Granted. You lose your 'foot' instead. If you catch my drift.

I wish I wasn't sick.

Granted, your dead and about to be cremated!

I wish I was 18.

Granted. You're an 18-year old.... woman.

I wish Zozo would come online again, and send me PMs.

Granted, but those PM's are all about how much she hates you and doesn't like your name. Or something like that.

I wish I was an 18 year old MAN.

Granted! ...You're gay.

I wish I wasn't sick and that I didn't have to go to bed so #$%&in' soon. >3>...

Granted, but then you go to bed even sooner.

I wish I had 2 of everything.

Granted! You now have eight limbs, four eyes, two mouths, four ears, etc... People are afraid of you and the government sends the military out to capture you and experiment on you. Fun.

I wish my friend wasn't suicidal.

Granted. He is now not suicidal. He is now very angry with you though, and decides to eat you! With his new mouth and throat I gave him!

I wish I had 4 of everything and the military didn't exist!

Granted, but you get raped and shot by terrorists 5 minutes later.

I wish Red Nose Day specials of TV shows weren't so crap.

Granted. They are so good, they are on everyday and Red Nose day is every day of the year just so that all the programs have to be about the Red nose day. And soon, you get punched in the face which gives you your very own red nose!

I wish I had a bending robot.

Your bending robot enter a room with no corners, and thus no surface thats visibly bendable, said robot goes crazy and tries to destroy all that which is circular.

I wish to have a very hideous child.

Granted, but then child turns out nice. Until it strangles you with wire for 1 hour.

I wish for an indestructible armour suit.

Your indestructable armour suit must be airtight, and thus would eventually become too hot or cold to survive in, even with oxygen systems.

Airtight, because it can have absolutely no weak points.

Also, I have been awake for too long.

you've forgotten your own wish your so tired :p

i wish for an 18 inch penis :D

Granted, but it gets chopped of and you now have a 1mm penis.

I wish Warioland 4 had a better ending.

Warioland 4 did have a better ending, he gets some hot broad or some shemale of himself, depending on how you did.

I wish for a bunch of boats with some vietnamese people on fire on 'em.
Ten bucks to anyone who gets that quote.

The Vietnameese people jump into the water. They are mad that you set them on fire, and sink your boat by ramming it with their Vietnamese heads until it sinks. You swin away to Vietnam and are arrested and put in a Vietnam prison with Chubfish.

:)Aww, I share the feeling...Now answer PMs or I eat you.

I wish for boiler...And freezer.

Granted, you get boiler and freezer. They combine and and cause a Supernova. And we all die.

I wish we could survive supernova's and black holes.

Granted, but it's useless to you, as you die before ever seeing any of these.

I wish people would turn into llamas.

They do all execpt you and they all spit on you

I wish for 1000 legally aquired pounds of money

And you are buying Mudokon eggs.

I wish more posts at Oddworld Forums.

Granted, but you get warned for spamming.

I wish I had the power to shoot people overseas.

Granted, but you shoot a picture of a fat naked lady whos in a shower singing, "Burn baby burn..."

I wish I had a bottle of water.

granted, but its Slog sweat instead. MWAHHAAHAHA

I wish for Meeches to come back alive and doesn't eat me nor does anything else bad to me. :D

Granted, but they do something bad to the world and destroy it. Now its not bad to you but you die anyway.

I wish I had a puppy. An evil puppy of doom.

You must do battle with it, and the only way you can defeat it is with a giant mackarel.

I wish for no headache.

Granted, now your teeth ache and the dentist pulls them out and you have to eat mashed up peas for the rest of your life.

I wish for a pet wasp.

It stings you repeatedly, and then you accidentally step on it.

I wish for moar BOILAR!

Boilar cheats on you, and breaks up with you.

I wish for nothing.

And you get nothing, absolutely nothing, for the rest of your life.

I wish my eyeball muscles didn't ache, and that I could think of some other wishes to make other than complaining about my cold.

Your eyeballs don't ache anymore, now your head does. AND you are forced to only post about your cold.

I wish Marvak would get on the chat for the twenty minutes I have. =P

Granted, but you don't tell me which chat it is, and go on the wrong one.

I wish for moolah.

*Gives you a cow* What? Oh sorry I only heard moo.

I wish for the end of humanity.

Granted, but only Democrats are left, and we all know how that goes..

I wish Marvak would finish the art I requested.

he does but its crap
(no offence)

I wish i had a chocolate house in antartica

You can't eat it, and when you try to, your tongue sticks to it. And Antarctica is too unbearably cold to live in.

I wish I could do some big dramatic Stranger's Wrath roleplay with someone.

It fizzles out and dies, and you resort to repeatedly having cybersex and randomly blowing each other up.

I wish that I had a burrito.

It gives you gas and Cal doesn't want to go near you.

I wish I could do more of the intern yaoi fic instead of going to the bathroom.

Huzzah! Granted! While you're doing more intern yaoi fic, you read over and find out you accidently made a yuri fic!

I wish I didn't have to make a wish.

Granted, but the wish-granter takes it to the extreme, and now you can never make any wishes ever again! Making the magic lantern useless!

I wish I cuss, you cuss, we all cuss for asparagus.