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I am blogging. Not reading NC-17 yaoi fanfiction.
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Spiders, Spiders everywhere

Posted 09-24-2010 at 09:17 AM by Dixanadu
So yeah, everything goes dandy dandy when all of a sudden on Wednesday evening, a spider sat on the frame of my bathroom door. Big deal, I ignored it, pissed, and went out.

Came back, he wasn't there. Once again, big deal went in my room and watched TV. It was dark, but you just know when you see the dark spot on the wall, flicked my lamp on, and there was the spider. At first, I thought it was the one from before. But no, this one was bigger, blacker. I panicked, the bastard was huge, but I managed to kill him with the game-case of justice.

Next morning when I awake, I see movement above my curtain. Another one, this guy's a bit smaller. I ignored it, until it moved downward, toward my bed. I sat up, and killed him.

Went to piss a few hours later, one in the bathroom! He was on the ceiling, I assumed he was the one from the day before, I left and went out.

Came in for the night, went to the fridge for some food, laid it down on the counter. I freaked out because I was this close and never realised, a monster of a cunt on the floor, just standing there. Stood on him, and sighed. Went to bed.

Today, bathroom spider is gone. I'll get him eventually.

Another one next to the window in the kitchen.

I went out and came in an hour ago. He's still there, but now, there's another one on the far side of the kitchen wall!

So...yes, I have an unwelcome spider problem.
Total Comments 50

Comments

Nate's Avatar
:
Honestly, my panic levels are pretty fucking extraordinary when I find a spider inside my house. I don't kill them, though. Fuck that. I make my wife kill them.
Oh, OANST, you're so strong and manly. How can I grow up to be like you?
Posted 09-25-2010 at 06:38 AM by Nate

OANST's Avatar
But spiders are really awful.
Posted 09-25-2010 at 06:53 AM by OANST

OddjobAbe's Avatar
You're always within ten feet of a spider. It is also estimated that in one acre of land, there are a million spiders.
Posted 09-25-2010 at 07:52 AM by OddjobAbe
Updated 09-25-2010 at 07:54 AM by OddjobAbe

Slag?'s Avatar
I don't really have big spiders. But if I ever find one bigger than a fucking inch diameter....

KILL IT,
KILL IT WITH FUCKING FIRE

But the things that scare me shitless are the house centipedes
Posted 09-25-2010 at 09:20 AM by Slag?

Laser's Avatar
:
Blad tarantula,
Time for the massive come sing ya,
Blad tarantula,
Don't play with my style I might sting ya,
Blad tarantula,
You want me inject me bacteria,
And if ya body goin' stiff,
And your spine goin' numb,
Now come for get some...

Time to fix you up something here right now...


Shotter, hitter, serial killer,
Go a your funeral and all drink out your liquor,
When you are bury we a-stand next to the vicar,
Fling on some dirt and make your bury a little quicker,
Shouldn't test the youth them in the Tommy Hilfiger,
Hug up you mama, say sorry to you papa,
All a get number for the little sister
A shall we call her Ill ask her, freeza.
Never kill spiders.
Posted 09-25-2010 at 12:41 PM by Laser

ziggy's Avatar
I feed them to my lizard. It's fun to watch.
Posted 09-25-2010 at 12:47 PM by ziggy

Slag?'s Avatar
Is it torturous looking? send me a video!
Posted 09-25-2010 at 05:46 PM by Slag?

Phylum's Avatar
:
You're always within ten feet of a spider. It is also estimated that in one acre of land, there are a million spiders.
I believe that that's one of those bulshit speculations that have been around for so long that people generally accept them as fact.
Posted 09-26-2010 at 02:17 AM by Phylum

Wings of Fire's Avatar
I was on a plane once, was I ten feet away from a spider then?
Posted 09-26-2010 at 03:32 AM by Wings of Fire

T-nex's Avatar
I like spiders. I find them really cute, and I don't mind having them crawl on me. When I was young there was a short period where I was afraid of them. But then I realized i was just immitating the girls around me that also hated them.
Posted 09-26-2010 at 05:23 AM by T-nex

Ridg3's Avatar


Give it a hug.
Posted 09-26-2010 at 06:12 AM by Ridg3

Hazel-Rah's Avatar
I'm too afraid of spiders to kill them, I won't even touch that thing pictured above with a ten foot pole. Spiders are good for the ecology though.

Posted 09-26-2010 at 12:43 PM by Hazel-Rah

Phylum's Avatar
What kind of spider is that, Ridg3?

EDIT: Oh, it's a camel spider.

That looks weirder than most camel spiders I've seen.
Posted 09-26-2010 at 10:29 PM by Phylum
Updated 09-27-2010 at 12:06 AM by Phylum

Ridg3's Avatar
:
Solifugae is an order of Arachnida, known as camel spiders, wind scorpions or sun spiders, comprising more than 1000 described species in about 153 genera.
Probably why... :P
Posted 09-27-2010 at 02:28 AM by Ridg3

OddjobAbe's Avatar
:
I believe that that's one of those bulshit speculations that have been around for so long that people generally accept them as fact.
It is, but whether it's true or not is not necessarily relevant to what I was trying to do.
Posted 09-27-2010 at 08:00 AM by OddjobAbe

Phylum's Avatar
Oh.
Posted 09-27-2010 at 05:03 PM by Phylum

Crashpunk's Avatar
I hate spiders and I agree with OANST. Kill them.
Posted 09-28-2010 at 03:41 AM by Crashpunk

MA's Avatar
FUCK YOU
Posted 09-28-2010 at 03:50 AM by MA

used:)'s Avatar
Pussies.
Posted 09-28-2010 at 04:51 AM by used:)

MeechMunchie's Avatar
I would have thought everyone found spiders as cute as I do. They're small, round, jumpy, fuzzy, shy, harmless creatures with big round eyes and eight arms to hug you with. Go figure.
Posted 09-28-2010 at 01:43 PM by MeechMunchie

 

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