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-   -   Heaven is a fairy story for people afraid of the dark (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=20278)

Tadimo 05-18-2011 07:23 AM

Oh my god, the cheesecake was a lie after all :O

EDIT: Also, well put

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 07:30 AM

I'm sure if God had a divine plan, it may have had nothing to do with the massive fucking monsters that wandered on the planet for a hundred million years doing nothing but eat each other.

Cool plan bro (Y)

Havoc 05-18-2011 07:45 AM

I never understood why any god, with the power to create anything they want, wouldn't just create a world as they want it to be at the end of their divined plan. Would save a lot of shit and the mess we're in right now.

STM 05-18-2011 08:04 AM

Because that's boring.

Ridg3 05-18-2011 08:08 AM

God: Go humans, go forth and cause all sorts of mayhem. Start wars, riots, drugs and crazy fads because I couldn't be bothered creating the perfect world free from that stuff. It's too boring.

That's what God really said to Adam and Eve, they weren't really banned from the Garden of Eden.

OddjobAbe 05-18-2011 08:09 AM

I thought that God would be beyond boring.

There is no proof that God exists, and there willl, as far as theists are concerned, never will be, because they will mould their beliefs around the evidence as though their beliefs are plastic encasing a block inside a vacuum former.

JennyGenesis 05-18-2011 08:11 AM

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Because that's boring.

So god is up there being entertained by what he is watching beneath him?

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 08:18 AM

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So god is up there being entertained by what he is watching beneath him?

God's probably the stereotypical slob sitting on his ass watching the world's events through a television.

You saying that also brings light to the fact why people think God lives in space or something.

I'm also pretty sure there isn't a red guy with a pitchfork and tail living in the center of the planet.

Ridg3 05-18-2011 08:41 AM

http://profile.ak.fbcdn.net/hprofile...865_9210_n.jpg

I hope there is. I would totally go kill someone for no reason just to meet him.

JennyGenesis 05-18-2011 08:46 AM

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God's probably the stereotypical slob sitting on his ass watching the world's events through a television.

You saying that also brings light to the fact why people think God lives in space or something.

I'm also pretty sure there isn't a red guy with a pitchfork and tail living in the center of the planet.

If the Devil is down there then God must be up there? Why would they be in the same place? Considering that Satan was supposed to be this nasty guy (or snake :p) he was in a good position wasn't he.

Wings of Fire 05-18-2011 08:59 AM

Bitches don't know that Satan is a servant of God.

Book of Job: Canon

Paradise Lost: Fanfiction

Mac Sirloin 05-18-2011 09:25 AM

Of course the Cripple with the superbrain would say something like this. Stephen Hawking is just another example that god has a great sense of humor.

STM 05-18-2011 09:57 AM

I think WoF is right actually, scholars believe that God still loved Lucifer until the temptation of Jesus because he practically employed him to tempt people. This might sound like heresy but I don't agree with all that God does and I know I'm supposed to, I forget who it is but in the Old Testament he allows Satan to kill a man's children, live stock, family, destroy his lively hood etcetera to test his resolve. And then when the man shouts at God he tells him to be for forgiveness and that it was all part of his master plan. I know God is inflicted with human emotions like us but that is kid+magnifying glass to me. I hope he's not too angry I said that.

Manco 05-18-2011 11:00 AM

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You see this table? There is a cheesecake on it.

That's an interesting adaptation of Russell's Teapot.

Havoc 05-18-2011 11:16 AM

Yeah well, teapots are stupid. Cheesecakes are delicious.

STM 05-18-2011 11:58 AM

But...the cheese cake is a lie.

OddjobAbe 05-18-2011 12:18 PM

I'm glad you finally admitted it.

Havoc 05-18-2011 12:19 PM

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But...the cheese cake is a lie.

Hey, we're making progress. Very good!

