You know those awkward situations you find yourself in in day to day life? Where you or someone else in the room says something and there's a long silence?
How do you deal with times like that?
Well now a solution has been found, a truly awesome solution to garauntee you never suffer the pangs of an awkward silence again!
Next time you find a painful silence in a conversation, fill it with the Awkward Turtle!
And never feel awkward again.
What to do:
Place your left hand on top of your right, with both hands palm-down.
Point your thumbs outwards and rotate them forwards (to form the turtle's flippers).
EXAMPLE
You may choose to, at this point, say nice and clearly, "Awkward turtle!"
By the time people have stopped giving you strange looks and you've explained the wonder of the Awkward Turtle, the awkward moment will be long since passed.
Should you need to use the awkward turtle amongst the same company again, it helps in a variety of ways,
1) Firstly, it lets everyone know that something awkward has been said or done, so no one needs to silently ask themselves "Did (s)he just do/say what I think (s)he did/said?"
2) It will relieve tension and create a feeling of humour that will allow the moment to pass by smoothly.
3) Everyone will think how cool you are for your timely deployment of the Awkward Turtle.
This health and safety article is a st- is brought to you by 'A Jar of Dead Fish Productions': if it's not 'A Jar of Dead Fish Productions', it's not lumber.