He only puts it in because you actually do it. :p
Stop whining or I'll make him put you in a bikini. XD - Rexy |
Oh she'll do it. She has the power.
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You aren't reading my chat logs, are you? Those were supposed to be private. Damn your uber haXX0r skillz. |
Hehe, nice chapter.
"Actually," Splat said, "You look kind of retarded." Doesn't sound like the sort of thing I would say... What, everybody else is complaining, why can't I?! Good chapter, got a few chuckles. |
Yet another cool chapter, except the 1000-posts area irks me. Vexes, even, cause I wouldn't be allowed in. Grrr...
In the words of Splat, "Everybody else is complaining, why can't I?!". But it's still funny. |
Funny as hell. At this point, I would put in a quote from caboose that is vaguely funny but has nothing to do with this, but I can't think of anything but that nice reel of turd insults. Good job mistur!
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Hooray for this being up and running again! Since I've been gone I hadn't known you'd doen a new fic, but I've read this and it's great stuff as usual. The prologue was cool and different, and the following chapters very amusing. Looking forward to the next chapter, mitsur!
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Well, just got back from snowboarding, so my legs hurt like hell, but luckily my fingers are okay. Even if my head does hurt from taking more than few face-plants going full speed. :dead:
Well, before I can put it off by pretending that I haven't killed Sin yet, or reached Zombie Genocider, or any other way to distract myself, I'll get this chapter up. ___________________________________________________________________ Chapter 3: Bar Fight As Jordan walked over to the breakfast line, Arxryl walked up and promptly sat in the just-vacated stool. "Hey guys," he said cheerily. "Isn't today a great day?" Mitsur was about to answer hat everything wasn't since he had almost been decapitated, threatned, made fun of, and had his fasion sense insulted, in less than one hour. It usually took three to get that traumatized. But instead, he was interrupted by the explosion that occured five feet behind him. He did not so much as glance behind him, and neither did anyone else at the bar. There was a very loud, very high-pitched scream. "Trying to get through the barrier, eh, Seargentbig?" Havoc said. He got a low moan in return. Havoc giggled like a schoolgirl, and they all looked back, to see that Seargent was on the other side of the room, smoking slightly. He got up, and limped to the door. Before he got there, he swung around, a crazy look in his eyes. "I'll be back, and beleive me, I'll get you meddling kids! And your dog, too!" Saying this, he stuffed a Master Cheif helmet on his head, and dashed out the door. They all heard a car start up, and a honk version of La Cucharacha blared out. Then the car drove away. "I don't have a dog..." Splat said faintly. He then got up, burped despite the fact he hadn't eaten or drank anything, and adjusted his tuxedo. "Well," he said, "I have to go to an exotic island and stop a nefarious villian. I'll probably get captured and tortured, so don't wait up." "But Splat-" Havoc began, but Mitsur touched his arm and gently shook his head when Havoc looked at him. Splat did not notice, and walked out the door, and they all heard the A-wooga, A-wooga, of a submarine diving into deep water. Nobody treated this as out of the ordinary, even though OWF did not even have a kiddie pool. "Now, before I got so interrupted," Patrick said, "What do you guys want?" "Give me a bacon sandwhich. Crispy, not as limp as Havoc when he sees a female." Arxryl said. Everyone sniggered, except for Havoc. An extrodinary thing ws happening to Havoc's face. He seemed to be torn between going postal and killing everyone in the cafeteria, and simply ripping out Arxryl's throat, and start laughing maniacly. Of course, no face could show that, but for our purposes, we'll say it could, to save a lot of explanation and embarresment. Instead, we'll just say Havoc stood in place, looking blankly at Arxryl. Mitsur immediately stopped laughing, and his eyes went wide, as he realized what was about to happen. "Patrick, do you still have the bunker function on this bar? You know, the one left