I had my final final today. It was a week after my second to final final. I had a whole seven and a half days to revise to it, which was a nice change of pace given that the first five of six finals were paced over six days (With three in the space of two days!)

So

I am done

I finished university

Not officially of course. I officially finish university when I graduate on June 29th, but I'm practically finished now and just have to laze...

Since the start of the year I've been doing pretty cutting edge research to see what degree artificially fucking with pupil sizes (non intrusively, making participants do tests wearing glasses with pinhole size lenses) can emulate the effects of the degredation of the visual system (of old people) in young participants.

Testing was a lot of fun. I got to play around with equipment worth thousands of pounds, learn how to read brain imaging data, how to work in a lab team and other...

So for the last couple of months I've been pretty heavily working on my dissertation/project Psychology thing. We're analyzing the effect of manipulating an artificial pupil size to emulate the effects of aging in young adults. It's really cool and I've gotten to use EEGs, ERGs and all kinds of cool shit.

My birthday wasn't terrific unfortunately. I didn't manage to get down to the library to do some work and tried to cook a pizza in my oven for the first time ever. It sort of burned...

You guys know the drill.

So after missing all my lectures thus far this year, not unpacking after three weeks at my flat and waking up in a cold ridden daze at 6:30pm yesterday I decided I'd had fucking enough of this and was going to start being in control of my life again.

So this morning I

Brace yourselves

Whilst doing my morning shopping I

Wait for itttttt

Went outside without a coat or jacket on.

I know, pathetic right?
...

Friday 13th

4am: Finish revising for the night

5am: Wind down, watching a show or two and IRC chatting

6am: Go to sleep. Take sleeping tablet instead of wind pill and set alarm for 11:30am to catch psychologist appointment at 12:45

3pm: Wake up. Feel terrible and drowsy. Realize my mistake. Curse myself.

4pm: Lick my wounds and revise. Have breakfast and other shit

6pm: Watch a movie to break the revision monotony...

Back in 2008 she developed cancer in her lungs which was treated and disposed of. Late last year it came back, and it got to the point where the doctors couldn't treat her any further. She lost consciousness in a hostel and stopped eating and drinking four days ago. My mum and my uncle were constantly at her side. And just now my mum phoned me to say that she stopped breathing two hours ago. I could tell the news was coming because when I picked up she was trying not to cry for my sake.
...

Is such an amazing word.

My counsellor said this to me today.

No really.

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