I'm Sure That Many Of You Have Encountered Fools That Type Like This (For The Slow Among You, Begin Each Word With A Fucking Capital To Screw Up Your Head). Unfortunately, That Is One Of The Several Things That Are Making Me Sad Tonight.

It took me forever to write that. I don't know how they do it. Anyway, I feel sad and a little pissed off tonight. Firstly, the reason stated above, but that isn't making me sad as such. I just read a whole damn paragraph written like that tonight,...

I know my friend Tony was selling his bass (a really nice one, it has better action than any of my others, and you get a real punch out of the sound when it's played through my Peavey amp) for £150-odd. I was interested, but I promised Emily that I wouldn't buy anything over £100 until we'd balanced the books, so I told him that I had a nephew who was very into music, and was looking for a bass, hoping that he'd lower the price. He did. I got it for £80.

Now, I didn't lie. My nephew...

姓名：何炅
原名：
组合成员：
性别：男
英文名：
出生年：1974年
生日：4月28日
星座：白羊座
国籍：中国
地域：中国大陆
职业：主持人 歌手 演员
身高：172cm
血型：A型
三围：
何炅简介
1974年4月　出生于湖南省长沙
1980年9月　就读长沙市长塘里小学(至1986年7月小学……

If somebody can link me to where I copied this, you'll get praise.

Jesus, Fridays are boring.

SOMEBODY DO SOMETHING RIGHT NOW.

My day is over. Emily is asleep. There's nothing on the idiot box. I don't want to disturb the neighbours with my instruments again, because they complained the last time. I am bored out of my fucking mind with NO work to be done at all. My only hope is the old web, and even that's bloody boring.

DO SOMETHING. NOW.

I just took our (16 year old) dog to the vet's to be put to sleep yesterday (he's been in agony since some dickhead vet recommended that we put him on some pills). Really, what's happened has only just sunk in. I miss the greedy bastard already. We both feel like shit. We've no idea what to do with the yellow ball, but we don't want to keep it.

I'm not here for sympathy. I've discussed the matter with Emily. I'll just feel better for posting this.

At last, my nephew's started watching Sooty again. That means no more cartoons that I don't really remember! Problem is, these aren't the Sooty shows that I remember. They are similar, but they live in a shop instead of a house. Different bloke, too. I do, however, have vague memories of him. I must have grown out of it just after he started doing it.

I really don't mind skipping my important work to watch glove puppets. Who gives a toss about work when you can watch Sweep learn about...

I had a terrible day at work, one of the valves on my alto sax is knackered (and I only had the bastard thing in for a new cork the other week), and one of my best friends' irritating obsession with these daft social networking sites is driving me over the bend.

Sympathy, please.

My nephew's been watching Ducktales. Is there a way to get that darn theme out of your head? It's been stuck in there for hours making me musically inpotent.

Any advice will be rewarded with...

...you'll have to find out.

I need to stop giving my nephew kids' videos to shut him up. I recently gave him Dumbo, and now he keeps perstering me to play Casey Jr. on the piano for him. This is terrible. Maybe I should make him watch The Texas Chain Saw Massacre. That'll shut him up.

If it was anyone else, it'd be fine. It'd be more like "Oh, here's something I haven't seen in a long time, I'll watch it once with him, and he/she won't pester me any more, it may even be nice", but no, that little cretin has to...

...but I cannot go to sleep yet, as I need to wait for Emily to finish reading her book.

Talking of books, I recently ordered Darwin's On Origin of Species. Purely because I'm interested.
And I want to look intelligent.