Why erotic fan fiction?
I only said that I don´t need sex ANYMORE , because I found a better thing in universe : Portal - The Game .

I didn't mean you. I meant I actually found erotic Portal fan fiction on the internet :|.

Portal's very fun, can't seem to find a way to jump 300 ft though...

I think you just need to open two portals that let you go on for ever until you've dropped 30.000 ft.

but to get that angle is so hard :(

No it isn't. You just make two portals, let yourself fall down one and then let go of the keyboard entirely. On your way down, place the portal again directly underneath you and voila! You won't move an inch if you don't touch the keys on the keyboard, so use that to your advantage.

You can get the "jump 300 feet" achievement in the "inner workings" of Testchamber 19. The set up you need is in the room that has... like... 12 turrets in it. You can make an infinite jump (not fall) loop with your inertia.

I loved the story of Portal. It was simple, and absolutely perfect for a two-three hour game. I felt that all of plot holes were pretty much wrapped up by the end, like what happened to everybody.

If you have any questions about who the heck the main character is, you should check out www.aperturescience.com for documents hinting at certain plot details not present in the actual game (although they are mostly joking and nature... sounding like something GLaDOS would say). Hidden in Portal (the actual game), there is a name and password written on a wall that you can use to access the site itself.

When you open the site, type "LOGIN" to begin. Then you can type in the name and password.

Just two things I didn't get even after the end. Warning, plot spoilers ahead.

1. GLaDOS said she killed everyone in the facility with a deadly neuro toxin and that because of that, people installed a moral inhancer thingy module into her so that wouldn't happen again. So... they just installed the thing and left again or what?

2. What's the purpose of having someone go through a training course and then sending them into a fire? Since the firepit looked like it was supposed to be there I'd assume it was already built into the facility before everyone was killed. Why on earth?!

1: They haven't left, they are watching you from behind those creepy windows.

2: Would you wanna risk having someone tell all sorts of company secrets to your biggest competitor? Besides, it's not really a training course, merely a site where they test the purposes of the Aperture Science Hand Held Portal Device.

3: I have got the Terminal Velocity Achievement, it was easy, throw 1 portal on the ceiling, and below it one on the ground. Jump in, and go watch some TV.
4: Did anyone have any problems throwing in GLaDoS' orange ball? I thought it was hard, cause it makes comments like: Who are you? What is this? Do you smell something burning? (When you leave and get back to it) Oh, there you are! Where have you been? I thought it was cute!

I love the way the turrets react to you: There you are! (when killed) I don't blame you...

AND I loved the song at the end XD.


But... What's up with those strange shoes the character is wearing? It seems like they force her to walk as if she was wearing high heels...

I can't recall the name at this moment, but they prevent her from breaking her ankles from falls.

Spring-wear or summat.

That makes sense :). Thx.

Spoilers, again.

1. According to aperturescience.com, GLaDOS was hastily activated on "bring your daughter to work" day as a tech demo. According to GLaDOS her/itself, she/it proceeded to activate the neurotoxin, killing everyone inside. However, the scientists had six minutes (remember, the toxin took six minutes to activate) to install the "morality" core in an attempt to halt the process. Apparently, they didn't succeed, only installing it partially, and everyone still died. Partial installation also explains why the morality core just... kinda... falls out of GLaDOS when you meet her.

The main character is Chell Johnson (see credits). She is the daughter of Cave Johnson, the CEO of Aperture Science. She was at the enrichment center the day GLaDOS was activated (take your daughter to work day). Apparently, she had agreed to be one of the test subjects in her father's portal project; the test subjects were kept alive in their "relaxation vaults" while the neurotoxin killed everyone else. Taking all of this into consideration, the following quote, which seems innocent when you first hear it, becomes much more sinister.

GLaDOS: "Remember! Take your daughter to work day is the perfect time to have her... tested."

2. The fire pit looked broken out of the floor to me, as if it weren't originally there. GLaDOS was just disposing of the main character after she/it was done with her.

Ah. Well thanks for clearing that up :).

Yeah, the plot is a little on the vague side, but it's the kind of vague that I really like. Vague, as in open-ended enough for the player to have to think about things after playing before everything starts making sense. I like that.

And I love games that break the fourth wall, like the user name and password hidden in Portal.

EDIT: I'm guessing you have TF2 on the PC, Havoc. Did they really nerf the Demoman? I keep hearing some crazy things, like he has only four nades per clip now, and his nades are always timed if they don't hit. That makes him sound pretty much useless. I hope they don't do that on the console version.

I loved how GLaDOS sang that song in the end XD.

No I don't. I don't really like TF as a game series anyway.

FTW!!!