over from the Exploding Coconut Incident a few years ago?" He whispered out the side of his mouth. Patrick nodded, pale. "On three..." Mitsur licked his lips. "Hit the control for it. Don't let anyone in, no matter what you hear." Patrick nodded again. "One..." Havoc's face began to twitch. Mitsur slowly rested his hands on the bar, and started to raise his right leg. The rest of the occupants at the bar continued to laugh, wiping tears away from their eyes. The rest of the cafeteria continued on, blissfully unaware of what was about to happen. "Two..." Havoc began to raise his right fist. Mitsur's leg was about halfway up on the bar. Still, everyone was oblivious. "THREE!" Mitsur vaulted over the bar, just as Patrick jabbed at the hidden control. A sheet of metal slammed onto the bar, just as his leg cleared it. A block of concrete followed in, slamming into the polished wood and reinforcing the metal. The metal locked down, and more steel covered the top of the bar, and the back wall. A series of snaps and bangs were heard as all the protection was locked into place, just as a massive roar exploded, muted slightly, from behind the walls. A shockwave emenated from behind the wall, and Arxryl gave a single scream, then was silent. Mitsur felt, rather than heard, all the furniture and members in the cafeteria fly into the air, then land again. A secondary shockwave banged again, and the lights inside the bar-turned-bunker went out. Patrick gave a small squeak, but then the emergency lights kicked in, and silence reigned for a few seconds. Another explosion went out, and a section of the roof above them bent, and dust trickled down through the air. Again, it was utterly quiet. Patrick looked at Mitsur, who nodded. "I think it's okay if we open it up now. Some people may be hurt. Or dead. Or even dancing, I dunno. Whenever Havoc gets pissed, weird shit happens. Remember how scientists claimed Atlantis sank into the sea? That was actually Havoc, after someone told him they slept with Havoc's mom, and she was crap. You won't believe what it cost Alcar to cover that up." Patrick rolled his eyes, not believing, and reached for the button. He pressed it, and all the protection slid away, revealing a crater where the cafeteria floor had been. Everyone who had been in the cafeteria was on the ground, knocked out, and/or wounded. Havoc stood in the middle of the carnage, steaming gently. He was unharmed, and he was holding Arxryl by the scruff of his shirt. "Never," Havoc whispered, "Make fun of me like that again. Or I'll try to kill you." Arxryl groaned an affirmative. Havoc threw him to the ground. He looked up, and spotted Mitsur and Patrick cowering in fear behind the bar. "You guys, never mention this again." He said. "Blame it on Snuzi, or whatever." Mitsur and Patrick nodded. Havoc dusted himself off, and walked out of the cafeteria, just as Rexy came skipping out from behind the serving counter. "Wow, it looks as if a bomb went off in here!" She said, and noticed all the uncouncious members. Her face went serious. "Someone pissed off Havoc again, didn't they?" She asked. Mitsur nodded mutely. "I'll go wake up Gorespatter. He can resurrect anyone who died or whatever. Or at least zombify them." She said, and dashed off to where Goresplatter was lying, moaning slightly, as he clutched his necromancy book. Suddenly, the door to the cafeteria banged open, and Munch's Master bounded in. He surveyed the destruction, and looked confusedly at Mitsur. "What'd I miss?" ___________________________________________________________________ Ouch. That had to hurt, Arx. I just noticed that my chapters are loads shorter than the original. I don't know why, it seems just as long in the posting box. Oh, well. Anyways, there's chapter three. Once again, I'm sorry if there are any spelling/grammar errors, as I'm too wimpy to download the avaliable spell check in the posting box. To top it off, my version of Word expired the other day, so even if I wanted to, I can't spell check. Go ahead and rag on me, since I do it to you guys. :dead: No real notes, once again. Except for the fact I kept revising who insulted Havoc. I kept forgetting who was at the bar. |
I'm still not innit :(
Great story tho. |
What's the death toll now? Casualties? There should be an OWF Employee status board, like at RF.
