Nah, stingbee was only ever the imitation. Alpha is the true original.


After many years of married life, two New Yorkers decide to take a romantic holiday to the same hotel in Miami that they had their honeymoon. As it happens, they left it too late to book tickets and the husband had to go one day before his wife. When he arrived he immediately sent an email so she would know he had arrived safely. Unfortunately he misspelled his email address...

In a small town in Kansas an old woman gets home from her husband's funeral and goes to check her email. Her son hears a scream and comes rushing into the room to see her fainted on the floor. He checks the computer screen and immediately turns pale:

To my beloved wife,

Well I just arrived and, what do you know, they've just installed computers so we can contact our loved ones. The trip was fine, they really know how to treat a man well.

Everything is comfortable and I'm looking forward to you joining me tomorrow.

Your loving husband.

PS. Gee, it's really hot down here.





2nd joke listed here that I've been told by a Rabbi. This one in a sermon.

Wait!
I totally forgot this was the "Funny pics" Thread. Sorry for the disturbance.

I have some jokes but they are kind of offensive. It's not about any of you so don't worry. Jokes:Yo mama so fat she sat on a rainbow and a skittle popped out. Yo mama so fat she sat on a school bus and it turned to a lowrider.

that was offensive?..how?

That's what I want to know.

Because it says "Yo mama so FAT".

Tell me you're joking (no situational irony intended).

Only a joke about something incridbly cruel, racist, or demeaning is really considered offensive. Other than that, it's just meh.

The only kinds of fat people who would get offended at a joke about fat people are the ones who are uncomfortable about their weight.

Sadly, there are many of these.

I, on the other hand, encourge jokes about fat people. Let's face it, we fat guys are funny-looking, all of that flesh hanging off of our abdomen.

I'm gonna get some candy, I'm hungry.

Would you like a pie with that, sir? :p

Yeah, well, Jo Mama so dumb she tripped over the cordless phone. Ooo-HWAYO!

HAHAHA! Okay, that was good. :D

Yo' mamma so fat, she got her own gravity, atmosphere, and a moon!

Hey, calm down with those offensive jokes, guys.




....




:D

Yo mama so fat, after sex she smokes a turkey.

AND

Yo mama so dumb, she thought TuPac Shakur was a Jewish holiday.

Yo mama so fat she sat on the ground and went to hell faster then you could say Fatty.

Yo mama so fat, whenever she went in the ocean, the whales said, "We, are, family"

Yo mama so fat, we have to get a twinki to lure her places. :D