.

He threw it into the box and picked up a few stray arrows from the ground. He found a few more lying around inside the box and he slipped them all neatly back into their sheath and laid it in the box.

As he picked up the lid he noticed a carved piece of iron that also had fallen out. It was a figure of the sun he had dreamed of and longed for during all those years in that cold cell, working all day, lying awake at night listening to the moaning and sobbing of the mudokons around him. Suddenly he didn’t want to leave. It felt so hard to once again forget everything he’d once known and move on. Friends that had become closer than family, Graham who had always stood by him and refused to escape without him. Edam with all his quirks, his temper and his constant, irritating philosophising. Poor, naïve Jason who probably still believed that he was standing away from the path, relieving himself.

He moved to put the carving into his loincloth and then froze. Angrily, he flung the piece of iron into the box, closed the lid over it and stood up. He mustn’t do this. He needed to forget this all, to blank out this era of happiness in his life. He was taking the Orb south for the sake of his species. He was leaving behind friends that he would almost certainly never see again. And he could only bring himself to do that by giving it up. By forgetting it all. By leaving all this in a dream. Or perhaps a story that had happened to someone else.

It wasn’t part of his life. It couldn’t be part of his life because he knew that he couldn’t have left it all behind if it had been him.

With hot tears running down his face he turned around and ran into the forest.

When Graham came looking for him 15 minutes later he was already more than a mile away.

* * *

Barry ran though trees without looking back. When he came to a stream he splashed southwards along it, so that those dreams couldn’t follow him. He eventually came to a pool in the stream where the water became around a metre deep and he splashed through with it around his waist. Half way through the pool he stopped and looked down into the water. After a few seconds the rippling he’d caused ended and he stared down at his own reflection.
Black tribal paint still blemished his face. He stared at the hateful marks for a few seconds before plunging his head into the water, rubbing at his face with his hands, coming up for air only when his lungs were screaming before once plunging his head into the icy, breathless mass. Reaching down, he grabbed handfuls of gritty dirt off the bottom of the pool and scrubbed at his face with it, not stopping even when his blood began to discolour the water.

And then, with choking sobs, he pulled himself to the bank, and laid on the water’s edge for what seemed like an eternity. Eventually he pulled himself onto his hands and looked around once more at his reflection, fear coursing through him that the paint would still be there.

But it was gone and on several parts of his face, was replaced by weeping red scars which, to Barry, seemed a lot less ugly than the black marks.

* * *

Saying goodbye one last time would have been too much for the ex-Chief Warrior of the Edakee Tribe. He had intended to stay till they’d once more set up camp but that would have meant another ceremony. Once more he would have been above them all and they would spread out below him and whatever he said wouldn’t have been enough.
Graham begging to come as well was more than he could stand. He knew that they couldn’t do it together but the fact that that choice had been there… And that despite it all, he could have taken it…

These thoughts plagued Barry as he ran. Thoughts that he wanted so desperately to drive out of his because they forced him too look back, the thing he never wanted to do again.

He had to move slower now as the trees were thicker and he didn’t like the idea of running into one of them. Picking along gave him more time to think and despite his best efforts, all he could think about was all he was leaving behind.

Mentally kicking himself he stopped and looked around, searching for a sign of a sparser part of the forest. Then, heading slightly left of his original path, he picked his way round tree branches and over rotting wood and low bushes, until he came to a patch of the forest where there was a lot less cover.

He knew better than to run but that wasn’t what he’d had in mind. Places like these were dangerous, the little cover for such a long way meant he was an easy target for any patrols that came through here. That was what he wanted in the end of course, but out here there was a definite chance that any patrols that found him might be from the wrong factory and he could end up Odd-knew-where. He had to keep his eyes and ears open as he stalked from tree to tree, slipping through the grass and ducking under bushes. This left little time for thought of much else.

It was a much slower process than going through the trees but the longer he spent, the less he thought. Still, by nightfall he’d made a good dent in his journey. At one point a patrol had crossed his path but hadn’t seen him. His skin-colour disguised him against the bushes and the sligs all looked pretty drunk anyway.

Even as it grew dark he kept going. The sooner he got out of the forest, the less he would have to look back. Once he was in the factory there would be no going back and thoughts of turning and running back to the village would no longer plague him.

And he didn’t want to dream.

Once in the night he heard talking and crept towards the source. A group of sligs were sitting around a campfire, looking depressed. Glancing around the clearing he’d seen nothing to suggest where they’d come from and he moved on, not wanting to take the risk.

