Happy Fucksgiving

I'm fuckful for all of you guys.

I'm British.

That's the thing where you worship turkeys, right?

It's where they celebrate a meal they shared with Native Americans, whom they later betrayed and massacred in the millions before putting the survivors in shitty little plots of land. Not gonna lie though, we did it to 2/3 of the planet so it's not like British people have a historical moral high ground.

At least nobody fucks with us anymore.

You talk about your poor sex life like it's a good thing

Our Thanksgiving was over a month ago. You didn't see us Canadians blogging about it!

I could go for some turkey right now though.

Turkey's crap, I don't know why everyone creams their pants over it. It's just a big chicken, except it's really dry and the skin tastes like shit. Turkeys have nothing to give, not even their useless existence.

E: That sentence made more sense in my head.

Nepsotic is crap, I know why no one creams their pants over it. It's just a big chicken, except it's really dry and it has shit taste. Nepsotic has nothing to give, not even its useless existence.

E: This is the perfect sentence.

Turkey's the best.

I only have Turkey at Christmas and it's really not great.

Turkey is fine. It's a change.

Turkey, mashed potatoes, stuffing, gravy, apple pie...

I wish we had two Thanksgivings a year.

Just celebrate Christmas properly then.

Three then.

That actually worked amazingly well.

Turkey legs are yum

Just to be clear, nobody in America actually gives thanks on thanksgiving. It's just an excuse to eat slightly more than we already do, and we do not deny this.

Sounds like my kind of holiday.

You haven't seen the nauseatingly twee spunkbubble that is my Facebook news feed today.

Oh no, trust me, I know exactly what you mean.

Still, giving half-assed thanks on your wall or reposting some relevant but not very clever picture is the barest minimum level of gratitude owed.

Id lile to thank you all for having organs.. Delicious organs that i will steal soon.

You know what I'm thankful for? My PC! Do I get a cookie or something now?

You can have a good ending. Ask OANST about it

I gave a fuck. It was received.

And I hope you all enjoyed my twee spunkbubble status on Facebook.

Hope you're not talking about Nepsotic

I'm the pitcher.

It had enough profanity and optimistic pessimism to get by without being too overly twee.

You sir, have not had a properly cooked Turkey before.

I prefer turkey over chicken

I'd like to give thanks to the Romans that invaded us Brits long ago and whipped our asses into shape. We sure needed the empirical influence. And the Germans, and Scandinavians, and French. Along with many other, those guys rock. Woo.