I just realised: I stormed out of the last chapter before I got to drink anything. And for a guy who thinks he's dead, sustenance is not going to be high on the list of priorities. |
Am I really like that when I'm pissed off? You can't be serious, I'm the most peace loving guy around this pla...
DAMN YOU BASTARDS I'M GONNA F*CKING KILL YOU IF YOU POST ONE MORE SPAM TOPIC!!! I mean come on, like I would kick the entire cafeteria to oblivion just to get to Arxryl... Might make a mess of off-topic... but you know... XD And whats with the bit about my mother, I'd laugh someone in the face if they did that. Most that can happen is I wet my pants laughing, nothing near sinking Atlantis XD |
Okay, I'm going to make it a bit easier (for me, and you) to keep track of who is, and who isn't in the story. That way, I can add you in, and say who already is. Just say you want in, in any form (PM, post, etc.) and I'll hopefully get you in soon. Otherise, go ahead and praise and/or make fun of and/or insult this.
Sometimes, I just add people in for no reason, to add variety. IN THE STORY (in order of appearance): Havoc Splat Mitsur Wolfpac Rexy Alcar Old and Not So Tasty SeaRex Bullet Magnet Goresplatter Snuzi Jordan_Boi Patrick Vykkers Arxryl Seargentbig Munch's Master TO BE PLACED: E'l Scrabino Dripik Nemo scrab queen Statikk HDM This'll hopefully be updated periodically, but in new posts, not edits. Otherwise nobody would notice. If you see any mistakes, or want me to add you, let me know. |
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Sorry, I don't really get included in a lot of things, and when I am I get a little... yeah... |
Great chapter, as usual! ;) More action! Yayness! :p
Maybe you'll eventually get to adding all the active members to the fic, that'd be mayhem! |
Oh my gosh, I just had a horrible vision of you trying to fit all 4000 members in here!
Including the guys who never post! And the n00bs who got banned! Maybe Gore could have a terrible accident and resurrect an army of zombien00bs who bite you and turnyouintoan00baswell!OhtheHORROR!Uh,Igottagobye! *runs* *in a sub* *Or maybe a TARDIS, cus that would rock!* |
Heehee. :D Put Havoc in a bikini. Do it. :D This chapter made me giggle!
Havoc in a bikini FTW. - Rexy |
I start a fight and nearly get killed by Havoc? Like that's something new.
Kidding aside, that was pretty funny! I can't wait to read more. |
Hey, I got in! Hooray! Maybe a little more insane then I'd have hoped, but then again I was probably concussed. And besides, at least I got away before the real carnage . On another note, this has made me wish more than ever that I had known how to spell Sergeant when I joined. Maybe I should get it changed to something else altogether.
I don't think the chapters are too short, but neither would I complain if they were longer. So, eh. Good work, Mitsur. :fuzgrin: |
Whoo! I'm in! thx! (and whatever nemo said!) WHEEEE! *gets all hyper*
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Mitsur wanted me to let you all know he might not be on for a while because of his internet block being reset or something. So no stories in the future with a little bad luck.
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Damn. I love those chapters, I hope he can get back on soon.
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Yeah... hopefully it can all get sorted out.
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Incredibly, after thinking the blocker would last for weeks, it turned out to be only 1-2 days! Stupendous, amazing, wow, woohoo, yeah...
Anyways, I'm sorry making this look like a huge big deal, when it ended up being nothing. |
Heheh... you wouldn't believe why his access was cut off.
Actually, you would, but I'm sworn to secrecy! (The blackmail is still working for me) |
Let me guess, he was looking at porn and his parents now think he's some derailed teenager who is going to worship Satan and become gay?
