I never pulled back my foreskin cause it hurt

e: this is a good conversation

Anywhooo...

Get an umbrella. Animals have been using shelter to coerce females into sex for millions of years, and it still works. Most girls would rather walk next to you and make small talk than get wet.

I hear taxis are better.

Oh, look at her feet. If her feet aren't pointing at you then she's not interested in you.

I love this thread.

Taking down notes are we?

Hey, advice is advice. Of course.

But I do want her to get wet!

~Badum Tsh!~

You probably shouldn't try to get in her pants at the first date. That was almost certainly a fluke on my part.

I was joking. ...?

It's funny because you weren't. Don't lie, we always sniff them out.

Damn it!

Take the advice given or she'll be dry as an Arabian's sandle.

Remember to rape.

Turn around to her and say, 'My love for you is like the wind, you can feel it but you can't see it.'

So you're suggesting they only have sex in the dark?

I hate sex in the dark.

Sex in the dark: for when there's no paper bags on hand.

I've only gone and developed a crush/become infatuated/started 'like' liking (I don't like any of those terms) on a girl I know again, so now I'm overflowing with soppy feelings. I'm going to send her a rose on St. Valentine's Day, just because I'm awesome like that. I won't tell her it's me, that would ruin the magic, but I'm hoping she works it out.

Ah, good old Valentine. I owe you one mate. Thanks to your martyrdom I get one day where I can be openly romantic without looking like an idiot.

Nah, that's why we got beer bro.

Fuck Valentines Day to hell and back.

Fuck it I say.

I think Valentines day is kinda dumb <.<

Fuck it!

Happy Love Day, everyone!

No it's not, it's a day of morbid love and horrid intention. A day for fucktards and shitheads to scare girls with pages of anonymous wank.

Way to not get pop culture references.

I hate pop, pop is a genre of morbid love and horrid intention. A genre for fucktards and shitheads to swoon girls with pages of utter wank.

I hate Pop too.

Snap and Crackle were always better.

I have a first date two days before Valentines Day. This might be awesome or it might be shite.

It's neither Nate. It's fate.

that was actually an incredible post.

this year i will be doing the same as last year. hanging myself, whilst masturbating and wearing women's lingerie. with a bag over my head. its my annual treat.