He kept going all night and the next day. Another night came and went. By the second morning his brain was foggy and his limbs felt like lead but he didn’t want to stop. He took the Orb out of his loincloth and stared at it, trying to motivate himself. He had to get further, not much further. Just a little longer and he could stop. Just a little longer. Not far. Not far…

He tripped and fell over onto his face. The Orb fell out of his hand and rolled into the grass. Sleep claimed him.



I changed the formatting a little to show the paragraphing.
What dya think?

The new paragraphing makes it easier to read. I liked the chapter. Very solem.

great. i think he went a bit insane in that one. I didn't intend for that to happen but i think it made it better than what I'd had in mind

Awesome, I love this story! Its getting better and better.

Yay, guess who's back :) Yup... It's me ^_^ And now i'm up-to-date with both of ya stories :D...

Huzzah! Great to see ya T. It's good to be praised!

I've read this story right from the start and I am very impressed. I look forward to the next bit, :)

Gah! Sorry this took so long, i've had almost complete writers block for the past two months, plus I struggled to get a beggining that matched the end of the last chapter. But here it is at last! Now with sligs, chapter 5!

Chapter 5, Lost

As one learns, the middle of a patrol route is never the best place to fall asleep. Barry awoke with a yell at a sudden burning on the back of his neck. He leapt aside and the sligs around him laughed. One flicked away the cigarette that he’d just snubbed out on Barry’s skin.

"Get up Mud."

"Wh-where are you from?" Barry stuttered. He needed to be in with the right sligs. If they were from the right place he could follow them for the rest of the way. If they weren’t he was screwed.

"You’ll find out soon enough, now get up!"

Barry pushed himself to his feet, looking around the huddle of sligs nervously.

He was more than a little surprised when one suddenly grabbed him from behind and yanked his loincloth down. Another grabbed his arms and held him still as the first unfolded his clothing and shook it out. For a few seconds Barry was horrified, expecting the Orb to drop to the ground any second.

The fact that the Orb didn’t drop to the ground terrified him even more. The sligs pawed over the meat and fruit he’d brought with him until one stood up, spat on it, and threw his loincloth back at him.

Barry forced himself to hold down his panic as one of the sligs pointed a gun at his forehead while he redressed. His mind was racing, desperately trying to remember what had happened before he’d fallen asleep. He realised he must have had the Orb in his hand, he couldn’t remember putting it away. But he also couldn’t remember lying down to sleep.

The rest of the sligs were talking to each other nearby. "Well he hasn’t got anything valuable has ‘e? What dyou think the boss is after, some new fruit to go in ‘is tea?"

"Well I dunno, he might o’ swallowed it or somethin’, they’ll do a proper search if we get ‘im back. Anyway, he’s a mud innee? They’ll be happy to have the slave and enough said, even if they just send us out ‘ere again."

One of the sligs glanced at him. "Look at them scars on his face, looks like he’s been rubbing himself against a brick wall."

"We’re not all as stupid as you are Berren. Just cause you get a thrill out o’ hurtin’ yourself don’t mean we all do it."

The slig behind Barry nudged him harder than was necessary in the back of the head. "Oy Mud, get on with it or I’ll have some o’ the guys take out there feelins on you rather than each other."

Barry nodded numbly and gave his head one last fruitless search, before nodding and doing up the last knot. He prayed silently that the Orb would be picked up by a mudokon.

The slig behind him grunted and shoved him in the back with his gun. Barry yelped and stumbled froward, tumbling into the huddle of sligs. They leapt aside and he tripped over and once more found himself lying on the ground. He felt several guns press into his back. One of the sligs ran over to the one who had been guarding him.

"We thought we’d take ‘im straight back sir. It’d be to much trouble to lead ‘im around the patrol and management would go crazy if we let ‘im go."

"I know what you thought, and so will everyone this side of Sligos, the way you were talkin’. We’ll have all the savages down here in 2 hours if ya not careful. Get ‘im up and we’ll get a move on."

"What’ll they do once we get ‘im in sir?"

The slig leered at Barry. "Strip ‘im again, x-ray for a start. Then if they see anythin’ interestin’ they’ll cut ‘im open and ‘ave a look." He laughed coldly. "Wouldn’t mind havin’ a go at that meself. I can be pretty handy with one o’ them surgery knives." He mimed jabbing and hacking flesh with an imaginary scalpel and laughed loudly. The 4 of the other sligs laughed as well, Barry noticed at least one sounded rather forced.

One of the sligs over him turned to the one who hadn’t laughed. He slapped him on the back. "Cheer up Envin, only a joke." The silent slig grunted. Barry realised he hadn’t heard him speak at all.

