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hashtag me too or whatever
Posted 08-21-2018 at 11:35 PM by Zozo the Zrilufet
Pretty much just doing this because I'm having a shitty night then disappearing back into the wherever people that don't post again go.
not relevant to me: havoc literally had a post where he mentioned 'relations' with a 15 year old at 21, idk the specific numbers but yanno dude casually admitting to statutory rape. Idk if that resulted in much beyond the odd lolpedo heckling but idk wtf people expect from "dude thinks a fuckn animal can consent to a human" anyway. I'm like a decade late on this shit so whatever this post is useless and I don't have proof worth a damn because who even has MSN chatlogs anymore. Venks is...I can't really say a 'non-offending' pedophile? Dude was three years older and like...idk have bulletpoints. It's half 7 I'm hungry and I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. Context: was three years younger than this dude throughout everything. Prior to 18: * Literally erped digital penetration right in front of me without asking in a group chat. I...don't think he asked the other person either, honestly? It was one of those joke-emote-progression sequences, I leave chat, 'o sorry i forgot you dont liek x', whatever. I forget if the person was my age or closer to his but gross. * Uhh admitted to his sisters being raped with a smiley face, I guess it was a gallows humour/contrast thing but not his fucking experience to gallows humour about. * Character A trying to drug character B with an aphrodisiac, I just go "oh because of slig biologies it Doesnt Work lol". Whilst fiction makes for a lot of consent trope issues that wouldn't be possible in real life and people can fuck up on those occasionally...that's just fucking suspect as hell. * Some stupid drama thing where he had a writing thing that 'might be xtreem', im like "lol i has no innocence show me" because I'm probably fucking fourteen at that point, bam period sex PM. Of course I'm ?!? and contact a mod and he's just "but i sed it would be xtreem" yeah I don't care to look over the PMs honestly even it was wiggly-vague its' stupid. * Honestly there was this general vibe where I'd just...be kind of ignored a lot of the time unless I brought up something sexual. That got unhealthy fast. * Letting folk know he was into the childrens. Like...yeah, as I say further down, going "oh but x is a ~nice pedo~" sets people up for dropping their guard and hurt. * He changed his fucking MSN display icon to a naked anime child with a distressed expression and a hand on her, I asked what was going on in the picture, 'non-con'. Yeah. Just...casually show everyone on your contacts list a segment of a child rape scene, a+ great idea. * eh I vaguely recall he had some post like 'can a rapist be redeemable' on the forums and in light of everything else that's sketchy. * The more I reminisc...remm- remember shit, there was a general trend of the rp forum posts being too explicit in some way. Posted disembowlment/hypothetical of a character being torn apart at one point and a mod had to edit it out, a character p. aggressively coming on to another ("maybe you should check inside my dress" tier tmi)...yeah unfortunately It Got Worse. * something something joke about going where the legal age was twelve. oh and that he'd fuck a dolphin except not really because 2scared2drown we're not really dealing with a bastion of consent logistics, trigger warning the-word-rape mention ahead. * He had an EdgyEvilUndeadRogue, I ask what she'd do to one of my crackfic characters' babies expecting maybe a Richard the Warlock tier joke. The answer was pretty much 'violently rape with implement' and I'm not fucking joking, 'their blood can be the lube'. Because of the 'well i asked i guess' logic I either don't feel or don't realize I can call him on it. Idk where exactly in the timeline this goes but yeah... * So I suck at timelines but...I would webcam wayyyy too easily with people, and the dude fucking screencapped poses that accidentally looked too-much-emphasis tier sexual in some way. Didn't ask, just fucking compiled me angling the wrong way into a fucking folder. I jokingly call him a pedo and he deletes, I ask why and he's offended/upset that I called him a pedo I guess. Um... after 18: * yanno, I get a person hitting eighteen can have the 'wow i sure dont feel like i magically metabolized into an adult/sure feel the same' effect. But...Yeah an eighteen year old shouldn't date a fifteen year old. (Or dump them after nine days through a message relayed via my then-best friend but that's more just kind of hilariously awful at this point) Like...we weren't really on the same level, if you remember my posts back then I was very hyper-bouncy-immature and they weren't. If you look at a person that emotes Srs Cat descending into an Oddworld rp to declare the scene 'srs bsns' and go 'this person is obvsly mature enough for a relationship on my level' then I don't know what to tell you. * Because everything