Lord Vhazen thinks his opinions are way more important than they actually are

So I finally started watching the new MST3K reboot series on Netflix, and I felt really... internally confused. So I decided to fuck off and write a letter to them, explaining my problems with the show and how they can work on them. If you don't have any idea what MST3K is then fuck off, you don't want to read any of this. :u

"I'm still in the process of watching this (literally in the middle of the first episode) and I gotta say it was destined to be a bumpy ride. Some things are gone, many things are different, and we'll just have to adjust over time. Visually, I say the style of the show is doing great so far. But I have to agree with many of the complaints people have about this revival - the commentary is WAY too try-hard, and feels too scripted.

For example, about 15 minutes in to the first episode, there's a scene they riff where the camera is trying to focus on a magnifying glass lamp thing, but it's distorting the rest of the scene and the camera keeps switching focus. This was obviously the movie's own incompetence in cinematography, and worthy of a jab from our cast, but they made their joke literally the EXACT instant the scene transitioned to this sloppy shot. It was too soon for the viewer to even realize what was happening on screen, and there was no warning for this since the movie itself completely changed its context from one scene to the next. All in all their joke happened too fast for the viewer to even get it, there's a half-second delay before you even realize what they were making fun of, so they were obviously anticipating this screw-up in the movie - something the audience could never do. What's worse is this mistake on the show's part could have easily been avoided, because this movie's scene experienced this technical error for at least 4 solid seconds - much longer than the millisecond of time the bots gave us. It's a small thing, but pacing errors like this seem to litter the show. And though I'd like to be forgiving, I also firmly believe that you should critique when you want someone to improve, and this is something that needs improving. It's not just because the show's humor is more modern - they're clearly trying to avoid being boring, but in doing so sometimes they make the delivery feel a bit unnatural.

It's not all bad though - the humor itself, for the most part, feels just as strong as it ever was in the original show. I just think there's a lot of things they say that should be cut, it feels like in an attempt to appeal to younger audiences, they're trying to avoid having too long of spaces in between their lines. An understandable move, but they'll have to tread lightly, and make sure it doesn't feel too tryhard. When I was a kid, I loved these guys, but because I was a kid, I was an idiot, and I tried - and failed very badly - to mimic their witty humor. I made myself annoyingly over-talkative during movies (at home, thank god not in a theater) in a desperate attempt to mirror my comedic idols, but came off as really desperate for attention. Honestly, you get just a bit of that vibe in this pilot episode - like the new cast is trying to mirror their idols and trying way too hard. They gotta take things slow, and find themselves for who /they/ are instead.

I also gotta say I was really shocked at how they didn't try at all to create any kind of narrative or prepare us at all in any way shape or form for this. In the actual show I mean. When the original show was dropped from the network that used to air it, it went into production hell for a few months or years or however long it was because no one was buying it, but in responding to their fan's demand, Syfy revived the show and introduced to us a new narrative, with a new setting. We saw Pearl here along with the rest of the new mads and their dungeon, and the show had a brief joke where they revived Tom Servo with defibrillators, making a parody of generic medical soap-operas while making self-aware jokes about their new network. It was golden really, and I think they handled the revival much better then. It was rushed, because they didn't wanna give us an original movie or even a full movie of the characters on the ship by themselves, but they still managed to explain the new setting just quick enough to then start up the old game again, sending Mike Nelson and the bots on their first new movie sign. It just felt...right. This time though, we're basically thrown right in the middle of the new setting with just one odd moment of two company-people admiring the new guy as he phones-home from his ship, then he gets kidnapped by the new mads, and he lands on a moonbase that's in the middle of some kind of disaster. Then the mads explain that this is where they're gonna send him new movies now and use him as a test subject, and then it just sort of... starts. The new guy then, not even playing in-character, introduces us to the new show and its characters, and then the movie sign just starts. This did not feel right at all, I have to say. It was sloppy, and it just didn't give a shit. It really didn't feel like they gave a shit about explaining any of this to the new generation, it's completely incoherent - even for the show's original style.

Some people say things improve as the episodes go on. I'm inclined to believe that, but I'll have to see for myself. Who knows - maybe they already realized most of the things I'm mentioning, and addressed them - but more than likely they will need to work on these things over time with each new season. As a fan of this series since being a child, I'm more than willing to give them a chance. All in all, even if the show isn't as good as it should be, just support them until it does, please. This is our one and only chance we've had to get these guys back. Just keep supporting them, and note your concerns - let your voices be heard so maybe they can work on the show to make it truly great. It's not just them though - some of it will be on us. It was never going to be exactly the same show, we will have to adjust to some things.

For example, FUCK OFF about Gypsy's new voice. No really - shut the fuck up. That's one of the biggest complaints I've seen and I'm sick of it because it's unimportant. Get over it. The thing about Gypsy was she was always meant to be the "dumb oaf" of the show, with an annoying and inglorious voice. Yeah that had its uses, and maybe they still need someoene like that on board, but the new Gypsy voice is not distracting in the slightest - hell the original character was way more distracting than anything because she was meant to be awkward. The new voice just makes her sound like some random woman - nothing special, nothing intolerable. She's not overly sexualized - they didn't turn her into Jessica Rabbit for no reason, and though it wasn't completely "necessary", as most people bitch, it doesn't feel forced AT ALL. I just can't believe the one thing people keep focusing on is her. It's the least important change we've seen in the show as far as I'm concerned.

Anyway, I wrote this because I was both inspired and concerned. I'm just starting this show, and I haven't formed a real solid opinion yet. But I felt that this all needed to be said, at least about the first episode. If things are drastically different as the episodes progress, I may make a follow up to this critique. Until then though, I wish you all the best - the viewers and the show. This is one of my favorite universes, and it really was one of the single most influential shows ever to air on TV. Though it was not technically the only of its kind, I think it was MST3K that inspired much of what the internet has become today - really, I think the idea of this kind of commentary caught on in so many different ways that no one could have predicted. From the most controversial and laziest forms (reactionists), to let's players and to independent critics and beyond, this show touched many more lives than just mine. It changed the world in ways that I think most people take for granted, or don't even realize. And for that, you still have my undying loyalty, and my thanks."