God No

Seal him in a room with a bunch of Mister Bungle songs playing.

I think I'd rather seal myself in a room with a bunch of Mr. Bungle songs playing.

Invite him to drink as much as he can from your bar. Won’t take much for him to pass out.

Come over at 11 and I'll help hide the body.

That was going to be the main body of my joke before.

dick

How old is the kid?

Seven years of age.

That doesn't sound so horrible. If you don't have time then just tell him so. It sounds like he likes you and just wants to hang out.

Believe me, I've told him a million times. It makes no difference. I think he's being a deliberate nuisance.

Options.
1. Tell him that you forgot how to play it.
2. Tell him that he's not the boss of you.
3. Tell him that your going to die if you hear that song. If he doesn't beleive you then... Fake your death or something.
4. Tell him him that if he stops asking you, you might get him a CD player.
5. Teach him how to play it (If he doesn't want to then just say you can't always play it.) and he'll just play it on his own instead.
6. Tell him that your fingers are too sore to play anything.
7. Tell him you've gotten a note from your doctor. Playing the piano anytime during the next year will cause your finders to fall off.
8. Hand him a good book and get him to read it.
9. Change the subject everytime he says it.

Not the best solutions, but one of them might work.

I appreciate the thought, but believe me, he isn't dense. He knows when I lie. Now, I'm not the sort that let children MAKE me do things, but he isn't here very often, and really, I wouldn't mind doing it, with it being something he enjoys. I just wish it wasn't so often. Do you think he'd like Charles Darwin? if he doesn't settle down to watch Dumbo, he may settle down to read a book.

His interest in this will wane soon enough. In a few years you will wonder who this distant child is, and what happened to the excitable kid who used to love hearing that one song on the piano. But he'll be gone. Gone forever.

You worry me sometimes OANST.

You make something so wonderful sound so depressing. I don't know whether that's a good thing or a bad thing.

Anyway, to shut him up, I made a recording of the original (from a download) and gave it to him to listen to, so he may hopefully prefer that to my terrible piano skills.