has to get worse: the dude godmodded a rape scene when he was eighteen and I, yanno, wasn't. In hindsight, given the 'past rp' specifics I think he was tired of Rping the characters' relationship and wanted a way to effectively cancel it which he did by...rping that the other orchestrated their rape in generic rp highschool? (which...doesn't hold up unless the characters involved did fucking time travel) Basically, Rped the scene, only responded when the character kept going towards what I would later find out was a stupid fucking godmod trap, character grabs her, character emotes raping her one emote after whipping his dick out. Again, I'm a kid, the dude was supposed to be my friend and I didn't know how to respond so like a lot of Rpers regret doing I just...'deal with it ic', emote the characters' response but I'm not happy. If this shit happened nowadays then yeah I'd go wtf and bail on it hard. After mine does the blank-out response they just stopped Rping it. It was all pretty fucking pointless. To add shit to the shit sundae they later went "oyeah other npcs saw laughed and took pictures", "o i thought he couldnt rape her anyway because [insert weird biological quirk I had for that character]". This...yeah. This fucking tanked the friendship that should have been dropped sometime after 'im a pedo' and before...that. It was a bitch to process, eventually I came across an article called rape in rpgs, it had a handful of flaws but on the whole was good for 'this was not okay, "but its what characterbob would do" does not make it okay as an element to spring undiscussed'. Sooo...I link that, I talk about it. "i wont let rp rulez change/restrict my rps" ...yeah. Not an exact quote but I remember the flippant z just fine. I typed up a message I ultimately didn't send because this guy was such a fucking lost cause and removed him from contacts. That should have been the end of it. ...annnd that wasn't the end of it because either months or years later, apparently because he's a collossal dumbfuck, he emails me out of the blue. Can't copypaste that because I deleted the thing but the sent item of my scathing response remains in a folder somewhere. Seriously, no apology, just "hello personIhaven'tbeenincontactwithmonths that dropped me because I was a collossal fucking creep, I'm gonna say hai like everything is hunky-dory and drop in that I've had dreams about you because that's not fucking creepy and sounding overly invested or anything". He also sent me a poke on my deviantart profile because I guess desperate mcgee had to cover all the bases. https://comments.deviantart.com/4/2688836/1766360455 My responses are Weird because when I initially responded I was still having a religion-related breakdown but yeah that'd get offtopic to elaborate on. ...And that was it, I guess. Why post this a decade later? Fucked if I know. I ran into so much Creepy Adults that an unfortunate side effect was absorbing "oh talkin about Weird Shit to friends is just Normal rite" which has definitely set me back in terms of processing because "oshit does this mean im a hypocrite if i talk about or acknowledge anything not appropriate ever now". (po/cd is such a bitch honestly I don't wish the existential crisis on anyone) It sucks, you go back and forth on 'do I get to be a person or nah'. http://jenroses.tumblr.com/post/1604...u-get-the-more first two posts articulate my point better about how people just...need to process and be aware? I think the point of this mess was: having "I'm a nice pedo that only looks at the lolis no really" in the same space as a forum with kids/teens/whathaveyou is a really fucking bad idea. You can't monitor that shit at all once they start PM'ing and if they add them to a chat program its' out of your hands, the worser ends of tumblr tried the "teehee nice pedo we're maps and dont touch kiddos" shit until a couple of them had to come out and admit "oh actually a lot of people in the Not Offending Pedo community actually offended/were creepy in some way, welp". I can't claim to know how it should be managed beyond 'crossover with spaces with kids in them = bad'. "why do you know this" because po/cd and morbid curiosity is a bitch. seriously tumblr literally has a 'hi im a pedo' community on it rip. I feel a lot less shit now that I've got this done n' dusted so there's that. For the record, I don't blame the mods for all the shit that went down when he was added to IMs. I think it was seriously naive to keep any of the lolicon enthusiast types around for long but well, I fell for that fallacy as well. I think most of the internet was for a while but thankfully there seems to be more backlash nowadays. That was all, I really need to go sleep now or something. I'm just gonna log out and not check back after this so yeah, no plans on rejoining the community I don't think I wanna remember my teenage-years Rp posts anyway lol. |
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Recent Blog Entries by Zozo the Zrilufet
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