It's amazing what Blur has done for peoples personal lives. Its actually hard to believe it's actually possible for it to do more than it should be. An amazing game! After the AAA clan leader had met the family he thought he never had because of Blur and writing about it on Facebook I've been inspired to write the story of Blur and its involvement with the scariest moment of my life so far. My coming out. Sure Blur has been a major part of my gaming life to. Being part of a clan. Getting paid and getting to the highest spot I have ever been on a game leaderboard (25th out of 250,000+ as I write this) and meeting a load of awesome friends on the way but that’s not what this is about.
The game that changed my life
Before we get started on Blur we have to go way back. Actually believe it or not back to the time I had just gotten back on Xbox Live after choosing to remain inactive for a year. Believe it or not I was once Homophoebic. Now I know the general conception is that those who are homophobic are bicurious but in my case it was.......yeah true....a stage of denial I suppose. I'm not sure what triggered my immediate hate for those who prefered the same sex but when a close friend of mine came out as Gay I knew I had to change so we could remain friends. I then realised that all gay people are just the same as others on the outside (If only everybody realised this). When I was about 14 I become bicurious. I'm not exactly sure what triggered this but it was a horrible time of my life. Hidden in silence it was a battle of shame, guilt and confusion. About a year later when I was 16 I realised I was Bisexual (Yes I am gay now but all is explained if you keep reading). It still felt rather confusing but I was certain that I was attracted to both sexes. The next part of this story is actually about Split/Second. Split/Second and Blur were due for release at the same time and I watched both closely and decided that Split/Second would be the game for me as I thought Blur would be crap simply because I never liked any other Bizarre Creations titles.
My life would have been much different if I chose this game instead
Whilst browsing around on Gamespot one day there was an advert asking for 10,000 beta testers for the Xbox 360 version of Blur. Despite the fact I thought Blur was goona suck I thought to myself. Well why not give it a try if I don't like it I haven't lost anything, and signed up. So I eagerly awaited the day that me and 9,999 were given the lucky chance to test Blur. After the very first race I decided that Blur was definitely the way to go and I had an extra reason as well after playing the Split/Second demo and realising how shit it was.
It didn't take long for me to realise how awesome the game was
So were finally onto the part where I was playing the full version of Blur. When I picked up the game on its release date never did I ever think for a second that it would change my life (and for the better) in such a massive way! I was in a lobby one day waiting for a race to finish, because I was feeling bored I thought I would randomly take a look at peoples gamercards.
Because when your stuck looking at this you gota do something to pass time
There was one person I thought had a funny bio so I messaged them saying how I found their bio funny. We got talking and became friends. If it hasn't crossed your mind this person is my ex boyfriend. After making a gay joke he revealed that he was bisexual. I felt a bit guilty finding out by making a gay joke but he was fine with it. So I made out to him that I was bicurious even though I was certain of my sexuality at this point. We made arrangements to meet so that I could “Try”. However I revealed myself to him truly and we fell in love. I knew the next step from here and it was the most difficult part.......coming out the closet. We had arranged the day I would do it but waiting for that day felt like forever because I felt so scared (Wouldn't you be?) and I knew I was hiding a really big secret that would come as a shock to everybody. I took a bit of a chicken way out. I did it over the phone. I was going in blind unsure what reaction I would get off my parents. If shit was to kick off. I would be safe....... I had mixed reactions from my family. Some were accepting. Some were dickish and some were inbeetween. Needless to say it was good to finally get it out. I thought that typing one message on Facebook would be easier than going around all my friends one by one and telling them but clearly not because most of the idiots didn't bother reading it! Anyway ranting over. So the bisexual part? Well it came to my realisation that I am gay just in case you got a little confused about my sexuality. Sure I was madly in love with my boyfriend and our relationship is no more. But it was a big part of my life I'll never forget. Especially considering the weird way in how we met and how a computer game got us out of the closet. But that's all in the past now. I have somebody else much better to love and love me back in my life now. However this time we didn't meet on a computer game. I'll keep on bluring. For love or no love! But Blur will always be a reminder to me of how it has helped my life. It just scares me to think how different my life would have been if I didn't play the Blur beta.