I don't think confidence is really the problem, but rather, I'm far to cynical to believe I have a chance. Also, I get the feeling people in my class find me creepy and strange. I think it might also be that I don't really know where to start or where to go, both figuratively and literally.

Not only that, I don't think I've met the right person yet.

I should make a blog sometime.

You're also fourteen, this is a bigger factor than you think.

:fuzzle: ...

If you are just trying to get up the courage to talk to the pretty girls, then yeah, you don't stand a chance. Have conversations with people. Talk about interests. These things happen naturally. As much as your penis may want to force the matter, it's not doing you any good. Don't listen to it. Your penis will make you sweaty, and nervous. No one wants to sleep with the sweaty nervous guy.

Can Abe even get it up? He's a sexless drone. If he even has a penis, it's only purpose is for urination.

Are you going to tell me you're into Abe and you're a urophile?

Lemme tell you guys, I'm glad we chose a game with such ugly characters. I don't think I could handle being a member of a forum that emulated characters it's fans could milk their merlin to. It's just downright scary and hilarious that there is a handful of people in the world who are turned on by Oddworld creatures. Who else remembers the newbie who had a stiffy for Aslik+Molluck eroticism?

This is why I'm not a member of any anime forums.

Oh yeah, it was that girl named Molluck's Lover or something.

And let's not forget about all the furries that had a thing for Stranger.

Shall I post my fanfic?

You must!

fuck sake.

and now i feel incredibly conscious of my user name. only named it that because i didn't know the name of the slig that got fried at the end of AO.

I always thought the fact that it completely lacks grammar is more damning.

So, a fair few OWF fans see Sligs as ensemble darkhorse characters, some complete weirdos have them as their avatars. Would these be Scalies or juest extreme sadist/masochists?

They would be Scalies..

More like furries with a fetish for reptiles. That shit makes no fucking sense.

Furries and Shipping are the only two things I can never understand about fandoms.

and for the fucking record: no, i don't have any sexual afflictions/fetishes concerning sligs, or any Oddworld creature, in fact. reason i like them is probably due to the fact they have guns, and are trigger happy. on the other hand, if someone was like that in real life, i would not like them. i would run the other way.

and the user name stays as it is as a reminder to myself never to let my grammar go downhill like that again. never have liked the idea of changing your user name, anyway.

damn you and your opinions, WoF.

I notice several members of this forum really want to get it on with a girl, but don't know how to start. I recommend following these simple steps:

1) Attract her attention, but don't let her know you're doing it deliberately. Eg, prepare a banana peel beforehand, slip on it as she comes and fall on her.

2) Start to talk about something. Anything. Except sex (this is very important).

3) Hold a conversation with her every day for a week (but never about sex).

4) Invite her over to your house to help with your homework.

5) Tell her you can't be bothered doing the homework any more. There's something else you'd much rather be doing on your desk right now.


However you approach a girl, never ask for sex. This might tempt her into sorry sex and you really don't want that.


Apart from this, I can't give you any more tips, except that you should never pay more than $1000 a night.

I can't describle the mental image I have now of AiN, a girl he's attracted to, a bridle and much piggyback riding.

Now that I've said this, I shall return to not posting in this thread.

http://i31.tinypic.com/28l5445.jpg

Crack Pairings are awesome.

She needs to wax her eyebrows.

I don't view multiverse shipping as shipping, that's just harmless fun.

Real shipping is srs bsns.

You need to wax YOUR FACE

It's so prickly you could stand in for a cactus

What is "shipping"? If it's anything unlike a Nicaraguan Crab Sandwich, I don't care.

Pairing two characters with no romantic involvement together because you think they belong together.

Also done extensively with pokemon, for...some...reason.

Who the hell waxes their face?
And yes, right now it is. I've been meaning to shave but there's really no one I feel like impressing with a clean-shaven jawline.

Okay let me stop you right there.

Asking a girl to your home to help with your homework might be even more obvious than to ask for sex directly.

Some girls are straight forward like that, which saves the hassle of dancing around the subject. In fact, I've gotten several girls this way.

You should not pay anything a night. Nothing is more hurting for a man's ego then realizing that the only way he's going to have sex between now and a year is to pay for it.

There is something like a thrill of the hunt. The entire process that involves flirting with the girl, picking her up and working up to having sex with her is a thrill that many men seek (and subsequently the reason why so many men cheat). It's an ego booster to know you can pick up a hot girl and it becomes an even bigger booster to get her into bed.

The ultimate mega ego booster, however, is when you manage to make a hot girl pay you for sex. I have no idea how that would work, since any hot girl who has even the slightest clue about her looks should know she just needs to juggle her boobs and men form a line. But apparently it's been done, though not by me, I don't think my ego could handle it. It might explode of awesomeness.

oh my god you dumb fucks with your tips... how about:

1)Treat her like a human being

/end

women with moustaches

In case you hadn't realised, Mr Havoc, I suppose I'd better tell you that the whole post was a joke.

And even if a hot girl asked to pay me for sex, I wouldn't accept. I wouldn't sleep with someone I wasn't attracted to, and if I was attracted to her, I'd do it for free.

Havoc, you're disgusting.

Really, that last bit made my skin crawl.

But... that doesn't work. :fuzconf:

The girls I get it on with aren't human anyway, why should I treat them like they are?

Havoc makes me ill, I'm just instinctively blocking out enchilado's posts now.

Lol. This thread is such a piece of shit.

*agrees with Leto.

This is not true.

Very incisive Fabio.

I lost my virginity at 15 in the alley behind Rockyanno's Pizzeria. Not in a car. Standing up against the wall. And then my friends drove behind the place, and caught us.

Everyone at school called me Rockyanno's for about two years.

Sorry Joe but I edited it :( I feel ashmed..

EDIT: no more..

Had you already come?

YOU HEARTLESS MONSTER

Lol. I love sex-based nicknames.

Feel free to eviscerate me with some shells like Ipazia.

Did AIN just turn vore?