I haven't even received any cake yet. Tonight I've got a family dinner, but I requested birthday chocolate mousse, rather than cake.
In other news, this is the only present I have received so far. Regular viewers may remember Chaps, the 40cm tall blow up sex doll I received last year. This was from the same guy.
It's a strap-on, vibrating, 'Robotic', penis extender. You're meant to slip your wang inside, then use this to pleasure your partner. Now, I dont' know about you, but I'd be pretty insulted if my partner ever suggested that I even needed extending, let along a thick latex sheathe that is going to essentially create a half-centimetre thick buffer between me and him.
Also, leaving aside the fact that Simon thinks my penis
needs extending, he's given me an extender that is actually smaller than my penis already is. Go figure.