I changed my life today.

How are you doing? How is everyone else doing?

Woot. We did it, guys! Now, let's give Dancing Steef a call.

I'm fine thanks BM, still a little scared I've made a bad decision but my Mum didn't really mind at all, my Dad probably didn't really believe me. But it just feels weird, I wonder whether I should take my Bible down from my bedside table.

Also not appreciated Sekto. At all.

Looks like the specific title for what I am is Christian Agnostic, but maybe I'm only a little bit, I really don't know. It's a confusing time for me but I think I'll power through.

Sorry, couldn't resist.

Anyway, congrats. One question though, why do you feel alone if you still believe in God and your parents didn't reprimand you?

Because, I don't know if I do believe in God or not for certain, it's just, if he's not there, that's someone who I always thought was looking after me, not being there...

I guess it must be scary going from being a strong believer to not being sure anymore.

But I always saw it like this: WHy restrict yourself to a set of rules that are outdated anyway? I find agnosticism to be much more interesting than anything. It leaves space for mystery, while at the same time you can just follow your own path and be your own master. This doesn't excempt yourself from a moral code of course. You just need the will to have one by yourself.

Just learn to embrace life by yourself. Having someone watching over can make you feel comfy. But It's my belief that you only truly live when you're the master of yourself and you can be on your own.

Either way, be well Hopefully you will be able to find some kind clarity. I hope the best for you either way.

I once read that the most pious Christians are the ones that are least confident in their belief in a God. That makes a lot of sense to me.

STM would be about the third person I know who thought their faith was indelible, but began to change once they reached a certain age.

Congratulations! I am an agnostic too (well, not officially, I'm not living on my own yet, and I'm afraid family wouldn't agree with my believes, but I do feel like one). I hope you won't ever regret this decision Good luck

I guess I'll be the fourth one

I'm very pleased for you.

I really don't think that's the right kind of thing to say. Try to think of it from STM's point of view.

That's... good. I guess?

I hope everything proceeds well for you.

Your lucky your parents are accepting just as mine were.

My parents only know I'm atheist because I accidentally blurted it out when I was drunk one night.

I think my dad would be disappointed if I actually convinced him that I was being serious, but he knows that over the last year or more I've stopped going to Church except for one occasion when I went of my own accord for my own reasons, I also challenge the Bible and awful lot, pretty much dismissing the majority of the Old Testament, but then you must ask yourself, how can you believe with certainty in a God that created two holy books, one of which seems to be fairy tales and impossible stories, the second is a dated one in which all the laws made in the first are completely overturned. Furthermore I think 2000 years since he sent Jesus, we could do with a little more than faith to believe with certainty.

Err, I just woke up, I don't know if that makes sense or not. Not so scared as I was yesterday, just sort of apathetic about it now I guess, I haven't been struck by lightning yet.

Also:

Acts 20:9 (New Living Translation)
As Paul spoke on and on, a young man named Eutychus, sitting on the windowsill, became very drowsy. Finally, he fell sound asleep and dropped three stories to his death below.

Good for you I guess.

Too difficult. I find it hard enough to believe that people actually believe in the Bible without trying to offer sympathy for them ceasing to.

Well, I'll respect whatever final decision you make. Just make sure you pick a side eventually, dammit.

Agnosticism is a side...sort of, it's nice sitting on the fence. There's a cool breeze and you can see for ages.

Forgive me but this "Christian-agnostic" shit just seems like some sort of compromise between what you, deep down and with some denial, actually believe and what you want to believe. I'd say your in a period of uncertainty, these seem to happen when people have an a great realization of some aspect their life, and are usually quite short-lived. Give it some time and you'll grow into a proper atheist.

There's a chance that the preceding text is just one of my nonsensical, sleep-deprived ramblings.

Wouldn't say non-nonsensical...wrong though, maybe. Yes, that second one.

It's hardly shit, and kindly refrain from telling me what I will believe in the future when you actually don't know me nor how my mind works. You don't even know what led me to this point.

MoxCo., agnosticism =/= atheism. People don't have to either believe or not. Some of them are just not sure or don't care. And it's ok...

STM, assuming from what you said here, you can probably identify with the view called "Agnostic theism", it's something like "I think there's a God, I just don't know about what's his form or what are his behaviors"

And I challenged the Bible a lot as well, I get irritated by the fact that many (and I mean MANY) parts of O.T./N.T. contradict each other (their metaphorical messages)

Yeah, that was one underlying factors that finally caused me to sort of reject traditional Christianity.

We're getting an intimate look at what is usually a private and often difficult transition while it happens, here, guys. A certain decorum would be nice.

Having been born to an athiest family and never subscribed to any spiritual doctrine, I have no idea what you must be going through right now, but I'm sure you have what it takes to sort things out in your own head. You're fortunate to have accepting parents. Not everyone gets to question orthodoxy.

Lol BM put your reading glasses away and stop taking notes ;D

Thanks though

Yeh I guess I am Max, but then, my parents can't force their beliefs upon me, my mother isn't even a practicing Christian really, she was never baptised or anything.

With all due respect, I doubt you'd be acting so nice if this blog was about an atheist converting to Christianity.

You just don't want us to put him off. Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Depend how preachy he was being.

No, I know lots of deconversion tales, and some of them are horror stories. I am aware that at the beginning it feels like your safety net has been yanked away and the power you always thought was there no longer has your back, at that make you feel alone and vulnerable. The confusion early on is especially disorientating when it's a slow burn, rather that an epiphany. This is as opposed to gaining the support and confidence of faith, say.


Truth be told, I'm conflicted. I could be losing a sparring partner here.

Don't worry BM I'm not an atheist, I'll stand up for the notion of God.

A good work of fiction never has more than one character of the same name to avoid confusion for the reader, and yet the Bible has for example, three Mary's. I'm just proving the above point here don't take that too seriously.

This is somewhat shocking. I guess i never expected you to just drop your religion like that. You seemed like such a strong believer.

Okay I'm sorry, that doesn't read very nice. It's just that "christian-agnosticism" just sounds a little bit silly, "I'm not sure whether a deity exist but if they do it is in accordance with this specific scripture". You may became an atheist or an agnostic or even revert to a practicing catholic, I just doubt that you will identify as an christian-agnostic forever.