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EDIT: Well, not the whole thing. It happened months ago, and my parents are still a bit paranoid. My dad reset the blocker on my laptop after doing a routine upgrade the other day, because he found out the blocker was a piece of shit, since it was never actually blocking the porn sites. He got kinda freaked out and reset the blocker to regular mode, which is a web page-by web page block. That meant he would manually have to approve each page, which, on OWF, is impossible, since new pages are springing up every day. But, luckily, I didn't get into any trouble, since I've been a good little sex-abstaining teenager and didn't go to any sites with questionable content. I ragged on my dad to set the blocker back to the usual shitty setting, and here I am, making you all think I'm a total perverted idiot. I'm sorry if this shattered any previous images you had of me. To clarify: Not a fat, lonely, lazy slob of a teen who jerks off to his computer. |
See, that wasn't hard to guess. You need to slap your parents for installing a block like that. Teenagers need their porn, or they will grow up like psycho's!!
Havoc |
The above member is presumably the reason kids are blocked by there parents from porn.
So they don't end up like him. :p |
Touché... -_-
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Fwafwafwa!!1! |
Hmmm, I wonder how in the hell I can be placed. My presence is rarely known here, and whatever I do reveal about myself, is not much, or implies an easilly addicted gamer who wishes to be something, or just a polite, freaky, newb, noob half-breed thingy. wow. What a dillemma thingy.
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Damn. He played the truth card. Oh well. There goes my starring role in the upcoming Bullet Magnet Saves Oddworld Forums And Upstages Everyone Else.
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Well, you could be the occasional spy guy whom no one knows anything about anyways, but at random moments in the story you could say something and then be gone very,very,very quickly. Just an idea. ;) |
Oh goodness... you go there too? Funny site, funny site.
However, it wouldn't seem like you it would seem like Chef Brian and his peanut butter toe-nails. But then again, I am probably wrong... :) |
No, seriously. On friday nights if the grownups are drunk and bored, me and my cousin do a very nice 'high' act. We invented the term "a smirnoff a day, keeps the smirns away!" and we also discovered that pepsi (pronounced Peepsie) is part french and part spanishlandian. so, yeah, I have chef brian moments.
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Pancaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaake.
Lol kwl site. Need chaptorz!!1! |
Uh... Scrabino, you used to have good grammar, where'd it all go?
By the way, nice comics, randomness!! |
Sorry for the delay, but here is the next chapter! At the bottom, I'll have the new list. Remember, post here, email me (xxmitsurxx@hotmail.com) , or PM me to get in if you want.
_____________________________________________________________ Chapter 4: First Signs The cafeteria was almost cleaned up. Goresplatter had resurrected most of the bodies, and the recently brought-back members had helped cleaned up the mess. Mitsur was telling Munch all that had happened, while he mopped up a pool of water from a shattered glass, and Munch swept up the shards. "...and that's how I saved everyone from the explosion." Mitsur finished, and Munch looked up with huge eyes. "You mean it was all the work of Communist peasents? I never would have guessed!" He exclaimed, as Skillya walked up. "Hey guys, what's going on?" She asked. But, before Mitsur could speak, Munch explained excitedly. "Mitsur saved us all from the Communists! He took twenty of them at a time, using his own hands while they had AK-47's! He backflipped, grabbed the first guy by the balls, ripped them off, and started a series of Kung-Fu that made Jackie Chan look like a midget! Then he ate them all alive. Then he killed them. He's frickin' aweome!" "Did you really? I'm so impressed!" She moved closer. "Uh, yeah," Mitsur stuttered. "But first I let out a terrifying war cry. You know, to, uh, terrify them first." "Really? Because it sounded suspiciously like a scream of terror to me," Rexy said, walking over. "And the Kung Fu looked a lot like vaulting into a bunker to