I just shit myself in the kitchen.

‘Shat’, my dear. Conjugate.

Was anyone else present?

Yes, three people, thankfully all of them male.

I was sitting on a seat when I noticed the seat of my dressing gown go wet, to which I thought 'Oh shit', after immediatly standing up I was thinking 'OH SHIT!'

YAY

ROFLMFAO!!

Seriously? Even when I have it really bad I get prior warning at least ten seconds in advance.

hardcore diarrhea indeed... hope you get better soon

At least it didn't drip down your leg, into your sock and filling up your shoe

There's a playground song that paints such a picture. I wish I could remember it.

Who wears a dressing gown and shoes at the same time?

Every time my housemate sees me in my dressing gown, he asks ‘Saving the world again?’ It’s irritating,but not as irritating as what he leaves in the bath.

Just down my leg onto the floor with people watching.

I can see why. Why would you wear a dressing gown to save the world? Bewildering. Unless perhaps you were called upon in the night, and there was no time to get dressed. But then, I don't expect you would have time to even hear such mindless statements, since, lacking the time to get properly dressed before the world's hopes and prayers are unceremoniously thrust upon you, you wouldn't exactly stop to say "hello".

All in all, I think you show great restraint in merely growing "irritated," as opposed to, say, "militant".


In quoting that post originally, I came by a hitherto unnoticed nugget of information hidden in the post. Thanks for sharing.

It how you handled the situation that counts.

Pooping is bad

Last week my mum had to drink some horrible stuff to clear herself out for a colonoscopy. The day was punctuated by "Ohgodohgodohgod" as she ran for the toilet along with the occassional "Oh crap, I did it in my pants".

My mum doesn't possess a TMI sense.

If she inhabited the Discworld, she would have birthed (or more probably, worshipped the already present) Excrementia, the Oh God of Crapping One's Pants, an enviable divine role if I ever heard one.

Anoia will always have my heart and soul.

I like Sweevo.

Feces is the most entertaining of all bodily excretions.

Wow, what's acute diarrhea?

Alcar...

Technically, it's not an excretion at all. Excretion is the expulsion of the waste products of metabolism, so: that of your cellular chemistry, mainly respiration but also that of other metabolic pathways. The main organs of excretion are the kidneys and the accessory urinary organs, whereby the majority of nitrogenous waste (produced from the ammonia that is in turn produced when amino acids are converted into carbohydrates suitable for respiration) is excreted, but also the lungs, which excrete carbon dioxide, and the skin, which excretes urea and lactic acid.

The expulsion of faeces is not excretion because faeces is indigestible food (mainly cellulose- fibre), not a metabolic waste product. The proper term for this is "egestion," as opposed to "ingestion" and "digestion".

Compare excretion to secretion, in which the secreted products have an intended function after expulsion. Mucus, for instance, or digestive fluids.

Who fucking cares? I'll excrete feces whenever I please, thank you.

You know, like when you're in a bar and you spot a diarrhea that has that special something-something...

I lol'ed. That took guts to tell us.

Diarrhoea is one of those special nouns without a singular or plural form.

You know, acute diarrhoea is actually a common cause of death in developing countries, and the second most common cause of infant deaths worldwide.

Woah seriously? How can it actually be fatal?

post a pic!

Okay, now I'm just worrying that you didn't get the extremely bad pun I was trying to make.

You make me a happiness.

Alternatively, he was replying to the blog author.

*thinks for a second*

That would be too logical. Please disregard my last statement.

...Sorry, that pun was accidental. Honestly.