A. Drown him, then when his dead pull his brain out and eat it.
Q. What happens if A says to B " wanna rape C"? |
A: They **** you up the ass instead. Hard. With spoons and forks.
Q: Why are gay people not struck down by the almighty? |
A. God is secretly homosexual.
Q. How do I know this? |
A: Apparantly, what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas.
Q: What can you really do with a dollop of daisy? |
A: Whatever your little heart desires.
Q: If the first step is admitting the problem, what's the second? |
A: Dancing on your grave.
Q: How can you tell your fiancé isn't a zombie? - Rexy |
A: When s/he doesn't invite his dead relatives to the wedding.
Q: If it takes one stone to kill two birds, how many stones are used to kill three? |
A: One and heif!
Q: Would the spleen of a remote control be hard to dismember? |
A: It all depends on whether or not you're up to the challenge.
Q: Should I have slept last night? |
A: No, because I was in ur base, killing ur d00ds
Q: If I slept with a toaster, then killed a fish, how tall is a communist? |
As tall as the amount of wood a woodchuck could chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood.
w00t!?!? |
A. NO!! WHEEEEEE!!!!
Q. What happens if a keyboard burns alive? |
A: It will make horrible screaming noises that will haunt your dreams until the day you die.
Q: Knock knock? |
A: BLAM BLAM. Gotcha, you sonofabitch.
Q: In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight? |
A: You killed me, remember? Do you really expect a dead guy to respond to some cheesy song?
Q: What should I do next? |
A: Go check on the lion and clap as loud as possible to make sure that it is in fact asleep!
Q: If the lion is awake, does he live? |
A: As long as he doesn't do anything stupid, yes.
Q: Why choose a lion, of all things? |
A: He's a Leo-Havoc
Q: To be or not to be. That isn't actually a question, is it? |
A: not unles your shakespear
if 31 people get on a bus and then 2 have a get off. how many people want chips? |
A: It all depends on which ones know how to use proper grammar.
Q: Who? What? Where? How? |
A: Everybody dance now!
Q: What do you do when the time comes? - Rexy |
A: I set the clocks back so I've still got a couple of hours.
Q: Do you fear death? Do you fear that dark abyss? All your deeds laid bare? All your sins punished? |
A: I don't fear death, I fear tasty, cookie by-products dipped in slime made from the entrails of a cat eaten by a lion after it escaped from a zoo, then got run over by a redneck who drove a Buick made in Indiana, where a assembly line worker that swallowed a rabbit that was the great, great, great, great grandson of the rabbit Merlin pulled from his hat when he was a child, thus making him a Wizard, and serving King Arthur, was killed in a tragic shmelting accident.
Q: What would happen if I created an alternate universe, and killed myself with a shtick, after making myself immortal in this universe? |
A: Syntax Error.
Q: How many times have you spoken throughout your entire life? |
A: 3.453557652 x 1054
Q: Two men meet in a bar. What is the poledancer's name? |
A: Trick question. There is no spoon.
Q: Question mark? |
A. No, exclamation point.
Q. What's the answer to life? |
Explode.
K? |
No thank you, I am a letter 'Y' fan.
Q: What is the difference between a telephone and an igloo with no one in it? |
A: The igloo doesn't run up your electric bill.
Q: If I were a vampire who just happened to work for the IRS, how old would I be? |