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-   -   RIDDLES (http://www.oddworldforums.net/showthread.php?t=18130)

OddjobAbe 06-20-2009 10:01 AM

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Find me a penis with perfectly straight bits.

Straight may not mean physically straight.

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soulmate vagina out there for every penis.

I interpreted it more as "you can put it anywhere, but the intended place for it is a vagina".

OANST 06-20-2009 10:03 AM

I have perfectly straight bits. But then, when alone, I get these urges........

MA 06-20-2009 10:05 AM

mines fucking bent.



physically.

Wings of Fire 06-20-2009 10:09 AM

Learn to wank ambidextrously.

Nate 06-20-2009 06:13 PM

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I come in different shapes and sizes.
Part of me are curves, others are straight.
You can put me anywhere you like, but there is only one right place for me.
What am I?

Hat?

MA 06-21-2009 04:52 AM

good guess, but it isnt the one.

quite a tricky one.

Fuzzle King 06-21-2009 05:00 AM

Is it a jigsaw piece?

MA 06-21-2009 05:03 AM

bingo!

With pointed fangs it sits in wait,
With piercing force its doles out fate,
Over bloodless victims proclaiming its might,
Eternally joining in a single bite.
What am I?

Nate 06-21-2009 06:00 AM

A staple or some sort of paperclip/crocodile clip/bulldog clip thingy.

MA 06-21-2009 09:58 AM

correct with stapler.

I'm sometimes white,
Although sometimes I'm black.
I take you there,
But never bring you back.
What am I?

Wings of Fire 06-21-2009 10:11 AM

This one has to be penis.

OddjobAbe 06-21-2009 10:30 AM

A Ku Klux Klan member wearing shoe polish to disguise himself.

That was in bad taste.

More likely, penis.

MA 06-21-2009 12:39 PM

why do all my fucking riddles revolve around cock and balls? i think i might be trying to tell myself something. :D

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That was in bad taste.

welcome to my world!

Nate 06-21-2009 06:11 PM

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correct with stapler.

I'm sometimes white,
Although sometimes I'm black.
I take you there,
But never bring you back.
What am I?

A compass with a needle painted black and white?

shaman 06-22-2009 12:41 AM

Compasses can be used to bring you back though.
:tard:

MA 06-22-2009 06:02 AM

it isn't compass i'm afraid, even though it would fit.

Wings of Fire 06-22-2009 06:13 AM

Really fucking powerful cocaine.

abe is now! 06-22-2009 06:17 AM

Hi guys, this is my first riddle:
Pierino's mum's three kids, Gianni, Paolo and... ????

MA 06-22-2009 06:29 AM

Pierino.

abe is now! 06-22-2009 06:38 AM

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Pierino.

Shit >.<

OddjobAbe 06-22-2009 06:44 AM

It doesn't help that we've had one that's more or less identical, only with the name "Jack".

abe is now! 06-22-2009 12:07 PM

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It doesn't help that we've had one that's more or less identical, only with the name "Jack".

I have not read the entire thread, forgive me...

OddjobAbe 06-22-2009 12:32 PM

You are forgiven, O Italian one.

shaman 06-22-2009 12:32 PM

What do you call a fly with no legs?????

OddjobAbe 06-22-2009 12:33 PM

Legless.

MA 06-22-2009 12:54 PM

a walk?

abe is now! 06-22-2009 12:54 PM

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Legless.

Legless fly...

shaman 06-23-2009 11:58 AM

MA is correct with "a walk".

As I was going to St Ives
I met a man with seven wives
Each wife had seven sacks
Each sack had seven cats
Each cat had seven kits
Kits, cats, sacks, wives
How many were going to St Ives?

An old classic.

OANST 06-23-2009 12:05 PM

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MA is correct with "a walk".

That doesn't make any fucking sense. Was the question supposed to be "What do you call a fly without wings"?

shaman 06-23-2009 12:06 PM

My mistake :tard: