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I am tormented in this flame...


The shaminator

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I am tormented in this flame...

Posted 08-10-2009 at 10:16 AM by shaman
Ok, so today i visited a market. There was an unusual shop there selling exotic sauces. Some of which as i later found out are the hottest sauces available.

Now, i adore spicy food so i like a reckless idiot buy the hottest sauce i can find, which they rate as being "Heat level 10+++". It is indeed the hottest sauce in the shop.

I get home and am eager to try the thing which has deafeted many because of it's unbearable heat ... i take off the lid and sniff the sauce, it gives off a heavy scent of spices and i think it's going to be alright, so i dab my finger on the inside of the lid and place the TINYEST amount of the sauce on my tounge.

Immidiately, i gasp in pain and almost throw up. It took me fifteen minutes to get rid of the horrible pain in my mouth from the shear spicyness of that sauce, i can't even begin to describe how hot that sauce is. That wans't even edible, it just caused AGONY.

That'll teach me to explore...
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alf's brother's mate's Avatar
The words "you lose" come to mind in this scenario.

ABM
Posted 08-10-2009 at 10:35 AM by alf's brother's mate

Mac Sirloin's Avatar
A friend of mine has 1,000,000 Scoville hot sauce. It irritates your skin and enough of it can cause a rash.

I can't even tell you how many times we decided to put it on food then one of us had to go to the bathroom.

Imagine Fire Ants on your dick for 6 hours.

It's roughly 3 times as bad as what you posted, and this friend plans on getting 7 million scoville sauce sometime soon.

Eating 1 Mil scoville regularly (like, 2, 3 times a week) can shorten your lifespan.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 11:07 AM by Mac Sirloin

Hobo's Avatar
Awesome stuff. Milk is the best for relieving spice pain by the way. Also for your skin.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 11:09 AM by Hobo

MA's Avatar
i cant even eat curries. you are more daring than me.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 11:19 AM by MA

shaman's Avatar
Well done Kastere, you know i'm not going to be able to resist looking for what you just told me about.

You may have just killed me.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 01:39 PM by shaman

Laser's Avatar
:
this friend plans on getting 7 million scoville sauce sometime soon.
So what, he is getting pepper spray?

From wikipedia's scoville page: 5,000,000–5,300,000 Law Enforcement Grade pepper spray,[5] FN 303 irritant ammunition

Anything above that is just pure chemicals pretty much
Posted 08-10-2009 at 01:41 PM by Laser

Mac Sirloin's Avatar
He said 7 Million or 5 Million.

None the less.

Shaman, you'll have to order it off the internet probably.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 01:54 PM by Mac Sirloin

shaman's Avatar
:
Shaman, you'll have to order it off the internet probably.
I imagined so, i could really see that kind of stuff being sold over that counter.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 01:55 PM by shaman

Jordan's Avatar
It's so easy to mix that shit into food, do it now.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 02:06 PM by Jordan

Mac Sirloin's Avatar
Oh, it's legal to sell, but it doesn't have a wide, localized target demographic.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 03:57 PM by Mac Sirloin

Nate's Avatar
I read years ago about a company that was producing pure capsaicin (15,000,000 Scoville) and selling it in 100ml bottles. Before buying it, you had to sign a contract stating that you were in good health and indemnified the company from any responsibility from injury caused by the fluid.

Apparently you'd still be able to taste one drop diluted in a tonne of water.
Posted 08-10-2009 at 06:38 PM by Nate

Mac Sirloin's Avatar
I heard it was Tomato soup, apparently it gave it the feeling of eating horribly spicy watery salsa.

Why don't they weponize this shit. a wepon made of hot sauce would be a great wepon
wepon
WEPON
WEPOOOOOON
Posted 08-10-2009 at 10:46 PM by Mac Sirloin

Crashpunk's Avatar
:
i cant even eat curries. you are more daring than me.
Same with me, its not the taste it the look of them.

It says on the bottle "this sauce will blow you away" it sound like it did
Posted 08-11-2009 at 02:08 AM by Crashpunk

shaman's Avatar
There were other sauces there i wouldn't mind trying, one of them was called "One fuckin' drop at a time".
Posted 08-11-2009 at 04:01 AM by shaman

Nate's Avatar
:
Why don't they weponize this shit. a wepon made of hot sauce would be a great wepon
You mean, like they could make some sort of... capsicum spray?!
Posted 08-11-2009 at 05:45 AM by Nate

Mac Sirloin's Avatar
No, like take shitload of seawater, dump about 4 gallons of 15 Mil Scoville hotsauce in it, and voila, portable lava.

Apart form, being horribly inhumane it sounds brilliant to me.

Of course, it was my idea.
Posted 08-11-2009 at 09:07 AM by Mac Sirloin

alf's brother's mate's Avatar
...I am neither shocked or surprised to hear it come from you.

ABM
Posted 08-11-2009 at 09:10 AM by alf's brother's mate

Bullet Magnet's Avatar
The "hot" flavour of such foods that people mysteriously enjoy is not a flavour at all, but the response of your pain receptors protesting your treatment of your own body.
Posted 08-11-2009 at 10:19 AM by Bullet Magnet

used:)'s Avatar
I know! Right? Just like how the delirious effects of drugs are the result of the interference of the toxins with your brain. I wonder if humans will survive long enough to evolve to a point where the toxins have no sensual effect whatsoever.
Posted 08-11-2009 at 11:11 AM by used:)

OANST's Avatar
But some of the spices that produce those feelings have good flavor.
Posted 08-11-2009 at 11:34 AM by OANST

used:)'s Avatar
Chipotle, Tabasco, Wasabi, and Aji ftw.
Posted 08-11-2009 at 12:15 PM by used:)

 

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