One of the other sligs piped up. "What was that? Speak up." This time all the smaller sligs laughed, though not as loud, certainly more genuine. The leader looked angry and Envin growled again and pulled a knife out of his belt and waved it at the sligs around him.

Their squad leader spoke up. "Leave the guy alone slurgs, or he won’t be the only one wi’ no vocal chords."

He strode over, grabbed Barry by his feathers and hauled him to his feet. Barry yelped loudly, getting more laughs from the sligs, who gathered around him, three in a semicircle behind and the other three ahead. The mute, Envin, was standing close to the captain. Three guns poked Barry in the back and shoved him forward, and then they were walking southwards down the bare, treeless area, keeping towards the east side of the path in the direction Barry had been heading the night before. That was a good sign, he thought bitterly. But then remembered without the Orb they might as well have been taking him back into Glucose.

It was as they walked past the spot where they’d picked him up that he remembered tripping over with the Orb in his hands and not having the energy to get back up. The orb must have rolled out of his hands and now…

The irony of it made him want to scream out loud. Every step was taking him further from the stupid ball. What could he do, poke the slig in front of him in the back, tell him he’d dropped something and ask ever so politely if he could go and pick it up?

The sligs were walking along quickly, perhaps nervous that the natives would have heard them. Barry needed to act quickly or it would be to late and he would be made a slave for nothing.

The thought came to him. He would be made a slave for nothing, he would leave his home for nothing, leave his people behind forget everything important to him and still not gain anything through it.

Cursing the world and everything in it, Barry leapt backwards, ducking under the slig’s guns and leapt for the patch of long grass, growing in a small hollow under the tree he’d fallen down beside the night before. His arms where stretched forward; behind him the sligs were yelling. He landed on his chest and swung his arms through the grass. His left elbow knocked against something warm and round, an object that felt as delicate as an eggshell, yet so hard it couldn’t be broken with a sledgehammer.

He grasped for it. Overhead he heard gunshots and as his right hand closed round the metallic green ball that meant freedom to his race, two bullets hit him. One scraping the flesh on his back and then tearing along the side of his neck, missing his jawbone by millimetres, the other cracking into his left shoulder, braking flesh and bone. He gasped in pain from the second wound. His left arm fell limp. In a second of insight he swung his right arm, in a swift motion, down to his loincloth, stuffing the Orb out of sight and then to the lower section of his left arm.

He pushed himself up to his knees. Cradling his left arm in his right. Pain surged though his body and down his left arm from the shoulder that was itself now numb to the pain. He turned his neck towards the sligs, just in time to see a gun barrel swing forward and crack him on the side of his head.


Hope you like it, hope it was worth the wait. I'm quite happy about that one myself so I hope it's good enough to justify that.

Woob woob woob, new chapter! You have every right to be happy with it, great stuff! Will Barry be all right and is he getting taken to the right place? I look forward to the next chapter, keep going!

Weee! :D FInally ya came with a new chappie ^_^ Barry is very unlucky in my oppinion O_o

Huh. That was subtle.
Gah. Heh. That's funny.

Yikes, yikes, and double-yikes.
How could I have gone and not read this story for so long?
This is stunning work. Don't leave us hanging any longer than you have to.

Lots of people have gone so long without reading this. Heh, but its good to see you here and I'm glad to hear you like it!

I think the next chapter's about done (I can't check cus I'm at my sister's house right now), I might have posted it already but ti got deleted with all the trouble here recently. Ah well, I'll check on Monday (the day I go back to schools :fuzsad: ), I'll probably finish it then if it isn't, I might be thinking of this one actually... I'm not sure now!

Hey! Yo! Goober!
Where's the story?
I would hate to have to unleash Utter Chaos on you.
You wouldn't like that.
Not a bit.

Sorry, turns out it wasn't nearly as finished as I remembered. I've been a little stuck for ideas for the next chapter, but I came up with something this morning so I should update soon, thanks for giving me a kick in the right direction Dave!

Sigh, I'm just not as efficient as I used to be...

Doesn't matter Splat, we all get like that. Other authors here, very good authors like yourself, haven't updated their fics in weeks, r in some cases, a month or two. I can wait, but I don't want to wait too much longer, your talent is too good to be not seen.

And Teal didn't update fools errand for over a year... grr, I just read her dauntless series and its ground to a halt at the worst possible time!

Anyway, I'll put up a new chapter as soon as its written, which hopefully shouldn't be to long. I wanna get a labtop or something so I can do more writing in my freetime when I can't get on the PC (I hate writing by hand, its very awkward).