protect yourself," she continued, ignoring Mitsur's frantic gestures telling her to stop talking. "What I expected..." Skillya said, shaking her head. Then she perked up. "I suddenly don't care! Who wants to buy a smoothie?" "Oooo! Me me me me! Pick me! Oooooo!" Scrab Queen said, coming out of nowhere and jumping up and down as if her feet were attached to springs. She looked vaguely like a pink Master Chief, and Mitsur speculated on why two members were so enthustiatic about Halo. She flailed her arms out, almost knocking out Snuzi, who had finally arrived. "Well, it looks like for once I wasn't involved in the destruction. And I'd be happy for a smoothie, as long as I don't get something too strong and pass out. I'm trying to stop getting knocked out; I heard somewhere it's bad for your health." "Okay, then! Let's go! You too, Scrab Queen, before you start bouncing into walls." Skillya said, and they all trooped off, Queen giving little yelps of happiness. "Thanks a bunch, Rexy," Mitsur said glumly. "No problem." She replied brightly, and skipped off. By then, the cafeteria had been cleaned. Everyone walked off to do whatever they had been doing before the incident. Arxryl was dragged off, moaning still. Mitsur brushed some non-existant dust from his clothes, and ambled out of the cafeteria. He waved goodbye to everyone, and opened the door to find Bullet sagged against the opposite wall, asleep. His eyes were puffy and red, and Mitsur felt sorry for him. He kept walking, on the way to his room, and encountered Nemo along the way. He was furiously scribbling something in a notebook, glancing back and forth every now and then. He looked up, saw Mitsur, and a hungry look came over his face. He dashed up, notebook and pencil poised to write. "Quick," Nemo said, "I need you to tell me what it's like here! You're writing something, aren't you?! I need some help!" "What, you think this is some kind of story?" Mitsur said. "This is real life. It's better than any fictional tale. Stop writing, and start living!" Tears came to Nemo's eyes. "You're right..." he croaked. He threw the notebook and paper behind him, where they spontaneously combusted. Nemo walked off, sobbing. As soon as he was gone, Mitsur broke out laughing. "He actually beleived that? What an idiot..." Mitsur muttered, wiping tears out of the corner of his eyes. He kept walking, and almost ran into Havoc, who appeared from nowhere. His fake whiskers were loose, and he stank of booze and furry fan fiction. "Yoush ish a mosht beautiful pershon, my lady," Havoc said extravagantly, the slur apparent. "Riiiiiight..." Mitsur said, backing away slowly. Havoc lunged for him, and grabbed Mitsur's shirt tightly. "I sheesh them all the time..." Havoc said to him. Mitsur noticed Havoc's eyes were bloodshot. "Who, Havoc?" "The...the..." "What?" "The...button-pushers..." Havoc said dramatically, and fell to the floor, passed out. "Who let Havoc get into my liquor cabinet again?" A voice behind Mitsur demanded. He whirled around. "Oh. Hey, Statikk. I think he got in himself this time. Feel free to search his wallet, but be careful not to get any...er...tiger juice on you. It takes weeks to get off." "Noted. Now get out of here before anyone sees us talking. Remember what happened in during the Coconut Incident?" Mitsur nodded profusely, and scampered off. ...Behind him, Statikk HDM found a small, red button in one of Havoc's pockets. "Ooo! An easy button; I've always wanted one!" Statikk said, and pressed button, expecting a male, confident voice to say, 'That was easy!' Instead, three doors away, E'l Scrabino's pants disappeared, and a censored box was covering his groin, apparently grown there. "What the hell!?" He said. And thus, it began. ________________________________________________ Ooo, scary! No notes, I think. Sorry to only implement the people in brief parts, but I'll extend everyone's appearance. Once again, I apologize if you beleive that the chapter is too short; I am aware of this, but I'm spent today. Not really an excuse, though. The List: IN THE STORY (in order of appearance): Havoc Splat Mitsur Wolfpac Rexy Alcar Old and Not So Tasty SeaRex Bullet Magnet Goresplatter Snuzi Jordan_Boi Patrick Vykkers Arxryl Seargentbig Munch's Master Scrab Queen Nemo Statikk HDM E'l Scrabino TO BE PLACED: Dripik |
What the hell indeed!
Great chaptor ^.^ Do not critisize my lack of grandma lately. It infuriates me. |