Kill god, sick frags

Can anyone please translate this for me?

Mac has gone post modern.

Mac is experimental.

Chevre Guervara Burger.

I actually kinda understood this. Dog shit is like winter time land mines.

Sounds like one of his Passenger of Shit songs.

I saw this before he edited, but I didn't actually read it.

I both saw it and read it, it was about Mac eating mushrooms to get high or something... at least that what I think it was

Speaking of, I ordered some magic mushroom spores online, which is apparently perfectly legal.

Gonna grow them pigs.

I've considered doing that for a while. I would really like to try mushrooms but unfortunately harvest season has been over for a while in my town.

But you have to grow them in poo. Literally, that's some good shit.

I was saving this to read for later. Christ's sake.

Yeah, my expectations were crushed too. Mac blogs are usually pretty long and interesting.

This looked long and interesting prior to its condensement.

You grow them in brown rice flour, you ponces. Shrooms no longer grow on poo, at least in the US, because we feed the cows fungicide.

How sad.

That's not even the worst thing we feed them. Though you brits still have us beat in that regard.

Over here you find them in sheep fields. Dem bitches be off their face all d'time.

Hey Sekto, what site did you order your spores from?

My friend ordered them for me. We have a mutual interest in shrooms but he didn't want to risk having them delivered to his house because he doesn't live in the most private/safe conditions. We made an agreement to have them shipped to my house where I would grow them, and I get half the crop for my troubles.

I'll ask him about the site. He told me in passing but I have since forgotten. I'll get back to you.

You should also buy this kit, take some photos, and make me jealous as hell.

The star-rating of that product proves the uselessness of Amazon customer reviews.

I got the spores in the mail. The receipt says they came from this website.

Those are some pretty good prices. I'll bookmark this for now. Thanks.

Yeah they're pretty inexpensive. They come in the mail in a syringe filled with spore-laced water. Besides the box itself, there was no padding except a ziplock bag and a piece of paper explaining the legalities and whatnot.

I imagine they ship it as fast as they can because the spores don't keep. I was taken aback at how quickly they arrived, I didn't even have all my supplies ready yet. Fortunately, they can last in the fridge for up to four months.

What supplies are neccesary? I imagine it wouldn't take much, as they don't need light (from what I've been told) and basically just need a tray of some sort and some brown flour to grow on.

Well, if you want a good crop with guaranteed potency, it takes a bit of care - which is to be expected. I mean, you could throw them in a shoebox full of damp coffee grounds and probably still get something. Doing it properly however can be as complex as surgery, depending on the strain you're growing. The more potent the strain, the harder it is to farm.

I've read several how-to's on the subject, and this one is the most concise and utilizes the most inexpensive materials.

The (incredibly) short version;

- fill some 1/2 pint mason jars with a recipe of brown rice flour, vermiculite, and water

- seal the jars and stick them in a pot of boiling water or pressure cooker to sterilize them and to "cook" the contents into a solidified cake

- carefully inoculate said cake with the syringe

- keep them somewhere warm and dry until the cakes get fuzzy

- remove the fuzzy contents and stick them in a terrarium environment (anything from a fish tank to a tupperwear container), and provide them with plenty of moisture (humidifier or regular spritzing)

Depending on the size of the cake and how much you tend to them, the mushrooms will grow fully within a week or two. Pluck them, dry them, voila.

Doesn't sound too diifcult, even for someone with no skills gardening and such. Thanks for the info.

I have some friends who seriously fucked up growing their own 2 or 3 times over the last year, and each time it's because they missed some really simple step in the setup/sterilisation. It's easy to do, just make sure you do everything in order.

This week, on "Dumb People Try To Grow Mushrooms".
Seriously though, it's easy enough. You barely need a green thumb.