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So it took this long?




AG: I don't see how we're supposed to 8e 8ecoming friends if you recoil from my olive 8ranch like I'm twitching a mummified 8ovine phallus in your direction.
CG: BECOMING FRIENDS, WHAT THE FUCK.
CG: WE WILL NEVER BE FRIENDS, MORON.
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So it took this long?

Posted 07-01-2009 at 11:33 AM by scrab queen
For me to have a semi-real reason to bitch, that is. Making this the first *real* blog, out of 90.

Wow.

So right now, we're extremely tight on money. The car's gone to shit, and Mom's starting to panic.

So she calls up my dad at an insane hour of the morning, and what's the first thing out of her mouth?

"What would you think if I just packed up and left?"

It hit me like a fucking brick wall.

My mom is a runner. A coward. As soon as things get hairy, she finds a scapegoat and makes her escape.

More often then not, the scapegoat is my dad.

He mercifully held back all of the shit that he's gone through to feed the family, to make sure she didn't panic and end up hurting people.

So if he says anything about it now, she'll find a way to turn it on him by saying that he pulled it out of his ass at the last minute.

Having replayed a retrospective in my head, with a few blanks filled in by dad, I came to a not-so-startling conclusion.

My mom is a lazy, emotionally fucked up bitch who is one of the biggest actors and cowards I ever let near me, and now I feel like a total twat for not realizing it sooner.

So now it's down to crunch time. Dad is putting his foot down here, and it'll be her turn to shape up, or ship out.

I'm hoping to god she'll take off that metaphorical blindfold and take accountability for all the things she's fucked up, rather than pointing the finger and running the other way.

And up untill this point, I was able to ignore most of the crap that went on around me.

But this is heavy shit, man.

This is something I can't ignore, by drowning in humor and some other fantasy land.

I look at it, and it's making my eyes bleed.

I can feel my soul turning black.

I can feel the sterotypical bullshit sneaking up behind me.

I need to be able to walk away from this a completely normal person, and still make the flight to see my Aunt, in a week. I need to scrounge up some sembalance of social skills, and just retreating into myself is not an option if I want to avoid awkwardness. I need to be able to hold a conversation for more than five seconds.

The thing is, my Aunt is like a teenager in a 20-something year old's body. And she's had everything handed to her on a silver plattter. She's one of those stupid manager types, so If I try to explain the intricacies of time traveling in Legacy of Kain, and why vampires are not supposed to sparkle, the I'm afraid her head will explode.

I don't have a life to talk about.

*insert extreme panic attack with hyperventilation*





tl;dr version:



SOMEBODY PLEASE VERBALLY SMACK ME SO I DON'T TURN INTO AN EMOTIONAL BITCH!
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Comments
Fuzzle Guy's Avatar
My Mum is a mixture of yours and your Aunt. And for the majority of the problems you've made in your blog, I can empathise.

However, I've never been someone who can say the right things or can real deal with genuine emotion or serious conversation. I struggle for words and never really know what to say. =/
Posted 07-01-2009 at 11:51 AM by Fuzzle Guy

Wings of Fire's Avatar
You have parent issues, stop being ultra paranoid, stop thinking yourself superior to those around you and man up a little.

Wow, I sound like such an emotionally insensitive dick.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 02:05 PM by Wings of Fire

MA's Avatar
woah, steady there WoF.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 02:17 PM by MA

Wings of Fire's Avatar
Let me elaborate, I can't pretend to know your family, but what I do know from the way you've expressed yourself there is that something has happened, which may have been building up for a long time, which has made you seriously question your faith in your mother. Now you might have always favored your father, due to how you were brought up but as a child of a single mother who has done nearly everything for me, and being able to see friends situations with their parents from outside the box I can tell you that being a mother is probably the hardest thing in the world and sometimes shit happens, but shit is shit, it happens and it passes, before long nobody even remembers the smell.

The best thing you can do for your father and indeed for your whole family at this point is to do your bit to keep your family together, parental ties bind both ways, believe me I know.

Oh, and your aunt didn't get and hasn't remained being one of 'those stupid manager types' by being a ditsy teen. Maybe you should get to know her more.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 02:27 PM by Wings of Fire

MA's Avatar
i retract my comment.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 02:42 PM by MA

bobtheguy's Avatar
just don't take either ones side, and by the way I doubt your mom would actually leave just because of a lack of money. My family went through something vaguely similar to this and my mom and dad are still together.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 02:57 PM by bobtheguy

used:)'s Avatar
So, are you ever gonna......you know, post?
Posted 07-01-2009 at 06:53 PM by used:)

bobtheguy's Avatar
are you talking to me?
Posted 07-01-2009 at 07:53 PM by bobtheguy

used:)'s Avatar
No.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 07:56 PM by used:)

bobtheguy's Avatar
okay, I didn't think you were.
Posted 07-01-2009 at 10:03 PM by bobtheguy

 

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