Live from the prestigious Molluck Memorial Hippodrome in Oddywood! It's
The Oddworld Forums Awards 2009! Please put your hands, wings and tentacles together, stamp your feet, talons and tentacles on the floor and whistle loudly (or do that OOH OOH OOH thing if you can't whistle) in supportive welcome of your host for this exciting evening of backstabbing and bribery,
Wired!
Gooooooood evening, good evening, good evening, good evening, good evening and welcome to all you fine ladies and gentlemen and sexless workers. It's wonderful to see you all out tonight in the current oeconomic climate. It's a testament to the industriousness of Cartelkind that we can forget about the monetary woes of people who don't matter and still manage to transport ourselves to a night of luxury entertainment and cuisine.
But in truth we have all been hard hit by recession. High unemployment rates following the kidnapping of thousands of Mudokon loyalites has led to horrendous sacrifices. Stamp Duty now means we have limited ability to freely to kick our employees. And subsidies on hanging and drawing have been quartered.
Cost cutting measures have affected every industry, including the awards ceremony industry. The price of gold is the highest it's ever been, so the statuettes given to winners of this year's awards will instead be made of velcro (and incidentally if you have any old, gold awards from previous years lying about your house, if you post them to Moolah4Gold you'll receive a note informing you of how much you've donated within 4 to 6 weeks). That said, here are this year's categories!
The Categories
Best Thread Creator
Best Blogger
Greatest Debator
Funniest Poster
Most Unintentionally Funny Poster
Most Meaningful Poster
Most Underrated Poster
Best Advice Giver
Member with the Greatest Oddworld Knowledge
Best New Comer
Most Welcome Return
Best Veteran
Dearly Missed Member
Most Liked
Most Eccentric
Most Annoying
Most Accomplished Troll
Best Couple
Most Dedicated Member
Member in Dire Need of a Life
Best Staff Member
Member Who’d Make a Good Moderator
The Oddworld Forums Unofficial Mascot
Most Valuable Poster (MVP)
By way of minimal explanation, all votes should be cast based on the activity of 2009 alone! Best New Comer and Most Welcome Return should have started posting/returned last year. Dearly Missed Member should not have posted at all in 2009, or since. Members qualify as veterans if they started posting prior to
2005.
Procedure and Rules
Procedure is the same as always. No nominations, no applications, just vote for which members you think are most deserving of each award by posting them here or sending them to to me email or private message. You don't have to vote on every single category, and you can submit more than one member per category if you really, really cannot decide between
two or three members.
There is to be
- no voting for yourself, and
- no telling other members whom to vote for, whether that's you or someone else.
Regarding the second rule, I see a lot of graffiti in signatures promoting certain members above others with regards to some kind of vote. I'm sure it's all innocent antics not related to this, but it could be construed as a violation of the Terms of Service. Remove it immediately.
By the way, contravening of any rule is punishable by elimination of your eligibility to partake in the receival of any awardation.
To some this may seem like a popularity contest but it's all done in the name of good honest fun. Don't feel bad if you don't get voted for something or anything: the awards bestow no tangeable benefit on the winners. Except for awesomeness.
Voting starts right away and will continue for 3 weeks so the results will be posted on 27 January.
Don't post updates of who's winning what and how many votes such-and-such person has. There's nothing to stop you ruining the suspense for yourself by counting public votes but don't be a party pooper and spoil it for others, doofus.
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