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-   -   Virginity v3 (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=19715)

Dynamithix 10-09-2010 02:03 PM

Good one, crashpunk.

abe is now! 10-10-2010 04:45 AM

No, punk

Dixanadu 10-10-2010 06:59 AM

I'd have gladly given up my virginity with her.

STM 10-10-2010 07:05 AM

I wouldn't, not my type...I'm leaving that open for succesors

Dixanadu 10-10-2010 07:17 AM

Please....PLEASE show me a picture of your ideal 'type'.

STM 10-10-2010 07:21 AM

hmm...http://www.hecklerspray.com/wp-conte...um-posters.jpg

well what am I supposed to post?

enchilado 10-10-2010 07:28 AM

Fuck Gollum, I found you a better one: http://tinyurl.com/ScraptrapmansPerfectWoman

STM 10-10-2010 08:08 AM

what 0:14 oh I see you Rick Roll'd me...good one. Sigh.

Facsimile 10-10-2010 07:11 PM

Was procrastinating and ended up at this forum somehow.

Anyway, I'm 22, still a virgin, and intend to be so forever.

enchilado 10-10-2010 07:40 PM

:

what 0:14

No, 2:53.

Dixanadu 10-11-2010 10:12 AM

I'm being serious, though. Show me.

Ridg3 10-11-2010 10:29 AM

I don't think I mentioned it but I ain't a virgin and by god did the first time scare me, I was more focused on making sure that I'd last for her sake but, alas, it wasn't meant to be.

After-wards I realized that if I sneak off for a crafty wank first I could last for fucking decades. And that's my advice for all the virgins out there... before sex, go for a wank, be heavy on the foreplay then stick it in.

STM 10-11-2010 10:33 AM

@Ridg3, because that worked really well on the Inbetweeners.

@Dix, I have no fucking idea but I guess intelligent to a degree, pretty if possible, funny and happy.

Ridg3 10-11-2010 10:36 AM

:

()
@Ridg3, because that worked really well on the Inbetweeners.

What...? I don't watch the Inbetweeners and yes (if you're contradicting), it does work, now you don't have to take my advice and you can go through life dis-satisfying every woman you meet, forever.

OANST 10-11-2010 10:38 AM

Even doing that the day before sex can greatly increase performance.

STM 10-11-2010 10:43 AM

Well I aim to please Ridg, I suppose as long as it's good for her first time

Ridg3 10-11-2010 10:45 AM

There's another thing you could try and that's trying to make your masturbation sessions last for 15 minutes by stopping right before the orgasm, letting it die down then resuming and repeating until you can last without having to stop.

Or you could try Durex Performo, although this is a route I don't recommend seeing as it is damn near impossible for you to have an orgasm.

STM 10-11-2010 11:02 AM

Yeh but if I did that wouldn't I eventually never orgasm? Sorry if that's a stupid question

OANST 10-11-2010 11:07 AM

Not unless you really enjoy blue-balls.

STM 10-11-2010 12:27 PM

ack

Wings of Fire 10-11-2010 08:22 PM

The only thing better than blue balls is walking through a forest in midwinter in the north of scotland with blue balls before meeting her parents for saturday dinner.

Dixanadu 10-12-2010 07:16 AM

:

()
Or you could try Durex Performo, although this is a route I don't recommend seeing as it is damn near impossible for you to have an orgasm.

Indeed, after an hour and exhausted, I gave up. I eventually forgot I was pleasing her, as I was just racing to finish. She did say it was amazing though but I was still annoyed to shit.

Never getting them again.

enchilado 10-12-2010 07:36 AM

Apparently Durex condoms are clinically proven.



How do I get a job there?

Facsimile 10-15-2010 01:08 AM

:

()
There's another thing you could try and that's trying to make your masturbation sessions last for 15 minutes by stopping right before the orgasm, letting it die down then resuming and repeating until you can last without having to stop.

Or you could try Durex Performo, although this is a route I don't recommend seeing as it is damn near impossible for you to have an orgasm.

15 minutes? Fuck that. I've got to be done and out of the girls locker rooms as fast as possible.