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v2...anioncubes.jpg

Ha, I heard about them. I wish they were structurally more accurate, but still. FTW! Reminds me of those headcrabs, I hope they start making those again.

Me, too, If there was one bity of geeky pparell for me, it would be headcrab hats.

I thought they were just out of stock?

They were, which means that no more have been delivered, because no more have been commissioned, which means no one is producing them. They've been out of stock for months now.

They were quarter-size though, so large enough only for pets and other people's babies.

I hated the Orange Box. One of the perks of working at Gamestop is being able to take games home for four days for free [as 'research'], so I took it home on the launch day.

Half life sucked. A lot. Don't give me a lot of action and intense chase sequences that come to a mind numbing halt while I'm expected to solve a puzzle or open a door. Or raise a ramp. The whole hot and cold gaming experience has always sucked. A transition would have worked wonders.

Portal was also lame. Entertaining, but lame.

Team Fortress was okay, but for whatever reason the servers were really acting up. Severe lag made the game nearly unplayable. Don't blame it on my connection, either. I had five lights on my clearwire box, bitches.

I love the idea of a disc containing multiple games. Unfortunately this one left a lot to be desired. Eat shit, valve.

Damn they did nerf the Demoman, only 4 friggin nades. I cant remember what he used to have, but it was more than that. TF2 is still awesome though.

I really don't see how Half Life sucked, one of the best shooters ever. The puzzles balance it out so it doesn't get stale. Portal, I'm slow so I am bad at it, thus i agree it lame. In TF2, its your connection.

Daxter King said:

I really don't see how Half Life sucked, one of the best shooters ever. The puzzles balance it out so it doesn't get stale.


Yeah, one of the best shooters ever...A few years ago. Plus, the gravity gun made the game way to easy. Also, I wasn't complaining about the puzzles being in the game...It was the lack of a smooth transition from action to puzzle that sucked. It was too abrupt. Also, the puzzles were to repetitive.


And:

In TF2, its your connection.


Incorrect sir. On launch day hundreds of people had lag issues. I understand it's a common problem when tons of people log on at once, but it still left a sour taste in my mouth. I also think the maps were garbage.

hmm
well each to his own i suppose

while i do like HL2 i wouldn't say its one of the best shooters now but certaintly a good 'un

oh and Daxter King just becuase you are bad at a game doen't mean its lame

Yes it does. It should be more accessible to slow people.

Video games shouldn't be dumbed down for dolts like you.

That's what makes a puzzle challenging. Difficulty.

If puzzles and games were easy I'd get bored as hell.

Playing any of the halo series on an easy difficulty is one of the dullest experiences ever. Oh look I won AGAIN

You CAN change the difficulty in Half Life you know...

I like the changes of pace in HL, big firefight and then some relaxing before you run off into your next one. I like it better then being in-fight throughout the entire game.

I enjoyed them too. Though I agree with Yahtzee Croshaw.

zero puntuation rules!!

Ben Croshaw was an arrogant prick at one point, now he's just a narcissistic (sp) prick.

I like the orange box on the 360 due to the "achivements" thing, some are pretty diffcult too, for instance the one where you have to make it through episode one or two ( can't remeber which) using one shot from every weapon (but you can still use the grav gun )

He used to have 6. I was skeptical at first, but I think the nerf wasn't that bad. I can still get kills with him like crazy.

However, I am extremely bothered that he has only four rounds per magazine when there are clearly six rounds on his weapon model. Little things like that just bother me.
You're referring to the "One Free Bullet" cheevo, which is completing episode 1 by only firing one bullet period. And it's actually not so bad, because you can still use the rocket launcher as well.

The hard ones are Portal's "Aperture Science" cheevos that you get for completing the challenges, like "Complete Chamber 13 in under 10 footsteps." I was stuck on the last four challenges for a couple of days, then my 360 died on me, and I haven't played Portal since. I got it back a while ago, but I'm saving myself the frustration and playing CoD4 instead. :p

10 footsteps? hmm, so you can just portal/teleport yourself to places and that wont count as a step?

In the Save One Bullet achievement, do shotgun shells count as bullets?

Yes, that wouldn't count, but you still need to walk small bits, either to walk into the portal, or to walk to a point where you can actually shoot a portal, at least one that is helpful.

Yes. Secondary fire on the shotgun counts as two bullets. But it doesn't matter; the one bullet you fire is the only one in the game that you MUST fire (to open a door), so you can't shoot any more after that.

I hope that's somewhere in the start of the game then, if you miss that shot you're fucked :P.

It is. A couple seconds after you find the pistol and the shotgun, actually. You use them to blow a lock off of a door.

I assume you don't have your crowbar then?