Okay, so a friend of mine has decided to move to Kingston. He's found a pretty kick-ass apartment that's 10 minutes from downtown Kingston (a very happening place) and various other essentials being very closeby. As a matter of fact, there's a KFC and an Adult video store closer than the nearest grocer, so you can see the appeal of it having all the essentials.

Anyway, said friend has made it quite clear I'd be welcome to room with him, as the place has 3 bedrooms. Rent would be about...

Hollyyyyy shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiitttt am I tuckered out. I just hit my 'Vacation's over' wall a little over sixty hours after we got back. It was a nice time, but the transition from "Comfortably windy summer Cottage weather beside the ocean" to "Central Ontario in the middle of a brain-addling heatwave" was a little sudden. I'm suffering from heat-exhaustion-caused-stress or something. Everything is pissing me off. I need to basically have a cold beverage in my hand at all times and take a cold shower...

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Here's the skinny:

I've decided to write a book...




Trilogy. It's called "Adventures in Low Rudge" (working title), book 1 is so far untitled, book two is 'Sons of Low Rudge' and Book 3 is 'The Giant of Man'. I also had kind of a crazy idea for a fourth sequel, but we'll get to that.

The Book centers around Three sets of Characters, Cris Laimon and Daniel Chimera Jesfort are the first. They were both born in Low Rudge and currently...

Oh man I'm hungry





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The second time I saw S'Peejay was earlier today, while I was hauling in some rotten books from the car that my mom recently deemed halfway-ownable (The books, not the car. I've jerkily and angrily humped that car before.) A chance glance out the front door after hearing some indistinct shouting revealed S'Peejay and a teenage white girl, anywhere from 16-18 (S'peejay is anywhere from 15 to 23. He's so fucking weird looking.) Girly Girlfriend was farting out of her mouth at my man Tha S'Peej about...

I've been trying to keep something a secret. It's both a knowledge and a man, but it's also neither.

Its name is S'Peejay Dunkler.

I'm not entirely sure that's his real name, but I met him walking my awful, half-dead dog Milo a few weeks ago. He was shambling down my street looking miserably happy; this forced, jagged grin splayed under a pair of jilted, sagging eyes. The kind of face you make in a mirror when you're super bored. He noticed me with a hideous little...

Analogous
Nationalities
Are
Lame!

Coming soon to the Low Rudge Community Shopping Centre--ANAL! This not-for-profit group has been campaigning cross county and country to show the world that portraying a real, living race in television as something wholly different for the sake of imagery or message is wrong!

Join us August 6th-to-9th at 3:00 PM - 6:15 PM for informative family fun in the Fort wing at Low Rudge Community Shopping Centre!

I fell two feet from a window sill trying to see if a little RC helicopter I bought was stuck on the small doorway overhang on the dilapidated old daycare next door. In bare feet.

My right foot hit some uneven dirt, rolled and a series of pops erupted from my ankle. Then it started to hurt. Like it was on fire, but it was old fire. I had to hop over to my house, call an ambulance, and watch in utter horror as my ankle ballooned to a god damn fleshy globe.

My mom is...