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 01:04 PM

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If the Devil is down there then God must be up there? Why would they be in the same place? Considering that Satan was supposed to be this nasty guy (or snake :p) he was in a good position wasn't he.

Yes, Satan was God's former servant.

God knew there was something off about him. He had horns and a tail.

Wings of Fire 05-18-2011 01:05 PM

There ain't no former about it. Stop reading fanfiction!

Ridg3 05-18-2011 01:06 PM

You stop reading fiction!

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 01:07 PM

God x Satan slash sounds pretty good. I'm gonna go see if I can find some.

Wings of Fire 05-18-2011 01:07 PM

I'd rather read any one of the fanfics the bible has inspired than the thing itself. Except maybe the Book of Mormon, or the Da Vince Code.

Is it any wonder why Dante and Milton's ideas of heaven and hell stuck so hard to christianity? The book is a snoozefest.

metroixer 05-18-2011 01:10 PM

Did I just read someone compare a divine being to a cheesecake?

I get the point don't worry :p

e: maybe god is actually in the form of a cheesecake......

e2: heaven is a cheesecake factory

e3: brb going to fanfiction.net

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 01:14 PM

FF.net doesn't allow submissions like that. You need to comb to the murky backwater of the internet to find shit like this.

Wings of Fire 05-18-2011 01:18 PM

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FF.net doesn't allow submissions like that. You need to comb to the murky backwater of the internet to find shit like this.

Is it better or worse than Cameron/Clegg slashfic?

Comparatively speaking.

Dixanadu 05-18-2011 01:21 PM

The one I found would be...somewhat worse in the sense it's pretty badly written.

Needs moar lemonz

enchilado 05-18-2011 01:49 PM

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I think it's cute that 22 posts after I stop posting I'm still the subject of a lot of talk.

I think it's cute that you counted how many posts had been made.

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Thing is I believe God exists but to me, some of the Bible, miraculous events and other phenomena are proof to me and therefore I have knowledge that he exists.

So in other words, your mind can't comprehend these miraculous things happening without a God to make them?

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This knowledge doesn't apply to everyone of course.And any way, why are you people so intent on being angry at me? All I've said is what I hold true to myself, I'm not slamming my face against my keyboard because you lot are all atheists. Learn tolerance I say, it's a fantastic trait. (That's not just aimed at you btw Nate).

I don't think anybody is angry at you. I at least feel sorry for you, believing in something entirely preposterous because your parents told you it was true. Not that it's their fault; they were presumably told the same thing by their parents and theirs by theirs (if they decided to believe it without being brainwashed as children they were either mad or had an ulterior motive).

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I think there's one person on this forum I wouldn't mind debating with again about this topic and that's BM because he has never spoken against me or religion directly he just uses scientific proof to back up his claims.

BM's amazing like that, you two could probably have a real debate if you did the same.

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So I put it to you guys, where the proof God doesn't exist? And don't say because we can't see him because no one on this forum has ever 'seen' air, maybe scientists have developed an elaborate hoax for its existence and we actually don't breath anything!!! XD

Where's your proof that Havoc's cheesecake (or Russell's teapot) doesn't exist? If you hadn't been brainwashed to believe in God, you wouldn't. Because before changing your beliefs you would need to see something that convinced you, and there's nothing that could possibly convince an atheist that God existed. Only the parents of a small child will be able to manage that, and even then he's likely to outgrow his childish beliefs when he's older.

And we can see air.

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God x Satan slash sounds pretty good. I'm gonna go see if I can find some.

Surely that would be God/Satan?

metroixer 05-18-2011 01:56 PM

I'm sorry I can't be specific, but I remember there being some sort of argument for religion stating that some things are found beautiful without a reason. It regarded a certain flower, but apparently it's this really sweet looking flower, and it has no evolutionary reason to look so attractive to us. It just does, because God wanted to have us to appreciate the beauty of life.

Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

Manco 05-18-2011 02:25 PM

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Does anyone know what I'm talking about?

Argument from beauty?